Sad Shack

Neglect will reduce your self worth more than anything, it will force you into feeling unworthy of reaching out, too irrelevant to care about. It will not only make you feel abandoned and alone, but everything special and good about you will get erased as there is nobody who would notice, or care about it. All the incredible things people enjoy in their children will shrivel up inside of you, telling you that you’re different, and no good things can come from you. Struggling alone and feeling ashamed of yourself for wanting help will be your reality – how could anyone convince you that it’s not what you deserve after it happened hundreds of times? That’s what neglect does.

And it turns out, nope, everyone still wants you to keep it down and act normal or you're not a part of society and you will still be ostracized if you say what happened because people prefer pretending it doesn't happen and they don't wanna hear about it.

They also convince you that the world inside of their house, and the world outside, are to different worlds, and only the outside is 'the real world', and it's a place you, according to them, know nothing about, and would never survive in. Outside world is at the same time filled with dangerous individuals, who would hurt you (unlike your parents, who also hurt you, but those outsiders would hurt you worse, apparently), and filled with stupid people who know nothing and are to be insulted and humiliated (abusive parents will often degrade homeless people, minorities, addicts and anyone they deem less worthy, and you'll be stuck in feeling like at least you're not them, but at the same time scared you'll become them, and then you'll be degraded just like that as well.)

In this 'us versus them' situation, your parents are the smartest, the only ones who know what the 'correct way to live is', and the 'correct way to raise children'. They'll tell you how you're supposed to think, behave, speak and act. Their words are the highest truth and not to be questioned or criticized; any criticism will be met with hostility and attacks, and insisting that any other way of thinking would convert them to the 'non desirables' (see above about the minorities and homeless people).

And the thing is, this is a tactic that cults use to make people unable to leave. Convincing people that the thinking and methods inside are vastly superior and better, that anyone outside who doesn't follow their methods is stupid, tainted, incapable of normal life, and that people outside are simultaneously stupid and wrong, but also dangerous, hateful, capable of doing intense harm to you, that's how the cults terrify people into belief that they can never live outside. That it's both dangerous and wrong to even want to.

No, it is not a moral virtue to tolerate or forgive abuse. No, the victims would not go on a revenge campaigns if they were not silenced and told to get over it. No, the society would not descend into chaos if we forced people to take responsibility for actions of abuse towards their immediately family and loved ones. And no, pushing victims to forgive and accept abusers, is not an act of moral virtue. It is an act of evil.

All that this accomplishes is more abuse, more frequent abuse, more freedom to abuse, and more isolation and helplessness for the victims. Which is exactly what the abusers want.

abusers: We're going to kick you out! You owe us for keeping you alive! You're eating our food! You'll do what you're told while you're living under our roof!

DON'T YOU THINK MY PRIORITY SHOULD BE TO GET AWAY FROM ABUSE WHILE I'M STILL ALIVE?