God Of Shitposts @venomaximus - Tumblr Blog

What if dream sans went back in time to the day pre-apple nightmare and snatched the apple from his hand before he bit it and ate it instead

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The opposite of hyperventilation is Hypofuggy/Hypostuffy

*gives snom a tank*

Hey snom

HAVE FUUUUN!!!!

#blast those bad vibes to hell!!

Threw a bird so hard at a wall it fucking liquified on impact

#TAKE THAT CROW #screaming all fucking day

Sometimes I like to think the real reason why satan created the 9 Layers of hell is because of overpopulation

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venomaximus

Hey p.m sometimes i think some aithest have trypophobia because curches are hole-y places

#you get it #right?#god please kill me

If you guys want horror take dial-up sound and slow it down by 700% and done!

Here try it: https://youtu.be/IF2v32xCD0Y

#Youtube

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

…THEY’RE CALLED T-SHIRTS BECAUSE THEY RESEMBLE THE LETTER T

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

also they were originally a form of underwear and I think that’s nifty!

shroompuff1

GAUD THIS HAS LONG BEEN COMMON KNOLEDGE

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

I don’t know what the fuck counts as common knowledge!!! for years I thought everyone knew that lobsters have teeth in their stomachs & blood can be used as an egg substitute. my perspective is slightly skewy!

perniciousprophet

How much blood contitutes one egg?

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

¼ cup of blood can be substituted for one medium sized egg

venomaximus

There are 37.2 trillion cells in the human body and this post put all of my cells in attack mode

Did you know that the british call whiped cream squirty cream?

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Her gaud Did you know that the british call whiped cream squirty cream?

#SQUIRTY CREAM #GOD PLEASE KILL ME

Non-euclidean slip and slide

AAAAAAAAAA SNOM HELP IM FALLING AAAAAAAAAA

#please send help #also ignore the last one i sent you

You know i tried watermelon on pizza and it slaps!

Even with pear or chocolate on pizza and its the best!

Hey gaud what do you think about this?

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Ok gaud...bad news... So...theres a jojo refrence in the scp foundation...ok ima head out

*mutates into a 50ft tall wendigo like cryptid and falls backwards into an interdimentinal portal and vanishes from exsistence*

#suffering

I will align your bones in a perfect straight line and use it to make a sword to smite your enemies with the power of god and leave you in my attic leaving you to accumulate dust until the end of time

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