Look, I read. A Lot. The dozen-books-a-week type. Except my bestie introduced me to free fanfic online amid highschool, which is both free and requires no rushing to the library before they close. So. Between classic-definition Epics and endless one-shots and everything in between? Yeah. I read A Lot. This is for That Sort of stuff. Prompts, ficlets, recs, headcannons, and of course Analyses Galore, of everything from fanfic to comics to novels and historic media. 99.9% reblogs, ofc.
Danny decides to be a chaos gremlin and takes a pride flag to the moon. He takes a picture then posts it on social media as the way he comes out. Most everyone who sees it thinks it was photoshop.
Except the Batfam because after checking the Watchtower security feeds they see Danny actually on the moon and the flag is still there. Thus they start investigating Danny and Amity Park.
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In Avatar fics the seems to be a trend where Toph put her hand on peoples face's (usually Zuko's?) to see them and I can't help but imagine that if she wanted to see someone's face she would get them to lie in the dirt (or trip them into it) face first then put her hands on the ground to let earth sense see for her
I imagine that sand would be a perfect medium for making face-prints into, and yet remember how much Toph hated the desert specifically because the sand being millions of tiny particles that move independently fucks with how bending it works. Makes shit blurry and shifting and loose and Bleh.
Makes me wonder how much really loose soil does or does not work similarly? Probably Not as drastic an effect as sand but at least a lil blurry-er than hard packed dense soil let alone solid rock.
Also wonder if really wet sand makes a difference. Wet beach sand can get QUITE solid compared to dry, so. Hm...
(This is absolutely a component in why she likes to trip people Often, aside from it being conveniently easy for her to amuse herself with. Can see thru the Sense with her bare feet, after all. No need to be Obvious about it, except to force someone to Stay Still.)
In Avatar fics the seems to be a trend where Toph put her hand on peoples face's (usually Zuko's?) to see them and I can't help but imagine that if she wanted to see someone's face she would get them to lie in the dirt (or trip them into it) face first then put her hands on the ground to let earth sense see for her
SY WHO'S REINCARNATED INTO A STORY ABOUT A BOY AND HIS EVIL BROTHER. THEY FIGHT AND EVENTUALLY PEACE AND LOVE WINS OUT.
RIGHT WELL THE CREATOR RECENTLY RELEASED AN EXTRA ABOUT THE BROTHER THAT TURNS THE WHOLE STORY UPSIDE ITS HEAD.
AFTER READING IT SY FLIPS HIS SHIT BECAUSE THE VILLAIN DIDN'T DESERVE THAT STUPID BUTTFUCK ENDING.
So, there's three brothers in the story. There's Shen Jiu, the eldest; There's (idk I can't think of a name for this one so we call call him SD, for SUCKS DICK.) SD, the middle; and there's Shen Yuan, the youngest. The story basically follows SD as he is welcomed into the Shen family after being lost at birth (cliche plot, we already know).
Well he's a manipulative little shit that aims to take out Shen Jiu, the eldest with the most power, the heir. Shen Jiu isn't aware of this, he just assumes that being on the street's done SD roughly, and that SD's just as wary as he was upon getting back (Sj had a kidnapping incident when he was younger where he was living on the streets, but was eventually recovered and bla bla bla)
Right well so SD falls in love with YQ, SJ's "best friend" and does everything in his power to cause a rift (he doesn't manage to do it between SJ and YQ but he's able to get the shen family to make an arraneg marriage between YQ and SD.) Note, YQ only treats SD well because SD's SJ's brother.
anyways through SD's like manipulation SJ thinks that YQ is madly in love with SD and decides to back off for both of their sake, except SD isn't satisfied with this and continues his plan of running SJ out of the family.
Bla bla bla in the original story SJ's framed like a villain and the plan succeeds. Nobody's on his side (or well YQ, tried he really did. But SJ thought that YQ was playing with his feelings and whatever), not even the younger brother he'd spent the years of his life with after the whole kidnapping incident. The one he'd bonded with and somewhat spoiled.
And he dies, just like that.
Except not Shen Yuan's in the body of the Shen Yuan in the story, and he refuses to let his older brother die after reading about his injustice in the extras. The moment he realizes just what story he's in, he's picked what side to stand on. Because he's the doted on youngest it's easy to break SD's apart with that air of intentional stupidity.
SD trying to accuse SJ of throwing your treasured necklace thing away? Well actually he didn't because SY spent all day bothering him, when would he have the time to do that?
SD trying to sabotage their relationship this time? Well you can't because SY's barging in while SJ's reading the letters you've forged and pointing out the miniscule difference in the handwriting.
SD: heh this letter'll get him to back off.
SJ, reading what seems to be a secret letter meant for SD: ...
SY, barging in under the guise of wanting SJ's attention: Gege did youâOh, is that a letter from QI-ge? Did he send me anything this time? Hey wait, doesn't Yue Qi dot his I's differently? Did he change the way he writes?
SJ, thoughtfully: No, I don't think he has.
-â
BONUS POINTS IF:
SJ is self aware and has his payback planned, only to be surprised when his normally indifferent (to the matters between SD and SJ) is sticking up for him.
or
SJ has lived through the story and is confused on why SY is acting different in this lifetime.
-
SD's trying to win SY over but SY keeps rejecting his attempts by playing the role of the airhead
SD: Hi SY, I know this is our first time meeting but I've prepared this gift for you, I'm going to be your brother from now on, okay? (holding out some expensive bracelet)
SY, using his spoiled richboy airhead aura: Oh... No thanks that looks cheaply made and I don't like wearing silver anyways.
SD's fuming while everyone's like "SY is young he didn't mean anything by it, just let it slide this once" or whatever and there's nothing SD can do
FORGOT THE OTHER BONUS, BONUS IF SHEN YUAN HAS A SYSTEM WHERE HE'S SUPPOSED TOPLAY THE ROLE OF THE "KIND HEARTED YOUNGEST" BUT CAN BYPASS IT JUST BY SMILING.
LIKE HE'S SAYING ALL OF THESE HENIOUS THINGS WITH THE WARMEST SMILE ON HIS FACE.
Danny and Jason knew each other as kids and did a little kiddie wedding as children like to do- playing at getting married. They didnât like the traditional vow of âtill death do us partâ so they changed it. Only it is Gotham and somehow their little ceremony ends up being actually magically binding.
Years later life has separated them the way Death no longer can. Dannyâs family moved away. Jason got adopted. They drift apart. Emails becoming shorter and less frequent until the media blackout around Amity Park stops them altogether. Friends fall out of touch. It happens.
Then Death comes for one of them. Because of their vows however, it doesnât stick. Then the same goes for the other one. They go together or not at all. Death wonât part them. But maybe, just maybe, bound by a destiny carved by the dreams of children, Death can bring them back together.
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The idea being, the summoning circle for the Ghost King is not yet calibrated with clones in mind. So it summons Danielle instead.
Instead of correcting this misunderstanding, Dani doubles down and commits to the bit. Oh, where's the Crown of Fire? Ring? Why would she allow the likes of you to see that?
OR straight-faced, completely serious: Of course this green paper crown is the Crown of Fire, it's flammable. Of course the Ring of Rage looks like a normal skull ring, you haven't pissed me off yet.
Sam still didnât know where Dani was. Shit. She had been missing for almost a week. âI should have gotten her a phone,â Sam said. She sent a crying emoji.Â
âShe canât read,â Danny pointed out miserably. âIt didnât make sense for you to do that immediately. âYou didnât know she would run away.â
Tucker sent a series of crying emojis in the groupchat. âIâve got nothing from Vladâs emails,â he texted. âI donât think he knows where she is either. I donât think heâs looking.â
Danny sent an angry emoji face. Sam sent a vampire and then a bunch of guns. Danny sort of agreed with the sentiment.
Jazz sighed loudly, bringing his attention back to the real world enough that Danny noticed the sounds from the television.
âBeen buying him dog beds, dog jackets, the whole kit and caboodle,â Dick Grayson said on daytime television, hateful and fascinating despite Dannyâs best efforts to look away. The studio audience laughed. Danny didnât see what was funny about that. He watched resentfully as Dick somehow lounged even harder on Poprahâs big comfy sofa, preening under the approval of strangers. âBruce, on the other hand-â
Danny shut the TV off and tossed the remote across the room. He buried his face in his hands and let out a strangled scream.Â
Everything reminded him of that mess. It had been a horrible week.
âI really⌠What if Damian was telling the truth?â He modulated his breathing. âJazz was interested in keeping me safe. She would lie to keep me away from them to keep me safe from rodeo clowns and chemists. It made some sense. I am not smart enough to be a Fenton.â
âOh, look at this.â Jazz leaned against his side and flashed her phone in his face to show him a celebrity gossip article. âLook at Damian Wayne in his new suit this morning. Itâs Armani. What do you think thatâs for?âÂ
âStop,â Danny whined piteously. He felt so low. He was muck. He was a base and bad guy.
âHeâs got a tie on,â Jazz said. âLike a little gentleman.â
He opened one eye, still hidden behind his fingers.
âAnd I think he got⌠no, not a haircut, but it looks really different.â A frown came across in her voice. âIt reminds me of old photos of Dick Grayson.âÂ
He had to look. âHe does,â Danny breathed, reluctantly fascinated. Damian didnât really look like Dick, but you could see the influence. Would Danny look like Dick if he moved his part and added volume⌠He pulled his fingers out of his hair before Jazz could notice.Â
She was too busy frowning at her phone. âI do feel bad,â she muttered. Her socked feet flexed in the air and she grimaced. âDamian seems like a sweet boy. And heâs obsessed with you.â She cast a rueful look at Danny. He blinked back at her guilelessly. âHe would want you to go to school. I bet youâd get all the benefits of association with the family.â
âYeah.â Danny shrugged. âI bet they could get me a job in space.â He scratched at his face. âI might have to fight space crime, though.â Like a Green Lantern or something. Space bat? Would they make him a Space Bat? The unending vacuum of space sounded less scary than Gotham, to be fair, but he was more into the idea of exploration.
âYouâre not allowed to fight space crime until you have at least your first Doctorate,â Jazz warned. She shook a finger at him. âYou canât embarrass us in front of aliens.â
Danny just shrugged again. He was vaguely certain he was capable of embarrassing his family and race in front of literally any audience, but he didnât feel like fighting with Jazz right now.Â
Hey. He frowned and sat up straighter. âHey Jazz?â Danny asked. She was clutching at her stomach with one hand and frowning in distraction. âDo you feel like maybe youâre being slowly pulled through time and space?â
ââŚWhat?â Jazz blinked at him.Â
âJust saying.â Danny shrugged. The room bled green. âHmm.â He stood up. âJazz?â
She was staring at her hands. âWhat?â Jazz said, baffled, as she went intangible and fell a few inches from the sofa to the ground. She shrieked and Danny lurched to help her get her balance as the world around them went static and re-emerged as a circular room lined with dark benches.Â
âGood afternoon, helpless ghost infants,â greeted a skeleton in a guard uniform as Jazz scrambled to her feet and plastered herself to Dannyâs back. âYouâve been summoned to court.â He had a nametag written in a language that Danny didnât know. Dumbfounded, he stared around the room. It was huge, with high windows that let in vibrant green light. The center of the room was the lowest point. It sort of seemed like the bench where a judge would sit.
âI am not an infant!â Danny scowled. âI am 15 years old!â
The skeleton gave him a politely dubious look. âIs that so,â he said. He definitely didnât believe him. Danny sulked.
â...I am not a ghost,â Jazz said. âI am a living human.â She held her hands out. âLook at that, thatâs blood in my body. Not ectoplasm.â
The skeleton managed to frown slightly. He leaned forward and inhaled. â...Thatâs a mix. I see ectoplasm, ergo, you are a ghost.â He gestured forward with a hand. âHave a seat, proceedings are about to start.âÂ
âI have- what?â Jazz blinked rapidly. She made a gibberish sound.
âWhat?â Danny said. The room lit up with a faint glow as ghosts materialized into place in the stands. Jazz jumped out of her skin and grabbed at his arm. She stared around with wide eyes at the gallery of strangers.
Every one of them was looking at the two of them. Some of them had cameras and notebooks.
â...Should you maybe be Phantom?â she asked, very quietly.Â
Danny took it all in and transformed wordlessly.Â
âGreetings! You can call me Alcesta!â
Jazz shrieked and flung herself backwards, away from the grinning pumpkin-headed ghost who had greeted them.Â
The ghost looked taken aback by this reaction. She smoothed down the front of her Victorian-era gown and took a moment to compose herself before grinning down at them again. â...my apologies for startling you. Have a seat, ghostlings.â She gestured them to a seat towards the center. âIâll be your barrister today. If you have any questions or requests, direct them to me.â
âI have a question,â Danny said. âWhy am I here?â
âThatâs a fantastic query to start with, youâre doing wonderfully,â Alesta praised. She bullied him into a seat so fast his head was still spinning when she pointed across the room. âYour Father is suing for custody of you.â
â...No,â said Jazz, sounding lost.
âYes,â said Damian Wayne, wearing the little suit and tie that TMZ had snapped a photo of him in this morning. He gave them a weird little nod-bow thing. âI am sorry to undermine you, but your home environment is clearly unsafe. It would be irresponsible of me to leave you there.â
Jazz opened her mouth. She closed it without saying anything.
âPlease, sir,â Alesta shrilled. She held up a hand and blasted Damian back. Danny yelped. The preteen stumbled but caught himself without injury and sniffled loudly in affront. âYou may not approach the minors at this point in proceedings. Really!â Flustered, she sort of⌠ruffled. She turned back to them with a whisper. âThings arenât settled yet,â Alesta explained. She sort of sniffled. âDeadbeat parents are not guaranteed custody.â
â..He is not a deadbeat,â Danny defended weakly.Â
âOh?â Alesta raised an eyebrow. Why did she have an eyebrow on a carved pumpkin face?
âI ran away, he didnât leave me.â Danny lifted his shoulders in a half hearted attempt to hide. âHeâs just⌠Heâs not my father, thatâs all. I have a father already.â
Alestaâs mouth thinned out to a mere slit. âHmm,â she said, and turned away. âThe judge will be here soon.â
A gong rang out. Danny looked around for it.
It rang again.
Everyone else was seated. Jazz slowly sank down to the bench next to him, the last person standing in the entire room.
A skeleton in another guard uniform cleared their throat. âAll rise for his honor, chief justice of this court,â they announced.
âWe literally just sat down,â Danny thought, baffled, but he copied everyone else.
The ceiling blew open. Sort of. It unpeeled like a can and a miasma seeped inside. It was black and choking. It crawled and danced through the air and coalesced into a vaguely humanoid form at the empty bench in the middle of the auditorium.
âBe seated,â hissed the miasma. Something sparked.
They sat.
âThe first case on the docket is D. Wayne, suing the kingdom for emergency custody of minors,â announced the second skeleton. Damian nodded as heads turned to him. He looked totally unsurprised by this. Of course he was, Danny realized through his shock. Damian had planned this. âWayne has evidence to show the existence of consent to custody of the middle child, Phantom Danny. Wayne has physical custody of the youngest child, Phantom Dani. Wayne sues this court to grant full custody of all three Phantom kittens, who are represented by Barriest Alesta.â
âThree?â Jazz shrieked. âHeâs suing for custody of me? Iâm 17!â
âKittens!â Danny felt his jaw drop in outrage. âI am not a catb-â
âHi!â Dani chirped. âI love him!â She was right at his elbow, wagging her tail rapidly. She was also a dog with a human mouth.Â
Raven was wavering in her convictions, fearful just because Snitches was a living human. He had been abandoned. He must fight alone.
âI must contact the ghost protective agency again and start proceedings, with or without her assistance. And I much desire to see the catgirl.â
âDamian, we cannot give your brother custody of human children without his knowledge.â Ravenâs heels clacked on the sidewalk as she made her position clear.
Damian did not break his stride towards Secret and Superboyâs current location, but he mourned the loss of his partnership. âThere is no other choice,â he said stoically. âThe home is unsafe. You cannot deny this. They do not even have properly calibrated lasers or math tutors.â
Raven was hot on his heels. She began floating slightly in agitation. âOf course. But there are other options to explore, proper channels.â The words came out through gritted teeth. âAmerican child protective services for Danny, at least. The situation may be different if Dani has no legal identity...â
He respected her more for saying those heinous words. It was important to cover all the foundations. However-
âWe have already contacted the appropriate child protective services, you know it to be true.â
She was silent. âI donât like it,â Raven said. âThat boy in the Fenton house was alive. Literally alive. But he is also the same person as that ghost. I donât know how to square those facts. Supernatural things can be dangerous. Very dangerous.â She cut him a serious look and started walking on the ground again. Damian allowed her to stare him down to try to add weight to her point. âHe seems like a nice boy, but we donât know enough about the situation.â
Damian repressed a sneer. She was only concerned. It was⌠appropriate to her role. âSomething is very wrong,â Damian agreed. He indulged himself to pull out his cellular device and sent a curt message to his father to inform him that he knew he had kicked Snitches. Punishment would come swiftly.
âSuperboy messaged while we were inside,â Raven said, voice going distant. âHe and Secret drew the Fentons away across town. We need to check in on this extra-governmental agency thatâs been harassing them around town. And I believe they have located our mysterious clone.â She stopped and made uncomfortable eye contact. âYou absolutely may not adopt her to Dick for the time being. Do you agree? We need more information. Do not get her a legal human identity and adopt her to Dick.â
Damian stopped midstep. His phone still showed a half-finished message to Father, a threat trailing off. He thoughtlessly sent it as-was and put the phone away. âVery well.â He tried to sound as neutral as possible about this. âLet us go and rescue the children from ghost hunters and catgirls.â
Raven snorted. âVery kind of you.â She wiped her arms in a circle and a vent opened in the firmament for them to step into. Damian did not require prompting to step inside. He came out on the other end of Amity Park into a cloud of disgusting smoke.
âVile,â he observed, wrinkling his nose. Someone had recently deconstructed a van. A white bumper was abandoned on the pavement at the end of a trail of broken metal, catching sunlight. A wheel spun slowly on an axel that had been liberated from the task of transporting metal.
âItâs ass fault!â A child with a large scrape over her face cheerfully informed him. Her grin showed a missing front tooth, which was incredibly charming. âBurning ass fault!âÂ
Secret had her hands over her mouth to hide a giggle at an understandable mistake. How uncouth and perhaps even bigoted of her. He made a mental note that she must be punished at a later date and set his sights on the new child who had so happily reported to him.
Damian looked down at her crossed ankles, and noted the way she was bobbing in the air. âYou must be Dani,â he said, holding out a hand. âI am Dannyâs father, Damian.â Her scruffy hair moved as she cocked her head to the side in confusion. She had human ears. Hmm.Â
âHm.â She looked at his hand mistrustfully. âAre you evil?â
Superboy made a so-so gesture with his hand and scrunched his face up. Secret smacked him on the back of the head, but Jon was not entirely incorrect.
âNot anymore,â Damian answered honestly. He drew back his hand, as it was obvious she did not want to shake or sniff it. âI was raised in an ecoterrorist assassination conglomerate, but I have since repented.â
âSo you donât have an evil lab in your basement?â she confirmed. Her eyes narrowed. âAnd arenât you small for Dannyâs Dad?â She was open in her suspicion. Very charming indeed.
âI have a lab in my basement, but it is not evil. Would you like to come and see it?â He ignored the sound someone made. âAnd I am small, but he was smaller than this when we met. He was smaller than you, in fact.â He looked her up and down. She looked to be perhaps⌠seven years of age?
Dani let out a surprised laugh. âHe was smaller than me?â
Behind her, Raven drifted over to begin conferring with Jon and Secret in low tones. Damian loftily ignored their plotting and returned to coaxing his child home. He did not need to involve Richard in this venture! Dani was wholly unclaimed.
Damian kept his tone mild. âI have his first pawprint impression in this book.â He withdrew the scrapbook from inside his jacket. âWould you like to take a look?â
It transpired that Dani did desire to see this evidence. She laid her own hand against the paw print and giggled. âItty bitty,â Dani crooned.Â
âDani,â Damian said casually.
Everyone turned to look at him.Â
Perhaps he did not say it casually enough. He rallied regardless and kept his tone mild.
âDo you think that you could become a cat? Danny can become a cat.â
She stared at him for a moment and then shook her head. âIf he can do it, so can I,â Dani declared. She tossed her hair. âI was created to have all of his abilities and more!â She settled into a strange stance with tight fists and wide feet. âGoing cat!â Her entire face scrunched up in concentration.
Nothing happened.
She turned a little red.
Nothing continued to happen. It was a shame. It would have been easier to take her home if she had a feline form.
âHmm.â Damian did not sigh. âPerhaps you are too young-â
âGot it!â Dani shook her sleeve down to reveal not a hand, but a paw! A darling speckled paw! He clapped once.
âWhoa.â Secret drifted closer, fascinated and disgusted. âWhy can you do that? I donât think I can do that. Are ghosts supposed to be able to do that?â
Dani sniffled and twitched her nose. It was turning black gradually. âIf Danny can do it, so can I,â she repeated.Â
âA solid hypothesis,â Damian praised her. âYou are very clever, Dani.â He adjusted his stance to look over her better. His heart raced with excitement. âThis does not cause you any discomfort, does it?â
Her expression fell to a curious blankness. She was silent for a long moment. âNo. It doesnât hurt.â Dani shook her hands again and began to shrink. Her jaw was tight with obvious tension.Â
Damian hovered and observed with fascination as she shrank in size. Her ears migrated up her skull and curled into a new shape. âYou are a marvel,â he praised. âYour ears are perfect. You have such an elegant coat. I see you have kept your blue eyes for a striking effect.â
âThatâs a dog,â Jon observed. Secret slapped at him to silence him.
âA what?â said Dani in a human voice from the muzzle of, yes, a dog. âIâm a cat, right? Four feet, tail? Iâve seen this kind of thing around a few times. A cat.â She lifted a clawed paw pointedly. âUm, cockadoodle doo?â
âThey are essentially the same thing,â Damian lied smoothly. He knelt in front of her. âMay I touch your head?â
â...Donât melt me,â said Dani. Her little body was tight with nerves.
âWe will have to kill Mr. Masters. How unfortunate. I will have to contact Mother or worse, Todd.â
Mental note set aside, Damian set to work on gently petting his new child. Dani was stiff at first, but he could read her body language well enough to know that she wanted desperately to press herself against his hands and receive parental attention. He was so focused on his new child that he hardly noticed the sound of approaching footsteps and the huffing of a civilian.
âHave you seen a little girl?â A goth teenager sweated bullets onto the sidewalk. âMy, uh, little sister.â
âNo, sorry,â Raven said, deflecting the civilian away.
Damian smoothed down Daniâs ears. She didnât even seem to notice the teenager take a few bracing breaths and then resume her run down the road, desperately searching for her sister. He spared a moment to wish her well, but he could not afford to help every wretch in middle America. As a parent, he simply had to prioritize.
Dani began to purr. Her whole chest vibrated with it.Â
âMost excellent.â
âAlright, I have seen enough,â Raven said. âRemember what we agreed?âÂ
âYes, of course,â Damian agreed. âHe is uninvolved with young Dani for now.â
Raven made a sound of disagreement but turned away.Â
âIâll look into those two leads. Come and see me tomorrow. I think we might need to infiltrate the GIW facility.â She waved a hand at Dani. âI donât need to know anything more about this,â she said, and stepped away into a portal. âSuperboy, can you get him home? Thanks.âÂ
âWait for me!â Secret lunged to fit into Ravenâs portal back to Titanâs Tower.Â
âHmm.â Jon crossed his arms and bobbed in the air a bit, watching Damian parent with fascination. âI didnât expect that youâd come home with a kid, but this is a natural escalation of what you were already doing. Maybe even a genetic inevitability.â He ignored the rapidly building irritation from both Damian and Dani as he locked his hands behind his head and mused foolishly. âI guess she might love patrolling with you,â he shrugged. âShe ran out into traffic when she saw Secret to start a figh- ow!â He shrieked and flailed away from Daniâs teeth, which were needle-sharp. Damian felt a swell of paternal affection. What a clever modification to the body of a Siberian husky. The teeth were better when sharper and longer.
âI bit you before and Iâll bite you again,â Dani warned, feet splayed out for a good solid base to attack from. âI didnât start that fight, I just finished it. She was on my turf!â Her tail stood straight up, much like that of a feline. How precious.
âYou bite?â Damian said, thinking that over. Well. Of course she did. Babies bit. He knew this fact. And she ran into traffic? Boldness was admirable, of course, but she had to be taught some caution. School was a troubling barrier, but there would surely be some sort of boarding school that would accept her. âBut of course I would not oppose her if she chose to patrol with me. In fact, I had begun training with Danny on cooperative maneuvers. Would you like to use a dartgun?â
Dany stared up at him with her uncanny blue husky eyes. âBoy, would I ever. Do I need some kind of license for that? Also, what is a dart gun?â
Damian was startled into a laugh. âNo, of course not,â he assured her. âI will, of course, have to enroll you in an educational institution to demonstrate that I am taking proper care of you. Once you have finished your courses, I will personally teach you to use any weapons that you desire.â He paused and considered how to describe the concept. âA dart gun is a mechanism for launching a very small needle or blade at high speed. It may be combined with poisons and chemicals to interesting effect. I have a few design concepts for combining it with a feline theme that I may begin to modify to suit you.â
â....Yeah,â Dani said, in response to some silent internal debate. âYou can be my Dad.â
Rachel stopped for a moment in the doorway and looked at the ghost-patterned wall paper and throw pillows. âThatâs really⌠on theme.âÂ
Danny and Jazz shrugged. âItâs visual white noise to me,â she said. âHave a seat, be careful of that light, though.â She pointed at the hanging light over the sofa, which never bothered Danny because he wasnât tall enough to hit his head on it. He scowled a bit about it as he slunk to the armchair next to the sofa. When was it going to be his turn to get a growth spurt? It was like he wasnât even a Fenton. He was short and he was dumb as a rock. He sulked a bit.
Something crunched when Rachel sat down on the sofa. She froze and then reached underneath her leg. She withdrew a broken potato chip. âIs this yours?â she asked dryly.
Danny reached out and took it to be polite. âThanks.â He considered it for a moment and then ate it, because Jazz was already using her scary face on him, he was caught. âBreakfast,â he explained philosophically. There would be a lecture later. He licked the salt off his fingers and then flung his legs over the side of his chair.Â
Damian looked like he was in actual pain. âI have been concerned for your welfare,â he said delicately. âYou might realize that I feel a duty of care for you, as well as a certain concern.â
Danny grimached. âThat makes sense!â He wriggled his way into the seat a little further. âUm, I probably should have said something before I left. I apologize.â
âNone is needed.â
âHow did you find him, though?â Jazz pressed. She had her pleasant face on, but Danny knew her well enough to see that she was tense.Â
âBy the utilization of closed circuit cameras, I was able to confirm that Sni-Danny boarded a bus at the Gotham Depot to a center in Chicago and transferred there to a bus that went to Amity Park.â Damian inclined his head at Raven. âI was able to receive more specific information from my associate, here.â
â...She just looks like a normal goth loser,â Danny said doubtfully. She dressed like Sam, and that was really uncool for an adult. âWhat, did she do a ouiji board reading or something?â
âSomething like that.â Rachel gave him a sharp smile.Â
âI knew from the start, of course, that you were no mundane feline,â Damian assured him. The words came out in a practiced rush. âThe supernatural nature of your arrival in Gotham city seemed to confirm that Amity was your origin, given the environment here. So I have sought you out to take you home, to safety.â
That was touching and scary.
âRight.â Danny said slowly. âThatâs impressive.â He cleared his throat, uncomfortable. âBut as you can see, that was a fluke. I am actually a human boy, in good health.â He held out his hands to demonstrate that they were not paws.
Damian stared at him a long time. âDanny,â he said gently. âWhen you came to us, you had worms.â His large green eyes were wounded, as if he felt pain for Danny and his worms.
Rachel startled and smacked her head on the floating ghost pendant light that was over the sofa.Â
While she cursed, Jazz sniffled. âI admit that the lasers do not inspire confidence,â she said piously. Danny rolled his eyes.Â
Damian cut her off. âThe lasers would be acceptable if they were calibrated appropriately,â Damian said. It was positively scathing. His face was a little thundercloud, screwed up with violent disdain. âThey should never endanger residents. I would never allow such a thing in Wayne Manor.â
âUnfortunately, it really isnât your business.â
Everyone looked at Jazz. She had her haughty face on, the one that said, âI was a varsity cheerleader for two years until I decided I had better things to do. Please understand how far above you I am.â
(maybe Danny projected meaning into that a little)
âYou are an elementary school student. I checked. Although I have to say I am impressed with your published paper about igneous rock. It is extremely commendable that you got published in an academic journal at age 10. I didnât get published until I was 15.â The worst thing was that she was so sincere. âYou cannot adopt Danny, even though you adopted him as a cat, because a child cannot enroll another child into school. And Danny has to go to school,â she said firmly.
âYes!â Damian looked sort of scarily intense. He leaned forward, eyes glinting.
âThe situation is not what we thought,â Rachel said in an undertone. âMaybe we should talk about this, Damian.âÂ
He looked at her and then clearly disregarded her. âDanny will not be adopted by me,â he said stubbornly.
âDamian, please.â Rachel looked stressed.Â
âHe will live with his real father, Dick Wayne,â Damian announced triumphantly. âIt will not surprise anyone to discover that he had a secret child with a bewitching redheaded woman with far more education than he. Danny will live in Bludhaven and have the best tutors, and I will visit him every day to apply flea shampoo and care for his nails.â Damian clenched his hands into fists as he vowed.
Danny fell off his chair with a thump and hit his head on the carpet. âWhat?â It came out as a squawk.
Jazzâs mouth fell open. âThatâs ridiculous,â she sputtered.
âIs that why Iâm not good at science?â Danny vaulted up, eyes wild. He felt his hair flying around his head with static. âAnd why Iâm weedy and weak?â He rolled up a sleeve to jab at his arm demonstratively. âLook at me, Jazz, it makes sense! Iâm not strong or smart like a Fenton, and itâs because of Dick Wayneâs genetics!â He fell back down, shocked. He stared at the ceiling in disbelief.Â
âYes, thatâs it.â Jazz put both of her hands on her face, voice heavy with sarcasm. âDick Wayne is responsible for your failing grades in math, not that you sleep 4 hours a night and eat garbage and never study.â
Oh. Fuck. Danny felt his eyes widen as he put together a puzzle. âIs that whatâs wrong with Dani?â he asked. âVlad was expecting-â
He cut himself off. Everyone else had a pained expression because they thought he was speaking in the third person. âNot me, Danny with a Y,â he explained. âDani with an i, my semi-successful clone made by Vlad Masters to replace me.â
â...with Vlad?â Jazz looked disgusted. âVlad made himself a child? He is not parenting material.â
âAnother?â Damian said sharply. âThere is another baby?â He looked at Rachel urgently.
âYeah, sheâs like 3 days old now. Vlad kicked her out yesterday,â Danny explained distantly. Oh, man, it was all coming together now. "That's why she's so flippy!"Â
Jazz let out a long sigh. âThis is ridiculous,â she snapped. âDanny, theyâre lying. And they can get out of our house.â She put her hands on her hips. âDick Grayson is not your Father, you are not dumb, and Dani did not inherit acrobatic tendencies from anyone but you. Youâre a cheerleader.â That last bit came out positively scathing.
âA male cheerleader,â Danny clarified quickly.
âYes, I assumed so,â Rachel said. She looked like she had a headache.Â
âI will support you no matter what subtype of cheerleader you are,â Damian said stubbornly.Â
Jazz took a deep inhalation. âI respect that it has nothing to do with you as a person, and I believe you are as qualified for cat ownership as anyone else,â she told him. âBut I am not trusting the Wayne family with my little brother.â
Danny blinked at her. Damian looked confused for the first time in their acquaintance.Â
âBecause of Jason Todd,â she said, raising her eyebrows and dipping her chin pointedly.
Danny looked at everyoneâs face. âYou said that like we would understand it.â
He said that at the same time that Damian said, âUnderstandable, I will keep them apart.â
âBruce Wayneâs first adopted child, who died under extremely suspicious circumstances!â Jazz full-on scowled. Then she blinked as she processed what Damian had said. âWait. What?â
âOh, he is dead,â Damian said, as if he had just remembered this information. He cleared his throat. âNo ill fate shall befall Danny,â he said. âI will cut the hamstrings of his enemies.â
Danny thought speculatively about Dash Baxter. He raised his hand to ask a question.
âNo, Danny,â Jazz said.
He put his hand down, but Danny had to argue. âHe put my head in a toilet this week. Thatâs the action of someone who might not deserve hamstrings.âÂ
âThatâs unfortunate. Nevertheless.â Jazz cleared her throat. âEver since I realized that you got turned into a cat and stole Tim Drake-Wayneâs phone, I have been looking into the family.â
âTablet,â Danny corrected. âI used his tablet.â
Rachel put a hand on her chin and just watched. She looked incredibly old and tired, like, at least 36.
âI found a forum that talks about the mystery, and I have seen some very convincing information,â Jazz continued. âI am not convinced that Bruce Wayne is not responsible. I am sorry.â She rounded on Danny, and she was genuinely apologetic. âI canât allow you to get adopted by anyone who might have allowed via incompetence their child to get murdered by a rodeo clown.â
âHe is not a-â Damian cut off his outrage and took an extremely audible inhalation.
Danny put his hands up. âHey, we donât need to be hostile.â He felt his shoulders hunch up. âMr. Wayne seemed alright,â he said vaguely. âHe did kick me the once, but I think it was incompetence- oh, thatâs the thing you said,â Danny said, realization dawning as soon as he said the word. He frowned. âHm. Did that support your point?â
âHe what,â said Damian. He went white with fury. âExcuse me. I need to make a call.â
âYou two can just leave,â Jazz firmly said. She stood up to usher them out. âThank you for checking in on Danny, but itâs time for you to go.â
Richard pulled up another file. Two adults in lurid HAZMAT suits waved from the photo. "Meet Jack and Madeline Fenton â Danny Fenton's adoptive parents."
Damian eyed the suits, the goggles, and the futuristic weaponry attached to their hips. "Are they mad scientists?"
"Yep."
"Is the liquid some variation of Lazarus Water?"
"Constantine says it's the original source."
"...How sure are we that Danyal isn't deep in a long term cover?"
Richard grimaced. Behind them, the sound of tinkering paused.
"We aren't."
demon twins has so much potential for misunderstandings and angst
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Hardison studies accessibility options!!!!! Parker and Eliot need very similar options - simple interfaces, big buttons, clear directions, non-saturated colors! He makes his tech easy to use! Touchscreen interface Yes Please because typing frigging hurts (source: shitty hands with loose joints)!
But! More than that!
Captions are Always On for their media - Parker has audio processing issues and Eliot has tinnitus and Hardison likes to read because it helps him stay focused on the media!
Grab bars next to all toilets/in all showers and tubs! Plus shower chairs that can be stowed away!
Parker has sensory corners everywhere - in the vents, a cocoon up in the ceiling, in a few closets, and in the main room!
Electric hot pads, rice bags, and ice packs are Always within reach! Weighted blankets on every couch! (Plus afghans from Nana)
Voice controls!!! Homebrew of course, but all the lights and stuff are set to respond to voice commands (locked to vocal signature) that vary based on the person! If Eliot makes a Very Distinctive Grunt the lights dim bc he has a migraine!!!!!
Ergonomic handles! None of those round doorknobs, levers Only!
Sound cancelling headphones are scattered for when the World is Too Much for Parker!
Fidget and stim toys all over the place for when Hardison or Parker need them! (Some make noise ans some dont)
BACK TO THE HEADPHONES some of them are Bluetooth enabled! So if Eliot needs quiet and Parker needs loud she can put them on and blast music and Eliot hears nothing! Also good for watching movies together with the sound off if someone (Eliot) has finally fallen asleep but the movie is good!
Blue blocker film on Every Screen Ever!
Perfectly sized furniture! The counters are the right height so that a certain Punch Small Man doesnt strain himself!
So like, I was vibing - and then an idea struck me. As all things do.
And then I realized, Danny is the King of ALL Ghosts. So now as I sat there with this revelation, I have come to the realization that - why haven't we summoned up to a bunch of other ghosts from other media, for at least either a cameo or a crackfic?
Y'see, I was listening to a beautiful remix of Luigi's Mansion and then seeing the artwork of King Boo, I just thought - when Danny was crowned King of Ghosts, all kinds of Ghosts showed up?
Ghosts do what they want and what they please (good or evil, what does it matter?), but at the end of the day, most of them look after each other. So when news of Danny being captured by GIW happens, I just had the most stupidest thought.
King Boo, despite being all evil and jazz, kinda appreciates Phantom. So finding out he was captured, set him off - because damnit, he knows what it's like to be captured and trapped in shit for YEARS.
Que King Boo, Master of Illusions, Slayer of the Infinite, and the guy who managed to kidnap Mario THREE TIMES - showing up and immediately wrecking the GIW Base to rescue the Boy King.
And because I can, DPXDC in it as well.
Danny runs off with Gotham, with King Boo and his own army of Boos with them, and things go your usual DPXDC Crossover. Except now they're more mischief because this place is TEEMING with hauntedness, so now Boos are going around pranking people - and scaring the shit out of them,
Meanwhile after the jumpscare, everyone sits there like, "Was that a fucking Boo?"
Because now there's TWO GHOST KINGS in Gotham. And Danny is liking King Boo, and vice versa. Not exactly a mentorship, but more like, "We ride, and we died. So now we keep riding."
Itâs very telling about the kind of roles Christian Kane is cast in that I thought this was a legit subtitle for a minute and couldnât tell if it was Leverage or The Librarians (outside chance it was Angel, honestly).Â
*pokes you* Make it fic for me, Sam. If not now, then next time youâre doing a Midnight Theatre. Iâm putting my order in now because I am NEVER awake when you ask for prompts. Pretty please?
Guess whoâs got legal weed and a will to create!Â
(Quick shout out to Dispensary 33, where 1920s facial hair meets 2020s weed edibles!)
Title: A Very Distinctive Backstitch
Rating: General
Summary: Parker returns home to find Eliot has discovered both pinterest and handicrafts, and Hardison has had to use the fire extinguisher again.
Parker got home three days after the boys did, on that particular mission. When they were planning it, they seemed to think this wasnât fair, and sheâd told them they were right; she felt terrible, having so much fun without them. Still, theyâd just have to keep a stiff upper lip about it and sheâd let them have all the fun next time.
(When she mentioned that, Alec got his âYou have misunderstood my intentionsâ face, but she lâŚshe loâŚshe loved Alec in part because even when she didnât understand, he wasnât ever mean or judgey. He didnât always explain, but he always accepted. In this case, he just got her a GoPro so she could tape herself on the stunt bike course during the mission.)
Anyway, she spent three days having so much fun, and didnât even mind the long drive back to Portland in the taquito truck. But when she finally arrived home, letting herself into the loft above the brewpub, she was met with a mystery. As she entered she found, draped over the kitchen island, a large fold of cloth, heavily embroidered in the style of the Bayeaux tapestry.
âDid you take an entire other job without me?â she demanded, as Alec walked into the kitchen carrying an empty plastic takeaway container. He shouted, flailed, and threw it at her. She caught it and tossed it into the sink. (She was all for throwing them away, but Eliot got a really pinched look when they did that, so now they washed them and saved them forever in the Sacred Take Away Container Reliquary, aka the bottom drawer on the right of the dishwasher.)
âParker!â Alec yelped.
âWhat kind of job would you need the Bayeaux tapestry for, anyhow?â she asked.
âWoman,â Alec sighed, but he hugged her, and once sheâd gotten used to them hugs were nice, so she enjoyed that part. âWelcome home. Itâs not the Bayeax tapestry. I have some bad news.â
âIf youâre getting some 7535 you might as well grab the 7110!â Eliotâs voice drifted out from the bedroom.
âEliotâs lost his damn mind,â Hardison finished.
In theory, Parker knew that this job would be rough on Eliot. It required their hitter to take a beating. Eliot had said he was fine with it, but heâd taken more of a hit than anyone (possibly including the bad guysâ goon) had intended. In practice sheâd been prepared for him to be bedridden, doped up, and cranky, but she hadnât been prepared for cryptography.
âWhatâs 7535?â she asked in a whisper.
âEmbroidery thread,â Hardison replied, reaching for a plastic bin on the counter. He held up a hank of wooly yarn, wrapped in a piece of paper that did indeed read 7535. âDid you know there are seven different shades of black?â
âWell, yeah,â she said, perplexed. âI mean, Venetian Black is totally different from Cherry Black, and then thereâs Dark Black â oh! I found it!â she added, plucking the other color, 7110, out of the box. âWhat does Eliot want with red and black yarn?â
âThread. Embroidery thread,â Alex said. âHe got high and picked up a hobby.â
At that point Eliot himself, apparently impatient with Alecâs lack of speed, thumped into the kitchen on a crutch.
âItâs not a hobby, itâs a historical tradition,â he said. âHi Parker, welcome home. Textiles have always been dismissed as crafts while paint and sculpture are arts,â he added, aggrieved.
Parker turned to Alec. He shrugged.
âHe found a really compelling Pinterest right as the opiates kicked in,â he said.
âI learned how to embroider at three in the morning,â Eliot said to her proudly. He held out his next project after the fake Bayeaux tapestry. It was a cross stitch announcing All Cheese is Hubris. Parker studied it, impressed.
âHe also almost burned the building down,â Alec interjected, as if he wasnât used to both of them almost burning things down on a very regular basis. It was cute how he always acted surprised.
âItâs a long story,â Eliot said. âAnyway once I got the hang of it, I thought, Iâve never forged a textile before.â
âOoh, me neither,â Parker said thoughtfully.
âBut thereâs a couple of panels from the Bayeaux missing, right?â he continued. âAnd likeâŚwhy shouldnât one of the missing panels have aliens in it?â
Parker checked the tapestry on the kitchen island. Among other more traditional motifs, it did indeed have two large-eyed aliens abducting a monk.
âHeâs still high?â she asked.
âAnother two days on the Vicodin,â Alec confirmed.
âIt looks very authentic,â she said loyally. âConstruction-wise, I mean.â
âThanks,â Eliot said. He accepted the thread Alec handed him. âIâm gonna go finish this one. Itâs for the kitchen.â
He hobbled off. Alec looked at her, his face a careful mask.
âPoor baby,â she said. âI got to base-jump twice and youâve been tripsitting him through the hobby store.â
âART STORE,â Eliotâs voice drifted out from the bedroom.
âYeah, well, you know, itâs been rough, but I held up,â Alec said, putting on a mock-brave face. She grinned and kissed his cheek.
âGo play some video games. Iâll handle him from here. With a little nudge, he might learn to knit before we have to get him off the hard stuff,â she pointed out. She felt the benefits of knitting were self-evident, but Alec frowned.
âWhy do we want Eliot to learn to knit?â he asked.
âHello? Custom sized winter hats?â she pointed out. Hardison fell well within the one-size-fits-all range of most machine knitted hats â sheâd done measurements while he slept â but she just knew if he had a tailored toque heâd feel better about wintering somewhere it rained every single day from Halloween to St. Patrickâs Day. She herself had quite an oval head and hadnât gone back to off-the-rack hats since her first tailored ski mask.
âIâm gonna goâŚGoose Game,â he said.
âBe extra horrible for me!â she told him, and bounced off to initiate a subtle campaign to shift Eliot from embroidery to knitting.
Phantom, weak after his escape from the GIW hides in Gotham. He has shrunken his ghost form to try and absorb the ambient ecto more efficiently but it isn't enough to. He will have to revert to his core so he looks for the best hiding place and finds it in the funny looking plush. He settles inside the doll and waits to fall into his core except he doesn't fully fall. He is getting enough ecto, but as long as he doesn't try to use his powers, he can move the doll around even if it's more uncontrolled rolling. He is practiging this when he hears foot steps.
And that's all I got because Danny in Fatson Todd can be:
The batfam mascot that is believed to bring good luck (bullets ricocheted when Steph had the doll in her room) so everyone is stealing him.
The haunted doll that nobody believes is haunted because even Duke says it's normal. Duke did see a ghost but after ensuring Danny wasn't malicious, he enabled the prank because Dick stole his cookie and Alfred didn't make a large batch so he missed out.
Damien's 'imaginary' friend that then ends up saving them and proven real
The Justice league facing a big baddie think they are screwed because Constantine is summoning the ghost king.
Zatanna: our odds aren't looking good but how can you think they will be better with the ghost king?
Constantine: he's been deposed and I got an in with the new guy
Danny: what up step dude
Zatanna: step dude?
Danny: yeah. Stepfather is too formal and I already have a dad so step dude
Wonder Woman: how did you get Pandora's blessing?
Danny: is that what that is? I'll have to give her something nice for mother's day. She says hi btw, very proud of her niece so maybe I can get your autograph and make that part of her gift.
The in is Clockwork. I love it when Danny gets a ghost dad and his messy bf to train him. That is good good stuff
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So I imagine that as SQH increases in value to MBJ, MBJ just like starts leaving robes and what not in the An Ding colors. SQH is like yay, free shit, like any good millennial. QQQ is peeved because SQH is like saying no to increases in clothing budgets or whatever and decides sheâs going to audit the books. She looks everywhere but SQH hasnât spent money on clothes in years.
Sheâs like is he taking bribes and investigates that but while she finds shady dealings, none are associated with SQH. QQQ is going slowly insane, because she cannot unravel the mystery and all SQQ will do is flutter his fan and mic drop âsugar daddyâ.
masterpost there will be man mixed up words, brain fog is real, please no edits <3
It was 6:55 and Jason was standing at Dannyâs door, bottle of wine in hand and dressed down as much as Red Hood could be.
It felt wrong.
Danny swung open the door before Jason could dwell too deeply on it. His crop top rose high as he leaned on the door, showing a sliver of tan skin that Jason wanted to run his fingers along. âHey there.â
âHey,â Jason said and then floundered for a moment before he just held out the bottle of wine. âNot sure if this goes with what youâre cooking tonight, but if not, you can have it another time.â
âThatâs sweet, thank you,â Danny said as he took the bottle with a little smile. âCome on in. Dinner still needs a little bit, but we can get this open to enjoy.â
Jason nodded even though Danny was already turned away. He was so quick to show Jason his back. Only after making sure the door was secured did Jason move on. His fingers twitched, wanting to check over the rest of the security of Dannyâs apartment. He took a breath and let it out slowly.
âAll the windows and stuff are covered if you want to take off your mask,â Danny called from the kitchen. âNot even a laptop open.â
Itâs easier to listen to Danny and remove his mask than it should be.
Easier to want to be Jason than it should be.
âWill you be going out after this?â Danny asked from the kitchen.
âMaybe. Probably,â Jason said. He hadnât really thought about it. Going out as Red Hood was just who he was.
âMaybe that depends on how long I keep your enchanting company around?â
âMaybe. The night is young, though,â Jason said. He accepted the glass from Danny and gave the wine a little swirl. He hadnât seen Danny pour it. He knew the bottle was safe, as he brought it, but he hadnât seen Danny pour it. He should have gone to the kitchen to watch.
âTo the young night then,â Danny said. He clinked their glasses in toast before taking a sip of his own. He held out his glass with raised brows. âThis is good.â
Jason gave an offended noise. âYou think Iâd bring bad wine?â
Danny just shrugs, unconcerned. He moved to sit down, folding elegantly onto his couch. âI just didnât expect it to be the kind of thing you paid attention to.â
âI⌠maybe had some help,â Jason admits. He glances from Danny to his wineglass.
âOh, shit. Shit. Iâm sorry, Hood,â Danny said. He got up, more speed than elegance now, and left his glass on the coffee table. âHere, Iâll take your glass for dinner. Or I can pour it back in the bottle and then drink from a fresh glass to show itâs safe? I shouldnât have just poured it in the kitchen like that.â
Jason⌠he doesnât know what to say to that. To Dannyâs concerned offer.
Danny smiled, sadly, and reached out. One hand took the glass of wine. The other reached out and brushed over Jasonâs brow. âYouâre so expressive like this, without your mask and your hood.â
âI, um,â Jason cleared his throat. âJust you thought of that so quicklyâŚâ
âComes with the job,â Danny says, short words ending that line of questioning quickly. âWhat would make you feel safe enough to drink the wine?â
âI trust you,â Jason answers with a frown.
âYou wouldnât be here if you didnât, but that doesnât mean that your brain feels safe. What would make you feel safe?â
Jason actually thought about that. Danny gave Jason the time to think about that. âI⌠pouring it back into the bottle would work, I think.â
âOkay. Come on, come to the kitchen with me.â Danny hooked his fingers in Jasonâs and moved them forward with a little tug.
With them both in the kitchen, Danny carefully poured the wine back into the bottle. He gave it a good swirl before pouring a fresh glass, which he toasted Jason with before taking a sip. Jason huffed out a little, half laugh at Dannyâs dramatic flair about it all. But it did help. Jason took the glass from Dannyâs graceful fingers and drank.
âNext time, Iâll remember,â Danny said.
âNext time?â Jason asked instead of dwelling on the hangups of his own brain any longer.
âOf course next time. This could be a thing, if you want it to be. I mean, with our schedules it will have to be a flexible sort of thing, but it could still be a thing.â
Jason tilted his head. âI⌠yeah, Iâd like that, this being a thing.â
Dannyâs smile was a luminous thing. (It made Jason feel a little heady.)