Dathomir enthusiast

something important to consider about Anakin Skywalker is that he is the teen dad to another teenager who is like. four years younger than him. and also he is the son of another teen dad. this is of course not counting anakin’s other dad (the force) which may exist or maybe his mom was just making shit up to the guy who freed him from slavery, aka his teen dad’s dad. this is also not counting the other two kids anakin is a dad to, because to be fair he wasn’t a teen when they were born but it sure was close. and of course, there is also the palpatine to consider. in conclusion he really should have crashed out earlier.

“why did people characterize him like this when it doesn’t even make sense“ unfortunately the answer is usually racism

Making "oog. Waugh. 🥺" kinds of noises after being reminded of a very basic fact about blorbo I already knew

You'd think "don't use a fictional creature as an allegory for oppressed minorities and as a horde of vile automatons that it's always okay to kill in the same work at the same time" would be a no brainer, but roughly 70% of all works featuring goblins and/or robots demonstrate otherwise.

Star Wars using this exact formula with droids blows my mind to this day. Like, they really can’t decide whether they’re actually an oppressed group or genuinely mindless automatons whose inner lives we don’t need to worry about.

Given that Solo: A Star Wars Story features a droid liberation activist who's very obviously characterised as a mean-spirited parody of a women's rights activist and whose concerns are consistently treated as misguided and laughable (before they blow her up and use her brain to repair a spaceship), I'm not sure it's that the writers can't decide so much as it that they don't want to say what they really think out loud.

the sheer tragedy of obi wan telling luke he needs to either kill his father or let the galaxy be enslaved forever is something we need to deny or skirt around. we need obi wan not to believe that. we need him not to have said that. we need luke to have both not heard and not disobeyed that. we cant sit with a narrative of biblical forgiveness. everything the good guy says needs to be correct with cited wookiepedia sources and everything the bad guy says is irrelevant. we need to do this. because having even a slightly critical take on a fictional religion is of course, how we get genocide. we have to obey and defend the fictional religion forever. see how boring you all are? see why you’re not fun to talk to???

its actually so sickening the way luke was trained as an attack dog more than as a jedi. he has to seek out the gentler uses of the force on his own because obiwan and yoda wanted him ready to kill vader and werent really thinking too far past that part. its so fucked up cuz like . did they even expect him to live himself? or was killing vader the more important part. when did he learn about force healing? and how many lives were lost because he didnt know it sooner. crusty old men. fr.

the climax of his character arc being him tossing his lightsaber aside still makes me go crazy. he looks at vader’s wiry stump. he looks at his own prosthetic hand. he realizes he’s become part of an ancient cycle of violence. and then he ends it! insane.

We should popularize more hispanized phonetic spellings of classic character names like we did with esnupi

well-written women who narratively suck are like crack cocaine to me. hello shitty little woman do you need some crumbs of love that you've clearly never been given? lol

anakin gets criticized for being too greedy but honestly the things anakin wants are often like. "for my loved ones to be safe" "to be around people that like me and are nice to me" "to be respected as a person"… he’s not really asking for much

as someone who got 2 concussions this year and inhaled toxic substances at the workplace i can confidently inform you all that all characters in the star wars prequels are absolved of stupidity. they're all dumb as a box of rocks but its not their fault that no one made them wear helmets in wartime. the introduction of SPOSHA (space OSHA) would reduce incidences of darth vader creation by at least one i just know it

"anakin shouldn't have done that" he was huffing space gasoline at age 7 literally what did you expect. "obi-wan shouldn't have done that" he literally goes through a window face first in episode 2. "padme shouldn't have done that" she's had a career since she was 10

i've crunched the numbers and analyzed the situations man and i tell you i ran this in the most favorable of conditions. assuming this boy turned 19 literally 5 minutes before AOTC picks up and Space Years can be substituted by our years, and by '20+' we mean 21, this dude gets electrocuted every 7.4 weeks. dude...... like bro. like man.

HEY SO IT WASN'T FAVORABLE CONDITIONS APPARENTLY IT WAS FUCKING 30 TIMES FOR A RATE OF 1 ELECTROCUTION EVERY 5 WEEKS HAHAHAHAHAHA

star wars gotta get crazier with its cameos. maul nips into the gay bar and ventress is there drinking hard liquor and nobody addresses it at all. ahsoka turns on the tv lo and behold it's number 1 glup shitto mother talzin selling the nightsister equivalent of snake oil. somewhere in the background of an important mon mothma briefing we can see han solo snorting a line off chewie's ass. its not important to the narrative in the slightest. if we're gonna be doing fan service lets do it right

I'm obsessed with Maul having sharp fangs because Zabraks are carnivorous and no jokes I think he would bite into someone's throat if the fight got far enough, I even believe he would straight up eat some mouthful of an especially hated enemy in an act of triumph and insult towards them. I absolutely can see him feasting on Sidius' heart, the guy deserves it.

Yoda was banned and no one will talk about why

People have been trying to bribe the story of Yoda’s ban from Masters Yaddle and T'ra Saa for literal centuries. They’ve profited so much from this disaster. They fucking love it. Every century or so they let slip some new made-up detail to stoke the fire.