”became mentally ill”

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@whatsallthisnow
”became mentally ill”

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The important part of making horrible kitchen concotions is to give them properly horrid names. I have discovered a new dish: The Blended Devil.
It's like deviled eggs, but instead of taking the yolks out of the eggs, you just mash the entire boiled eggs into mush with a fork and mix the rest of the ingredients in there. Eaten from a bowl, with a fork or a spoon depending on the consistency. Or go at it labrador style with your face down in the bowl if you're like that. Not up to me.
That already has a name. It's called egg salad T-T
How is a concotion of eggs, mayo, mustard, and seasonings to taste a salad? It contains zero leafy green or vegetable.
A salad can just be a chopped mix of things. That’s egg salad alright. I put it on sandwiches. You can also put pickle relish and/or chopped onion in it.
If we go by the definition that any chopped mess of random bullshit counts as a salad, then I guess I'm a salad.
If that’s what you feel in your heart I won’t tell you that you’re wrong
The first rule of sewing is you can fix anything if you have patience, creativity, and a little bit of extra fabric! The second rule of sewing is AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
I was gifted bathtub bulgestarion for my bday what should I do with him. Good and bad ideas please
Update I am putting this cactus in it I am dying how did they have a cactus So Perfect
ITS DONE
HIGHLY IMPORTANT UPDATE HE IS IN BLOOM
I thought they got rid of porn on this site
Tbh germ theory DOES sound crazy. Like if you told a regency-era nobleman that tiny creatures lived on the surface of everything and THAT’S what causes consumption, they’d be like “ah, I see you are a lunatic. Would you reside in my hermitage? Rantings and ravings do so amuse my guests”
But if you told a Medieval person this they would probably go "Ah, so when the miasma settles on surfaces it gains evil life. I understand."
Yeah, actually, it would probably be pretty easy to explain germ theory to a Medieval person as tiny evil spirits that live on everything, but they can be purified by soap and water, or by alcohol, because that is why God has granted us those things. And because they can float in the air, if you cough or sneeze after they have infested you, that can cause them to infest others. And when you are sick, the angels God has deputized to defend the bodies of His beloved children are at war with the evil spirits, and, sadly, sometimes they lose, but the best way to help your angels win their battle is to rest, drink plenty (this would probably be small beer in this time period, not water, because the water was also infested), stay clean, and for the sake of God do not allow anyone to let your blood, for the angels need that blood in their war against the evil spirits. Bloodletting is good for some types of illnesses but not the kinds caused by the tiny evil spirits.
boiling as a sterilization measure is also easy to explain. water returns to the air when heated and it rises as steam back up to the floodgates of heaven; we know God created the world in seven days, He's not up there making more water every time it rains. it circulates. the returning of water to heaven also purifies the water of unclean and malign influences. you know wormy water from a muddy puddle will kill your kid. you know you wouldn't wade into a bog and have a slurp. water that remains in the low places of earth absorbs all that is unclean from our waste and it may also sponge up new diseases from hell, we're not totally sure about that one, but it seems likely. God set up the heavenly water cycle so that the earth's waters wouldn't totally fill up with gunk.
what does this have to do with boiling your surgical tools? well look, the boiling water releases bubbles of steam which carries the malign influences up to heaven. you boil a knife, you send all the miasmic particles off with the steam to heaven. if you rinse the knife off in a bucket the water isn't hot enough, the particles go into the water and then right back on to the knife. you gotta boil it to get the particles all the way away. how can a tool or rag or a bed have miasmic particles on it when you can't smell them? humans have a lousy sense of smell. look at your dog on the hunt. are there no rabbits in the woods just because you can't smell them? we know that miasma is carried on the air, and is what makes stench so dangerous, and we know that humans can't smell worth a damn compared to dogs cats horses etc. a dog can smell if a rat died in a corner of the room last week. you can't. do you think licking the spot where the rat died is going to go well for you? luckily, what humans lack in snout we make up for in brains. we have extra brains where our sniffers should have been. God set that up for a reason.
and why does a rinse with wine spirits work? man, look how fast alcohol evaporates. my guess is that because wine contains a lot more vice than water, it evaporates a whole lot faster, in sort of an equal and opposite way that a rock falls faster than a feather. if you want the miasmic particles to get off there FAST, you dunk it in something that's going back to heaven at a gallop.
what's up with honey? it just preserves things against corruption. doesn't clean them off. honey doesn't evaporate at all. probably because bees don't sin. it's not good for ridding a tool of particles-- it's sticky-- but fine for preserving anything you don't want to go to heaven OR hell. this is why you wash the wound with wine spirits or purified water FIRST, to sluice the miasma out, then slap the honey on AFTER. and boil the damn bandage, too. you wouldn't put a rotten door in a sound doorframe and expect it to keep out bandits, would you? cmon.
Medieval people also already knew that putting things out in the sun helped to keep them clean (UV radiation killing bacteria). So everyone knows that after you use a butter churn, you rinse it out, give it a scrub, and set it out in the sun to dry, or else it will go sour and everything you make with it will go bad fast. Likewise with when you want to get sheets and clothes really clean and fresh, you boil them with lye soap and then lay them out in the sun to dry.
Medieval paesant: yes, yes, makes total sense
JFK Jr: I take my grandkids to swim in a sewer and dig roadkill
This kind of process is called "headology" in Discworld and is the foundation for an entire branch of witchcraft in the series.

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This has been in my queue for four months.
people needdddd to wear headphones in public because while on an otherwise very lovely walk in the park today i saw a guy sitting under a tree watching a porn parody of the star wars prequels
if nothing else trying to tune out the sounds of anakin and padme going to town as i contemplate the babbling brook gave me a brief but vivid window into what it’s like to be obi wan kenobi
I feel like I’ve been seeing people assuming that every stupid take must be made by an American more often lately. To the point where I see people assuming I must not be American specifically because I’m informed about something?
Like I fully get criticizing American attitudes about certain things but there are dumbasses everywhere you know.
Like for example people assuming that I’m not American because I like roundabouts? And because I’m informed about safe road design? I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you needed to be from a specific place to care about reducing car accidents.
Anyways I’m just bitching after I just woke up about something that doesn’t matter. I’m gonna go have a coffee.
Liking roundabouts is specifically a french urban area administrator's characteristics, and no one else's, so congratulations on being assigned your new identity.
Source
No please I was thinking about Carmel, Indiana USA when I was talking about roundabouts don’t take me to the baguette hexagon
France is clearly a pentagon. You must be American.
L'Hexagone is literally a common nickname for France
The French must be American
Say that out loud on the streets of Paris and see how long you survive.
You’ve heard of the Roaring 20s........
now get ready for the Screaming 20s - coming to a decade near you in 2020
is it too early or can we start screaming now
in retrospect perhaps we should have started sooner

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knock knock
who's there
deez
sigh
deez who ?
deez are the voyages of the starship enterprise
another underappreciated tumblr feature that you dont get on other sites is the queue. i love it when something i thought was funny six months ago and then forgot about a week later crawlts its way out of the processing vortex and i get to see it all over again.
you should queue this post it would be funny and grant me immortality
you motherfuckers put me in the processing vortex
I never thought I would be siding with the pope’s involvement in politics and cheering him on. I will say that.
For things to live, other things must die. And for some reason my high school youth director decided to explain this concept to us with salsa.
Elaborate???
THE FOOD OR THE DANCE???? WHAT???
I thought it was obvious that it was the food because generally the dance doesn’t involve very much death but egg on my face for thinking that literally anything is obvious I guess
thank you for the clarification but pray do tell How exactly did he explain the concept of life and growth coming from decay and death using salsa the food??
She pointed out that in order to make the salsa you need to cut up the vegetables and herbs. You kill them to nourish yourself.
This is the pattern of most food, generally. As animals we must eat living or formerly living matter in order to survive. Whether that be plants or meat, something has usually died in that process even if it’s just one small part of it.
Anyways this was originally a post about how every time I chop an onion now I think about how I’m killing it because of that comparison she made but it’s turned into me explaining over and over again to people that yes indeed you do kill plants when you eat them and people arguing with me about obscure forms of bacteria.

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Every day I get a little closer to saying fuck it and becoming an apprentice in some at risk heritage craft or profession.
"let's have AI-"
I'm gonna go learn the art of hand engraving or thatched roofing. Maybe hand make clogs.
time for a
little horny posting
Little horny on main