aggressive farting

I hope everyone loses the world cup and then the universe explodes

Jabber and Momoa are close friends for me.

you know those studies showing that cursing helps with pain tolerance or whatever. that’s how i feel about making my weird little noises to get through my basic daily activities. sometimes you just have to go hggblaaaah for a minute so you can find the strength within yourself to get up or wash the dishes or send an email. mmmnneh. urgh. the torments are unending but you can always make some little sounds about it.

Babe are you okay I saw you reblogging "here's the life I've always longed for"

okay. breathe. listen to my voice. can you tell me five things in this room you can fuck?

okay great. now list me four things in this room you can kill.

beautiful. there you go. okay. now: tell me three things you can impose unjust taxes on.

almost done. can you list two things you could shove in a pipe and smoke?

sometimes you just gotta go "man i actually don't give a shit" and keep scrolling. online survival skill 101

Jabber wants to be a woman solely because he's jealous that they can experience the worst pain a human can go through (childbirth) and he can't (also he's jealous of periods)