hum along ‘til the feeling’s gone forever

NOT DOLLY PARTON NO.

I saw a headcanon (idk where I'm sorry) of Shane having an OF account once and it is canon to me till this day. He started the account before the site became a porn dealership and posted hours and hours of videos of him explaining hockey plays on his little whiteboard with his little glasses and focused face. The account became famous years later, after the whole porn dealership thing, and people got so excited to have access to Shane nudes only to then be greeted by the nerd of all times™️

ilya sending a pair of panties to shane’s apartment in montreal and shane texts him “What the fuck is wrong with you” and ilya says “you like? )))) i buy for all my girls” and shane says “Fuck off” and ilya says “wear them next time” and shane says “I’m not doing that.” and ilya says “fine then i’m not fucking you” and well. shane can’t risk that. but their next hookup is in boston which means shane has to hide them in his suitcase—should he ball them up in a pair of socks? what if hayden decides to borrow his socks? he’s never done it before but what if now is the time? he ends up zipping them into the lining like he’s trying to smuggle drugs and getting on the plane with his suitcase is that “what if i accidentally brought a gun through TSA” feeling times a million. getting them out and putting them on in the hotel bathroom later, trying to make sure hayden doesn’t see him slip them out of the suitcase and into his sweatshirt sleeve, is like a mission-impossible level of sweat. and finally he shows up at ilya’s house and he’s on ilya’s doorstep and ilya opens the door and he raises his eyebrows and says “are you wearing them” and shane grits out a “yes” between his teeth and ilya nods down and says “let me see” without letting shane inside and shane glares off to side of but he hooks a thumb into his joggers and pulls them down just enough to show off the lace, right there on the doorstep (and he knows ilya doesn’t really have neighbors but like. jesus christ this feels so exposed) and ilya’s grin is so wide when finally he lets shane come in