Misty

i’m so lazy… i have so much to post about, my plants, books, memes and whatnot but my habit of procrastinating kills my potential. i hate it, i hate myself sm for it, i never learn. i keep doing the same mistakes again and again. i keep going back to similar old patterns no matter how much i try. there’s no point trying i feel, if eventually i end up in the same place i started from. everything i do always goes in the wrong way, no matter how right my intention was, will i ever get what i want? why do i never get what i want no matter what i do, why does everything go in the opposite direction? why does everything break me? when will i finally get what i deserve, am i not doing enough but what really is enough?

idk but something’s wrong with me like i love to sleep and am sleepy all the time but nowadays even though my eyes get so heavy begging for some sleep, i just can’t get myself to actually fall asleep??? what’s happening, this wouldn’t happen before aahhhh

i just ate an 99% cacao dark chocolate and ughh what was that, the bitter taste wouldn’t go afterwards either. i don’t think i like chocolate maybe it’s just the sugar