Simply The Worst Star Wars Fan

Search engines are now total crap. I still try them, but it has become harder and harder to find solutions to issues I run into. My company does have a Power BI-specific AI agent, and I already know if I ask someone for help, they’re gonna ask if I’ve consulted the agent first. So, I do that now. If it answers my question, cool, and if it doesn’t, I can tell the person who ends up helping me that I gave it the ol’ college try.

The AI agent is so bad at its job, though. It was built using CoPilot, a Microsoft product, to specifically specialize in Power BI, also a Microsoft product. If any agent can give me information about Power BI, it should be this one.

Let me walk you through a barely dramatized summary of what I just went through:

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Me: Is there a way to stop my card visual from rounding a count?

Power BI Agent: Sure! There are several ways to do this!

Change “Display Units” to None

Use a custom measure written in DAX, which you hate

Adjust the formatting on the card

Me: I don’t see “Display Units” anywhere. Where do I find this?

PBIA: OMG you’re so right. That’s because PBI changed the format pane three years ago, so you may not know where to find it!

Classic Card visual: (pretend I wrote out where to find it here)

New Card Visual (Modern ribbon experience): Select card>Format pane>Visual tab>”Callout Value” settings>Display Unit

Me: I’m using the new card visual but do not see Display Unit.

PBIA: that explains it! (Repeats the same instructions to find “Display Units” under “Callout Value”.)

Me: Display Units is not under Callout Value

PBIA: Got it—this means you’re running into New Card visual default behavior. Power BI removed “Display Units” for cards that show a single data value directly. If you disable this behavior globally, it should fix it! (Pretend I wrote out the global disablement instructions here.)

Me: the option to disable this globally literally does not exist.

PBIA: you’re absolutely correct—the option to globally disable this is no longer available in the current Power BI UI. Here’s what you really need to do:

Change the format of your data to something only available for data stored as integers.

Use that custom measure involving DAX, a thing that you hate.

Me: the card is displaying the count of rows of a string column. There is no way to convert this to an integer.

PBIA: thanks for giving me that information, which I absolutely needed but never specified I needed throughout this entire process. You’re gonna have to use that measure which uses DAX, a thing you hate.

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I mean, to its credit, the custom measure with DAX did work, and it did write the DAX for me as a part of its instructions (don’t let this detail fool you; its DAX-writing capabilities are questionable at best in my experience).

This is her left side right after releasing Han. It looks like it might just be a braided bun?

But, no, it’s not a braided bun. This is actually giving that period of time in the 2010s when I constantly wore a braid inspired by Katniss Everdeen to work (and even now, a lot of my French/Dutch braids become Katniss braids because I think the muscle memory is still in there somehow???).

These indicate there might be some sort of twisting going on???

We’re back to looking like a braided bun on her left side.

But her right side looks like a pull-through faux braid situation??? Or maybe knots? I know when my hair was longer, I would sometimes tie it into a literal knot as the base for buns or something, so maybe it’s partially that???

These elements don’t fully make sense together, but…like…someone either did her hair or designed a hair piece. What did they do?!

Like, my close friends know this about me, but they've been around for nearly half my life. They experienced my 2010s hipster phase and my eating disorder relapse and me dating a guy named Ryan for 7 1/2 weeks. Also, those same friends are offline to the point that I think they don't know that fanfiction has a stigma; it's just one of many hobbies their friend Chelsea has had over the past 19 years, right up there with vlogging, horseback riding, and baking desserts.