Snap. Crackle. Pop.

I began working on DataCamp after a long hiatus. I didn’t stop working on modules because I didn’t like them or wasn’t learning rather life happened. This is normal and it happens to everyone. How do I bounce back after such a long break?

Acknowledge and forgive yourself for straying  

There can be a million and one reason(s) why you stopped but once you’ve decided you’d like to start again understand you may not remember everything – which is completely normal. Practice self compassion and don’t beat yourself up!

Review completed modules and rework if necessary

Review previously completed modules for a refresher. Don’t be afraid to reset and rework modules if you feel that’ll help jog your memory better. DataCamp will show code you submitted which is helpful. Additionally, documentation can be helpful if you don’t recall what a library or function does. This, as a silver lining, is a very good skill to build!

Continue as though nothing happened

Once I start working on something I stopped working on, my focus shifts to what I’m learning and what I will learn in the future. Mind frame is key; otherwise I’d revert to beating myself up.

I always found databases enchanting. The course I took as an undergrad spent significant time on database design and perhaps a class or two on queries. Our DB2 databases at work hold information essential for us to offer benefits to our clients’ participants. Though I spend a good portion of my work day wandering through and gathering data for various teams or testing, a 2018 personal goal was to write advanced queries.

I’ve been working through DataCamp’s R courses but shelved those as soon as I saw a SQL course. I was able to complete the course with ease, learning about and applying keywords: SELECT, FROM, AND, OR, HAVING, GROUP BY and ORDER BY. The course contained a section about aggregate functions and the use of aliases.  After I finished that section, I went over to W3schools and ran through their function examples. I work with mainframe daily (hourly sometimes) ensuring jobs complete as expected. I’m cautious when incorporating functions into queries as queues can double during peak times without added computation.

After taking a hiatus from programming, I realized how much I not only enjoyed it but how much I missed it. Once I graduated and leaped into the healthcare industry, programming was replaced with query writing, test planning and defect resolution. Though I enjoy spending time surrounded by Plan Options, Coverage Categories and Health Savings Accounts I began to wonder; as healthcare costs increased, companies lowered their contribution in exchange for credit matching their participants and annual deductibles soared what happens when someone chooses the wrong plan? Specifically, what is the cost difference between someone selecting the best plan for them rather than selecting a plan that is considered ‘good enough’?  

I educated friends’ fresh off their parent’s coverage about premiums, deductibles, coinsurance and the value of choosing the best health plan option for them. The disparity between those who knew key concepts to select the best coverage versus those who in cases, flipped a coin or chose the cheapest convinced me to look into this further. Knowing my learning style is not only visual but a good blend of social and physical I set out to learn skills I need to answer my question.

Though I programmed extensively in 2.X, my graduate program focused on 3.X so to the Python Documentation I went. While an undergrad, I didn’t think too much about documentation because questions I had aligned with the chapters so as long as I read that- I was fine. My summers spent researching along with various internships taught me the importance of reading through documentation as questions arose. Python’s documentation is not only easy to navigate; it has several examples that help reinforce concepts.  

As iterations are published, a page is created informing users about differences against previous iterations. Since we are working with 3.X I found What’s New in Python 3.0. Print is a function now…what? I thought as I scrolled through and read about updates. I fired up Jupyter and tried it out. In awe, I worked out several examples in the documentation before realizing how much I had forgotten. I was taught programming is a skill and the more you write, the more you’ll learn conversely the less you write the higher possibility you’ll have of forgetting what you know. In an effort to relearn basic concepts ahead of my first graduate course I set out to find tutorials. Though I found Codecademy’s Python course informative, while working through it, I realized I also wanted to relearn about libraries I had used in the past: Numpy, Pandas and SciPy. Inside the Beginner’s Guide to Python, Datacamp was listed for learning Python for Data Science.

Luckily, Intro to Python for Data Science was a free course so I jumped on board. The IPython shell allowed me to write practice code to solve the exercises which was helpful because it caught syntax errors before I put them in my script. There is also a tab for Slides if I needed a reminder of what Fillip, our course instructor, said. I found this feature useful since my short term memory can be a tad iffy. The best part about the Intro to Python for Data Science course was the section about Numpy. I was able to relearn about arrays, and subset arrays utilizing the Numpy library.

I’ve been curious when it comes to podcasts so I was stoked when one of my homework assignments was to listen to a few. Being Boss is a podcast Brianne introduced me to that is for creative entrepreneurs. It’s hosted with Emily Thompson and Kathleen Shannon.

My first Podcast was Episode #132 with Maker Boss Nicole Bisby. She spoke about how she got started with her candle company. Some things that really struck me was she essentially got started spending no money, started small and stayed out of debt. She shed light on failures and how she continues to educate herself. Nicole also spoke about the importance of persistence. Persistence, she noted, is a finicky thing. There’s definitely a time and place to be persistent.

I didn’t know ‘reset time’ had a name. It’s called white space. I listened to the Scheduling White Space minisode. I agreed when the hosts spoke about working too much. I spend 90% of the time working from home and can attest that I work a lot. I probably work longer hours than I did when I went into the office. I’m sure we can all agree that we need time to reset. That time will help us not only be more relaxed but be more productive and creative during work time. Sure we could all squeeze out some time but how do we practice it? I immediately thought of unplugging and turning on the raining playlist with fresh cucumbers on my eyes.

Booze talk? Count me in! In the Happy Hour like a Boss episode, I learned how to make simple syrup and the importance of knowing how to make basic cocktails. It made sense when the hosts spoke about fresh fruits and veggies. They also spoke to Katlyn who makes beer with her husband out of Portland. She brewed a mushroom beer for crying out loud. How great is that? Most of the talk steered towards trying something new so you can expand your palate, grow your knowledge of things. I couldn’t agree more but as I get older, I can’t hang like I used to. If I plan to get lit, haha, it has to happen on a Friday because I can’t bounce back like I used to. Cheers to the next one!

Is there a word for seasonal yogis? If so, I’m that person. Today’s episode spotlights Meredith Vansant, a corporate consultant turned full time yoga studio owner. Meredith spoke about being isolated from her community since she moved to D.C. from Oklahoma. She left a high paying job as a government consultant because it didn’t feel authentic to her. So she set out to build a community of body conscious people. She stressed “staying on your own mat” when asked about how she grew such a large following. It’s important, she noted, to shop your competitors and keep an eye out but more importantly, listen to your own community. Nothing will ever be perfect and check your unattainable goals at the door, she noted. She expressed enthusiasm for pushing boundaries, embrace being different and staying on brand. One thing Meredith mentioned that really struck me is that drive and work ethic is what will separate you from your competitors which is advice that is transferable to any industry.

I like all types of makeup but I always find myself hanging out in the lip section. Lip liner, lipsticks, glosses and that one tube of chapstick I can never seem to finish overflow my acrylic containers. It didn’t occur to me that I may have too many until I inadvertently purchased duplicates. (I should note I tend to veer towards the nudes and berries.) While I have no qualms having backups of some of my favorite shades, lipsticks have a two year shelf life and I’m not the gal that enjoys wasting money.

I figured I should keep track of the lip products in my collection since I apt to purchase lip products often. I thought I’d throw them on a spreadsheet but you I’m a database kid so I figured I’d build one.

I spent a significant amount of time thinking about my database schema. I scribbled down table names, fields, and relationships. I realized quickly, I needed a bit of help so I went to the only place filled with those more experienced with makeup than I - /r/makeupaddiction. I’ve been a subscriber since I’ve had a reddit account and that sub reddit changed my makeup game. Granted, it’s still totally possible for me to walk out the door with uneven eyeliner or looking like a panda but hey-progress right? With a quick search, I fell onto a plethora of spreadsheets that had fields I hadn’t even thought of. I made notes and pulled out the white board.

After multiple versions, I decided to just build it. I fired up pythonanywhere, launched a new MySQL console, named it beauty and got to work. I chose pythonanywhere because it’s free to host and it’s in the cloud so accessible the next time I find myself pacing the aisle of a drugstore debating whether I have the shade. I settled on Lips as a table name because I’m so creative, ha. BrandName, Product, Shade, Price, Color and Finish were my attributes. I began filling in my table and realized how many lipsticks I have. With that, I realized I probably didn’t need the price attribute. Who wants to be reminded they spent $24 on a few ounces of product anyways?

Twenty seven lipsticks later, I decided to tear it all down and rebuild. In software nothing is ever perfect and versions are a thing. I’m hoping to add tables in the coming weeks that contain my face primers, foundations, blushes, bronzers, eyeshadow palettes and mascara. I definitely have a collection of things I use to look like I got eight plus hours of sleep.

Today is October 13th aka Treat yourself day and because Grace Hopper Celebration is next week, I thought it’d be fitting to go shopping! 

I get asked often what others wear to the conference so I figured we’d chat about my favorite places to shop. One thing to note is above all, dress comfortably. There were plenty of people in jeans, some sort of tech T and a pair of chucks. This will probably be my outfit for Friday. I intend to be ready to PAR-TY! In past years there were others who were dressed in business casual. Some of the stores I’m looking forward to shopping at later include: Ann Taylor Loft, Zara, Gap and H&M. Their clothing fits well, are perfect for my age group and there’s always a coupon floating around. Who doesn’t love a good sale? Ooh and heyyy did I mention ABI.Houston is hosting a wellness event on Thursday morning? Come do yoga with us on the lawn and get centered before you start your day.

I checked the weather and it looks like rain is in the forecast! I was saddened to hear but that means an umbrella is necessary! So don’t forget to pack that. This is my 6th conference and I’ve done everything from interview in jeans and a t to this cute 3 piece suit (<- it was my first conference I had no idea what I was doing-don’t judge me) and no one batted an eye. Dress comfortably and let your confidence show!

With the Call for Participation deadline quickly approaching, I thought it’d be neat to share some additional resources to help you wrap that up and get submitted! These resources are geared at providing additional support to those who’ve never been to the conference, are having a difficult time finding inspiration, or those who simply need help connecting with others.

Inspiration Board (link)

-What it is: A spreadsheet that has actual sessions from GHC15, links to the schedule from last year, links to notes/blogs created by various volunteers (like me!)

-Why it was created: I created this as an additional resource for those of whom haven’t gotten an opportunity to attend GHC and are at a loss for the type of content that is showcased through various sessions. It’s also helpful to spur great ideas based on sessions from last year.

-Why it’s helpful: It contains links to abstracts, offers additional examples for various types of submissions and could help those distinguish if their submissions should fall into one track or if it’d be better suited for another.

BONUS: If you are planning on attending #GHC16 and interested in giving back during the conference, you can see what past volunteers have written. There will be opportunities to blog or take notes during sessions.

Connections Board (link)

-What it is: A board created to help women find others who are interested in collaborating for a submission

- Why it was created: The board was created to help women find others who share similar interests + who’d be interested in working on a submission together.

BONUS: You can see some of the ideas others have and their ideas could spark a great idea for you!

Tips from the Pros (link)

- What it is: An article written by Karen Catlin (@kecatlin) offering additional advice on making your CFP submission shine

- Why it’s important: Karen has spoken at GHC multiple times and has had both successful and unsuccessful submissions. She offers great advice and provides personal examples on what she did and why it did or did not work.

-Why I included it: I included this article because it’s one of the best advice article written this year. Karen has also spoken at GHC multiple times and has co-written a great book on speaking at technical events.

I’ve been asked before what’s the best way to give back to the Grace Hopper Conference. Volunteer! If 2016 will be your second conference or your sixth (like me!), there is always an opportunity to give back to the community.  Recently, the Committee Volunteer Opportunities have been released and there are a number of opportunities to choose from.

Track Committee Volunteer

The conference organizers are expecting 15,000 attendees to come to Houston for the conference! Being a part of the track committee allows you to review the Call for Participation submissions. You’ll have a part in rating each submission based on criteria provided to you. Since the conference will draw a large crowd, the sessions will be structured around Clusters. Clusters are grouped tracks that cover similar topics. If you’re interested in being a part of the track committee, be sure to check out the tracks available and sign up for one that fits your expertise.  Clusters include: Technology, Products A to Z, Emerging Technology, Open Source, Career, Organizational Transformation and Posters. You can find the full list here.

Scholarship Review Committee Volunteer

The Grace Hopper Conference has a huge impact on attendees.  92% of student respondents felt committed to their chosen field  and 95% felt inspired about the career opportunities ahead of them in post GHC surveys .  In 2015, 499 students attended the Grace Hopper Conference thanks to a GHC Scholarship (source). Each year, scholarships are awarded to faculty and students to be able to attend the conference. Being a part of this committee means you’ll play a role in reviewing and helping award students and faculty alike an opportunity to experience the conference. It’s important to note, you must be able to commit to 5 non-consecutive hours during April 6th and April 20th.

Student Opportunity Lab Volunteer (SOL)

The SOL is an interactive session where attendees can have more of a personalized approach to the advice they receive on various topics. While all applications to volunteer are welcomed, priority is given to former SOL speakers.  

Someone asked me to describe what it was like to be an attendee at the Grace Hopper Conference in one word. I said magical.

It is difficult to describe what it’s like to be surrounded by thousands of other women who work in the same field. Especially when tech giants like Facebook, Microsoft, Google or Amazon don’t call your city home. To have three days to learn from, connect with and celebrate other women in computing is just the greatest experience. I’ve mentioned in welcome videos before how genuinely excited I get a month or so leading up to the conference. Once the app launches, it lights up with others expressing their excitement and sharing their tips from what to pack to what sessions not to miss. Motivational quotes, photos from prior years and introductions begin to fill the news feed with endless amounts of likes.

There’s a community of volunteers that stretches out their arms to welcome and to help first time attendees navigate through throughout the conference, others who choose to take notes or live blog their feelings during sessions so that others who are unable to join can experience some of the sessions from afar. There are also remote volunteers who help promote the conference on all social media outlets. Imagine- there are people who care so deeply about a conference, they spend their free time on Twitter, Linkedin, Facebook and Instagram promoting the conference and contributing from afar.

Once at the conference, striking  up conversations about different types of infrastructure technologies, discussions on best practices, how to become better leaders, how to ask for more, how to lean in, mentoring, or discussing what sorts of good eats surround the conference center are all possible. You meet women who genuinely have your back and who are glad to connect you with others.

All that in 3 days.

I am always a bit saddened at the Friday night celebrations. It was always bittersweet for me. Yes I was first to form the congo line but acknowledging yet another GHC was ending always saddened me a bit. The friends I’ve made, the connections I’ve established and more importantly the reaffirmation that I belonged in an industry where I’m a minority are all reasons why I returned. It was as though on Friday, the celebration ended. It doesn’t have to anymore.

This year the Anita Borg Institute announced ABI.Local. A global initiative not only aimed at extending the reach of their programming after annual events like GHC but to create communities of women in technology. Currently in cities like: New York City, Washington DC., Silicon Valley, Chicago, Houston, London, Delhi-NCR, Los Angeles, Boston and Austin and coming to cities like Seattle, Portland, Atlanta, Tokyo and Toronto ABI.Local has positioned itself to be one global community.

This week marks week two post GHC! I hope at this point, you’ve made contact with others you happened to meet at the conference and have established a connection. This week, we will focus on post GHC interviews.

At this point, companies should begin contacting (if they haven’t already done so), applicants with whom they’d like to move forward with the interview process.(1)  If you are one of the lucky applicants, congratulations! Keep doing what you are doing! For all those who might not fare as well, this one is for you!

I’ve had my fair share of interviews (for both internships as well as full-time positions) throughout the years of attending GHC and have gotten the “Next Steps” email as well as the “Thanks for interviewing with us” email. One of the best things that struck out to me my first year attending GHC was the career fair. I recognized early on, it was probably my only chance of getting some face to face time in front of some of the best companies in tech. These tech companies simply didn’t recruit at my school and a lot of times, I was certain if I had applied online, my resume probably never got seen in a flurry of thousands of applicants competing for the same job.  The upside to that though is at GHC not only do you have the potential to get one interview- you can get many.

The downside however is the potential to get several thanks but no thanks emails. Interviewing is tough and it takes a lot out you. Here are some things I did throughout my job hustling years to get past those ‘you just weren’t the perfect fit’ type emails.

It is totes okay to binge eat any or all of the following post email: junk food, the whole bag of skinny pop, chicken wings or anything your normal diet simply doesn’t allow.

It is okay to not know every single answer.

One time I got asked about sets in python. Problem was, I forgot sets don’t allow duplicates then and there so that question was bust. I don’t recall a lot from that interview-just that I didn’t know the correct answer. What did I do? I went and looked in Python docs until I found my answer. You bet your butter I never forgot that sets don’t allow duplicates in python.  

Comparison will lead to self-terror and should be avoided at all costs.

In school, we’d always talk about how the internship/research hunt was going and there’d always be one or two people who’d boast about having 3-4 offers. Stay away from those people. I’m not saying don’t talk to them but don’t compare yourself to them. There will always be someone who can code better than you, faster than you or bust out more robust code than yours. Celebrate their successes but recognize how awesome you are.

You might need to alter your mindset…just a tad.

It ties in with the comparison bit. It is easy to beat yourself up when you go through periods of nos. I actually had a running list of things written down of things I was good at. The list had comp sci related things as well as other things like: yo-yos, dodge-ball,eating. I would add 3 things to the list every time I got a rejection email and would reread my list. It helped me from getting too down on myself.

You can learn from every interview in some way.

As I mentioned before, only you and your interviewer know how the interview went.

Skills missteps

I’d like to say that my python blurp was one of the worse things that ever happened to me during a technical interview. Nope. You know what I did do? Get help on those things post interview. My late advisor sat down with me and gave me 3 problems to work on and report back with my answers. Every week.

Program program and program. You’ll never get better if you don’t practice. Practice doesn’t make perfect, but it will build confidence.  

Behavioral missteps  

Sometimes, it’s difficult to ask for assistance during programming interviews. I tried to focus on solving the problem-quietly. Problem was, I figured out being quiet doesn’t help you during an interview. It actually hurts you. Engineers probably don’t want to hear silence…especially when it’s apparent you are struggling. It’s an interview-not an awkward first date. Be vocal about your thoughts or the route you are taking and talk through it. Sometimes, you’ll figure out your error by vocalizing it or your interviewer may step in and guide you in the right direction.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and try again.

We don’t win them all but remember you are smart, talented and driven. Could’ve should’ve would’ve doesn’t help you. At this point, focus on what went wrong, write down a plan to fix it, execute and keep on interviewing.

Rejection is tough. You have to move forward though. Remember to stay healthy, exercise and unwind once in a while. You’ll find a great place to work or conduct research.

Like a Boss. 

I hope you enjoyed your time in Houston. I also hoped you met, networked with and connected with a lot of female technologists! This week is follow up week AKA the most important week of the year.

Don’t let all of that networking go to waste.

First thing is first- let’s find those business cards you stashed away. Hopefully, you have them together if not, time to fish them out of every notepad, card holder and bag you had around you.

Secondly-the sorting begins! Go on and dig out that sorting hat. I found it helpful to have a few piles. The connectors,the influencers, the potential mentors and the networkers.

The networkers- those who I’d love to have in my network. The people who make this list are generally people who are in different fields or have various levels of experience.

The influencers- the influencers typically were the speakers or those whom I aspired to be. Some of my influencers include people like Megan Smith, Jo Miller, Nora Denzel and of course Sheryl Sandberg.

The potential mentors- those who I look up to and feel I could learn from.

The connectors- the connectors tend to be social butterflies. They know the inner workings of Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn and they know everyone.

(Note: Sometimes people can fit into one or more pile and that’s cool too)

All of these people will play a key role in your network and it is important to recognize which pile they belong to so you can approach them correctly. Every person is different and each email should bridge both what they are good at and what kind of relationship you are looking to establish.

Third- Establish the connection. A lot of times, their business cards will have their preferred contact. This can be anything from Twitter handles to personal emails. Armed with that info., it’s time to make contact!

3 (and a halfsies)

Probably the most difficult yet most important part of this entire thing.

Emails or LinkedIn are actually one of the easiest ways of getting in contact with someone. Things to include are:

A reintroduction of yourself

A quick note as to where you met/what you were doing when you exchanged information at #GHC15 (I say this because it is conference season so sometimes- people will leave one conference and jet off to the next)

What you are looking to gain from your new found connection

Thank them for their time and finally

Wish them well.

So they love to tweet

You have a 140 characters to make an impression so go for it! I dig deep and get creative. Emojis are your friend, insert tiny snippets of your conversation or if you really just can’t; DM is the way to go.

Fourth Keep the spirit going. You've made the initial contact-great! Don’t let them forget you! No this doesn’t mean you have to have weekly emails but drop them a line (or tweet) once in a while to check in. Maintaining a relationship with your new connection isn’t hard but it is pivotal in networking.

So you are staying for the weekend after an amazing 3 days surrounded by 12k women (and men) in tech?  Time to explore Houston! Take in the sights and have a ball! 

Ongoing 

Texas Renfest

Peter Pan 

Red Bull Flying Bach

Saturday 10/17

Rockets v Miami-Toyota Center 

ZiegenBock Festival at Sam Houston Racepark 

Korean Festival- Discovery Green 

Wings over Houston-Ellington Field

East End Street Fest 

Rob Schneider- Improv Houston

Day of the Dead Rock Stars: Dead Souls Rock Exhibit 

Spendid China X- Miller Outdoor Theatre 

The Beans at Karbach’s Octoberfest Finale 

A night at Market Square 

Sunday 10/18 

Houston Dynamo v. Seattle Sounders  

Lone Star Symphonic Band: All aboard/all about Katy 

Wekfest Texas 

Wings over Houston-Ellington Field 

Want to look for other events/ideas? 

Houston on the Cheap

I blogged Jo Miller’s talk last year and was elated when the schedule came out and she was on it. Jo gives amazing career advice and now that I’m living my first year in corporate life, it’s only fitting that I continue to learn from the absolute best.

I actually made sure I got my golden ticket early yesterday after picking up my badge. Jo packed the house last year and I was more than sure she’d do it all over again.

So we all know and can relate to the emerging leader’s quandary -> You can’t get a higher-level job without leadership experience…..

but you can’t get leadership experience without the job.

We all want to be great. At the same time we can’t afford to wait. We shouldn’t be the best kept secret at our company/organization. What can we do? Be famous for something! Know what your claim to fame is. hmm. I’ll admit I was intrigued but I wanted to learn more since I had been walking around for years trying to convince people I was Batman in my best Michael Keaton voice.

Jo mentioned we’d be learning how in the workshop our ideal career niche, out leadership brand and how to make this value visible.

First up, leadership brand. The 3 essential elements needed for a great leadership brand included being able to answer: What are you passionate about?, What are your skills and talents? and finally What does your company/industry need to value? Jo reiterated we needed to have all 3 and noted those of us who work in fast paced industries like tech should reevaluate the last question every 6 months to a year. She also mentioned to be authentic about our own leadership style. To own it, communicate it and put a value on it; essentially put a brand on it.

Jo asked us to think about where we want to be in 2 years. In 5 years. I’ve always had an idea of where I’d like to end up but with an ever-changing lifestyle, I worried I wouldn’t have some concrete answer. I thought of my father’s generation of workers. Those who’d started and ended their career at the same company. I felt almost like if I followed that career stance, I’d have an immediate answer. This definitely wasn’t the case. Jo also asked us to chew on what brand do I need to become known as now in order to get there? She discussed how our brands must evolve throughout our careers. I agreed as after almost a year into my career, I’m ready to tackle more complex projects and or work with even larger multi-service clients. I’m sure most would agree a way we grow is to be challenged.

Next to making our value visible. When we were in college, the recipe for success was this:

results = reward + recognition. As we progress in our careers however, that simply isn’t the case. Jo shared the 4 steps for making our brands visible.

To work less.

Jo Miller gets me! I perked up and thought..YES! SHE GETS ME.

Communicate your brand to others.

Jo had us create a 30 second commercial.

Work hard on the right projects.

I took this idea to heart. I’ve been given lots of opportunities to work on various projects as a new comer to my team. At this level, I need to continue to work hard but I need to begin to target those projects that can push my brand to the next level.

Promote your accomplishments

“It’s not what you know and it’s not who you know. It’s who knows what you know.” (-Nora Denzel)

Jo gave us ideas on how we could promote our accomplishments. They included ideas such as presenting in meetings and inviting leaders. Writing a blog or paper for publication or asking a colleague to “toot your horn”, and reciprocate.

Everyone wants to be recognized for the hard work and dedication they have to their jobs. We put in 40+ hours each week and bring our best selves. It’s only natural we’d want to receive recognition unfortunately the older we get, the less that happens. It’s our job to step up and really begin to communicate our brand to others.

Couldn’t join us at Grace Hopper this year? Read the slide deck here. 

Male allies are having a moment. I missed the session last year but heard all about it through word of mouth and Twitter. Hearing stories of women being mistreated socially and professionally is difficult but necessary for us to move forward.

I’m here 15 minutes early and the place is already at capacity. I’m reminded of my late advisor-Dr. O.-one of the greatest male allies around. I grew excited as I looked around and saw all the men in the room. It was as though every man at the conference was in this room.

Speakers Ray and Rayona took the stage and gave some fun facts about themselves. I sparkly duo-they mentioned that last year the male ally panel listened to stories and this year we would hear from others (aka them).

They jumped right in and spoke about the bobble head ally. Those men who would shake their head up and down with the yeah I get it over and over again. Sadly, I myself have encountered this version of a male ally.  “Good intentions aren’t good enough..” Ray mentioned “we [males] have been the mass majority of the problem….it’s all justified and I get it and I’m sorry” Ray continued. I didn't really know what to think but I felt as though this was deja vu and I had heard it all before.

Why men should care:

a better quality of life

no more isolation

restore our dignity

our family members

it makes for better business

Ray and Rayona went over each one and almost seemed to emphasize the last- it makes for better business. The whole business notion bothers me. Why now? Did we as a society miss the memo that stated there were X number of women in the United States? So is it about making the world a better place or is it about dollars and cents. I charged on.

“Women have a lot of work to do for  each other.” “If you think it’s challenging for white women, think of our sisters of color who have a much taller hill to climb”- Rayona. I took a deep breath and began to shift in my seat.

3 powerful leverage points Ray and Rayona discussed were

empowering and supporting women leaders

engaging men as allies

identifying and transforming institutional spots and systematic barriers.

Finally I thought. Some solutions. The duo mentioned the biggest obstacle we face is unconscious bias. They spoke of how it can be defeated by awareness. “we live inside of language…those conclusions are the source of our reactions”…Rayona.

Key insights to know about men:

shaming and blaming doesn't ‘work

moral case

business case

personal case

mistakes will happen

We cannot evolve as a species without forgiveness. If you are looking for mistakes you’ll find them. If you are looking for progress you’ll find that too. I thought about progress and how we can get there. Ray and Rayona spoke about accountability. For organizations-> metrics, a call on women, for organizations to insist recruiters bring in qualified minorities. An example was used for an C-suite position that remained vacant until a qualified person filled it. Finally, sponsorship; two women: 1 white, 1 woman of color. The duo spoke about how we should push, promote and protect. I rather enjoyed the accountability bit. Companies however, will hire the best of the best. I waited for the pipeline word to drop. It didn’t and I didn’t miss it.

The duo reminded us if you take the case you can’t make a difference you won’t and that practice makes permanent not perfect.

Presented by: Christina Tan

When I normally think of presenting myself with credibility, I think of how others think of me. I’m in the first year of my life in “the real world” and have been thrown into situations with clients that would make others quiver at the thought. Even with all of my experiences, I worry that being a junior member of the team works against me when presenting my thoughts and ideas.

I approached this session with hopes that Christina Tan would make suggestions on how I can be more impactful when explaining my thoughts and ideas to clients, my colleagues and others.

Christina began by sharing a story about a woman who was introduced to give a speech and how she felt as though she was unworthy of the introduction that was given for her.

I wondered how much of the 350 (full house) audience felt that way. Surely, there would be a few of us who have done this and even more of us who had felt the same way. Christina mentioned that the lady went on to give a speech that right off the bat was less credible because she (the lady) had already expressed her unworthiness.

We started off the session by writing down 3-5 sentences on what is one thing in your community that needs to change. We then found a partner and read our sentence aloud. We then found a different partner who recorded us giving our same speech. Christina read an example aloud to us. The same example-3 different times. Once as a struggling speaker, the next as a rushed speaker, finally as a poised, credible speaker. After each speech Christina showed us annotations of each speaker and we discussed what was wrong with the speakers style of delivery and how that impacted their credibility.

I never thought to incorporate where to slow down when presenting ideas. Normally my ideas are expressed as they come to me; on the fly. I realized when I’ve written my thoughts down I become unsure of them. I use qualifiers. Qualifiers like I think, I feel alongside others.

Christina noted we’d be focusing on three things: voice, body language and body techniques. She reiterated things like projecting your voice and maintaining a consistent volume throughout the speech. Christina mentioned how body techniques such as maintaining a relaxed stance throughout your speech can aide in adding credibility to one as they present their ideas.

We also had a table exercise in which we were given different roles as we discussed a topic. I grabbed the piece of paper that served as the topic advisor. Luckily, our table was lively. The only downfall we had is the use of quantifiers. Why do we do this to ourselves I wondered. Why would I say something like I think or I feel when I say the things I thought or felt anyways.

Christina is a naturally talented speaker who conveyed thoughts and ideas well. When we are consciously aware to avoid the use of quantifiers in our speaking skills, maintain eye contact, be aware of our voice speed and maintain a relaxed body posture we are in a better position to have and be credible speakers.