Experience Heart-Melting Love with handsome wizards.

You gotta be really publicly passionate about things if you want your friends to text you. Bc people will forget to text you because they’re human. But if you’re really openly the friend who loves identifying ants your friends will think of you when they see ants. And they’ll text you “what ant is this [blurry photo]”. And then they’ll ask you how you’ve been and we should get coffee sometime. But if they don’t know what you love they’ll never know what you like

And then when the ant convention is in town they’ll be like dude… we should go to the ant convention. But they would never think to go if they didn’t know u loved ants

And sometimes you need to ask them to go to the ant convention. But you Will not get anywhere hiding your passions

the unimaginable power of saying "huh, guess that's not for me" and moving on with your life

we must make haste in killing every harry potter fan

sometimes you read fic and it mentions something you know too much about and you have to pause and decide if the illusion is ruined

that man would not fucking know how to make croissants. he would not have his shit together like that

you dont just make croissants in the morning on a day off on a whim. croissants are a weekend event. he’s on the verge of the worst relapse of his life he did NOT stay up late beating the fuck out of his butter block to make it flat -> doing several laminations. i just dont believe that

you have to remember it's always always worse on twitter

If you saw me recreationally vaccinating homeschooled children with blow darts then you should be thanking me, no? Relax a little. Blow darts are cool

You are just jealous of my ethical human safari

as part of their ongoing boycott, Canada will no longer provide the US with totally real long-distance girlfriends who definitely exist