wait I'm stoated

got chased by a skeleton but when they caught me they just gave me a kiss and hug. turns out it was an xoskeleton.

yeah i jacked off sliwa in 98. Jk. i jacked him off in 77. when he founded the guardian angels. The little red hat was cute, he had a shy male swag. i gave him Hole in 98. Anyways, i was going to let him kiss me but he lost so im goinng to kill myself

*kisses you directly on the lips* That doesn’t mean anything. *tries to walk away but my ankle rolls and i break it so now you have to put me down for ethical reasons*

[ID: a digital bust drawing of Merrill and Isabela from Dragon Age 2. Merrill is kissing Isabela on the cheek and she smiles. End ID]

"imagine holding a boy down and chewing his wings off 😖😵‍💫" -posts an ant would make if they made tumblrs small enough

putting a can of chef boy ar dee up my ass call that boofaroni

and the ugliest