breathing clean, clean air

told my parents i miss archaeology and my mom was, very sympathetically, like: “do you want to dig holes in the garden?” and i was like. yes. i want to dig holes in the garden.

These are both moods, but unfortunately I am primarily a bioarchaeologist. (IE, I specialize in digging up old human skeletons.) And, uh, home-made bioarchaeology is tragically discriminated against by law enforcement.

Only if you get caught

This whole post took an unexpected turn

Out of work paleontologists can take a page out of the Girl Scouts handbook and eat a chicken, clean the bones, encase them in a mud and plaster mix, then chip it back out. Which is legitimately how Girl Scouts earn their paleontology badge.

… I rebuilt my chicken by modeling muscles back onto the bones using clay, then putting skin on it and making it look like a dinosaur…. 

Perfect. Exactly the right way to add a part 2 to this project.

enrichment

How do I explain Plato’s allegory of the cave to quarantined archeologists?

::wheeze::

I'm not much for dancing but FOR YOU I DID

You don't understand. I'm not writing fanfiction 😈💋💦🌶🥵, I'm writing fanfiction 🍉🐸💣🦴🫂🥸🍞⛵👽❄🐵🤔

international cut your hair like your icon day how screwed are you 

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

microwave popcorn is such a beautiful technology. captures the full range of sensory and emotional experiences. there's even a part where it gets loud and scary. the 1812 overture of cheap snacks