Bork!

so there's a natural order to this world and we need atleast four million mans in boots with armor, vehicles, and firearms to enforce it, otherwise something unnatural might happen

Coyotes trying their damndest to get domesticated

There are multiple chapters that are set in hospitals where the characters are attempting to recover from injuries that never fully heal. I must once again stress that my experience in WWI was perfectly normal.

There is a giant horrible mudplain full of unrecoverable and perfectly preserved dead bodies that the characters have to walk through in a land where the air is poisoned gas, and on a compLETELY UNRELATED NOTE: WWI WAS TOTALLY FINE AND NORMAL!!

undiagnosed autistic people will be like "I don't get upset when my routine changes though!!" and it's because they've built a set of if-then loops in their head to pick from one of 6 different strict routines and they do get incredibly upset when they're unable to keep to any of the 6 scripts. I'm john normal

Was just thinking about this the other day. Yeah I have a favorite seat on the bus (middle of the bus, near the back doors, slightly elevated, facing forward), but I don’t get upset if someone is already sitting there, I just pick one of my other favorite spots. Then I realized that most people probably don’t have a favorite bus seat, let alone a series of backup favorites.

the sewing machine is like if a horse and an inkjet printer had a child

one time I told my therapist "I tend to have issues with people who think of themselves as authority figures" and she burst out laughing and then said "I think we need to pause and reflect on how you phrased that"

I mean, what, was I supposed to refer to them as if they actually are authority figures? those don't exist

y'all are doing some weird discourse on this post. no that therapist doesn't need to be "investigated" lmao. she didn't say I was wrong, she reacted because the phrasing was specific as fuck and revealed a lot about my worldview which is totally reasonable to want to explore.

I’ve never seen the second photo before.

it sucks cuz my fave ben & jerry ice cream has a pic of jimmy fallon on it. the tonight’s dough. it’s so good though. but i hate having him in my house. i hate seeing his little cuck face in the store. i legit turn the container around when i store it in the freezer to minimize face to face time. whenever i’m gonna buy some i tell my sister “i’m going to get the little cuck cream at the store” and she knows what i mean

i abs0lut3ly h4t3 th3 w4y y0u phr4as3d “little cuck cream”

i are what i eat

you have made this post infinitely worse. blocked.

fuck dude you stunned them into regular speak instead of homestuck roleplay

I'm very very glad that my knee-jerk, gut-feeling, primal-instinct reaction to seeing a Default Influencer is embarrassment. I think this saves me from a lot of bullshit.

To be clear ☝️, absolutely not gender-exclusive. Some broccoli-haired shirtless 23-year-old man on enough trenbolone to euthanize a different horse starts talking about how to be a high-value male and I start thinking instantly about how I'd have 4,000 slugs use me as a jungle-gym before I'd want this man within cootie-contagion distance of me.

Respect for my soldiers… she’s saving him… the hons…