I think the combination of witnessing my parents’ shitty relationship, not having any example of a happy relationship to observe in life, and dealing with several people who have made me feel worthless have all made me lose interest in even trying to date anyone. I’m considering that maybe I’m better off being single for life. My current crush is only the second person I’ve met to come closest to what I want in a partner (but he doesn’t match it entirely, he’s not atheist) but he’s already married so I have to keep a distance. The shitty people I’ve come across along with my own father’s behavior have unfortunately made me believe that there is nothing to be gained by letting someone new into my life