BRAVE / HEART

VENTUREHEART. A study in how love, rage, sorrow and instincts can immortalise and doom you all at once. A heavily canon divergent, racebent portrayal of Clara Oswald from Doctor Who. Written by Feegle (29, they/them, GMT). Highly selective and mutually exclusive. Crossover and OC friendly. 18+ only.

CARRD RP PROMPTS HEADCANONS

Rocket is a golden retriever and was found as a puppy by Howie in the early days of Clara living with him and Josh in her UNIT verse. Clara took to him so quickly despite some initial hesitation. He would spend a good amount of time in her room, acting like a weighted toy and later pretty much a blanket. She took him with her during the disbandment years, and he's ended up as something of a demidog after an incident during the Sontaran incursion. When they came back to the UK once UNIT was reinstated, he was delighted to have more dogs to play with and is still with Clara to this day

Clara's dreams are a big mixture, and she often struggles to remember them. Sometimes they're ordinary dreams, sometimes she dreams of Danny or her family, sometimes they're more intermingled with her trauma. Sometimes though, they're a bit more salient; dreams of her echoes' lives, dreams about her believers. They tend to linger a bit more. She writes those down sometimes, in locked notebooks that she keeps under her bed. They serve as some kind of a reminder of why she keeps going in the first place.

I think Clara struggles with the sense of home after her resurrection, or more accurately the lack thereof. It kills her that she can never go home again, in the physical and in the emotional sense. Her flat is emptied, put up for sale, a couple of bits salvaged for her to keep but not all of it. Her family need to keep believing that she's dead, so she can't see them either. She has visited her gran a couple of times, near the end of her life to provide them both some comfort

It's part of the reason why she's so restless, flits through the stars so often that she can hardly be seen. Even when she truly loves and is drawn to Maeve Donovan ( @lookedinfinite ) , she gets scared of making herself too at home in her life, runs away so often until their daughters start to come along. She is then faced with the responsibility as well as the love, and finds a way to manage the restlessness while still being there for her new family

It's easier in her UNIT verse, surrounded by people who know her and care about her, and she makes her home in the flat that her, Howie and Josh share along with Rocket. She keeps Earth at least as her home then, just kind of escaping the UK during the disbandment but coming back when UNIT is reinstated, probably in a nice house somewhere

Sgrjiojr Sans that's CHEATING but ok just for you 💖💖💖

1) At first, Clara still has a human body after her resurrection, and it takes her a bit of time before she is able to manage the true form of Kali bleeding through to reality. At first the shadow of Kali can be seen around her, her voice is weird, things like that, but she learns how to rein this in with time. As time goes on the physical forms of both therefore become more complex, more fused than in the beginning when they are almost still two separate forms. This is primarily because Clara is still very self sacrificial, and each death and injury compromises her body a bit more. Her human body eventually becomes more of a projection, and she really becomes a form of Kali not just in the spiritual sense, but in the physical sense too

2) Sort of related to the prior one but Clara feels funny to others after her resurrection. As in when engaging in physical contact with another person after her resurrection, she doesn't feel the same as another human does. The closest I can think of is that she probably feels like she's filled with static electricity, that buzz and that tension there. For highly perceptive / psychic humans, they probably get a glimpse of her fullness when they have some physical contact with her, or if they have some low level psychic ability that they haven't explored yet, they just get a headache

3) Clara still visits the Paternoster Gang every now and then after her resurrection, knowing if anyone would understand and anyone would be able to give her some support that it would be other friends of the Doctor who she already knew. Their house in Victorian London was the first place she went to after she had some time to comprehend everything. She's stayed there for periods before leaving again, not wanting to cause too much trouble or time, but she has enjoyed spending time with them (especially Jenny, they vibe well together) and helping to solve some of their cases. Whenever they call, she answers, and whenever she needs them, they're there

Danny Pink was Clara's happy ending. Losing him was her doom.

I genuinely don't think that she ever got over him, and that his death changed her life and her perspective completely. While frequently nearly dying in her adventures with the Doctor thereafter didn't help, I do think she kind of loses herself. Danny after all was a beautiful grounding force that she needed, who came into her life at exactly the right time. She saw a future with him even though it scared her, even though she struggled to give up the adrenaline found in the stars in the Doctor.

She was prepared to sacrifice all of that to keep Danny in her life, and for it not only not to work but for him to be made a pawn in the Master's game, losing him three times in the process? That burns her and sets a ticking clock I don't think anyone could have stopped. She loses her grounding force and in turn gets lost in her life with the Doctor, so much so that it ends up costing her life.

After coming to terms with her resurrection, I think she almost felt a bit disappointed. As much as she was terrified of dying, I think a part of her was ready, hoping that she'd meet him again in the next life. She still feels a lot of responsibility to what happened to him, and thinks and dreams about him frequently.

She doesn't talk about him a lot, and it takes time for her to speak about him with new partners especially. She doesn't keep many photos lying around of him, but has a locket with his photo in it that she wears on a regular basis. And I think, if she were to be able to choose, she would have chosen that life with Danny over anything

Clara is the bisexual stereotype of never sits properly on a couch. There are plenty of times where she just sits upside down for a second, especially in her UNIT verse when she also has Rocket to play with. She gets a bit fidgety if she does sit in the same position for a while so often shifts around. While she has marked homework using her sofa and the coffee table (usually with something on the TV as well), she does prefer using her desk in her little home office

Clara loves fruit, specifically cherries, mango, pomegranate. blackcurrants and redcurrants. These tend to be her go to snack, especially for during the day. If she's busy with something like marking schoolwork she's usually got a bowl by the side that she can nibble on while she's working

She's also partial to chocolate (primarily dark and milk) and more citrusy sweets, as well as ladoo and barfi which she loves getting from different places and bringing over whenever she's invited somewhere. She technically knows how to make these but it always tends to go wrong

1. Paneer pasanda

Shallow fried stuffed paneer sandwiches in an onion-tomato based gravy. It’s a dish her gran would make only for special occasions, that Clara always looked forward to when she was younger. When she was old enough, she would often help her gran to make it for parties. She used to always try and go back to Blackpool for her birthday when she could so that her and her gran could make it together. She’ll still make it for herself on her birthday after her resurrection and makes it for those she loves on special occasions

2. Punjabi kadhi pakora

Fried onion pakoras in a creamy and sour yoghurt sauce. A dish that her parents would often make when Clara was growing up. It was one of the first recipes that Clara’s gran taught her and the first one that she tried to make for her and her dad

3. Fish and chips

She’s always loved fish and chips. If her parents were taking her for a treat or she could choose what to have for dinner, she would pick or ask to have fish and chips. She used to eat it quite often when she was at uni and got sick of it for a while, but now she occasionally still gets it. She tries to get it from a different shop each time

4. Machchli Amritsari

The mind splice that gave Clara better technological skills in Bells of St John was removed when she was resurrected, it having been a temporary thing from the Great Intelligence anyway. Much to especially Howie's chagrin, this means that she's pretty terrible with technology again now and is very happy with her old fashioned flip phone. He's actually hidden it and gotten her a smartphone before and she just broke it on purpose and got a new flip phone