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I’m loving this color

“I love it. I wish I were brave enough to go blue.”

“No, no – It’s too late now.” She shrugged. “I wanted to make you a cake but you’re here.” She said. “So you gonna help me make it now.”

“Am I right to assume this cake will be chocolate?” She had lit up like their Christmas tree, smile just as bright. “I’d love to help.”

“You were supposed to come later.” She frowned her eyebrows.

“I could leave and come back?” she offered, a subtle smile gracing her features.

Elijah nodded when she asked if he could trust himself, “I trust myself,” he said quietly, giving her a small smile. “But perhaps we can go somewhere public rather than my own home,” he looked at her, leading her toward one of the bars. “If we’ve been seen by someone else i would rather them not see us head toward my house…the rumors would be worse. Public is better.”

He was quicker on the draw than she was. It only had just dawned on her where they were. Out in the open, for anyone to catch sight of their less than proud behavior. "Yes, of course,” she replied in a soft voice as she followed him -- holding her head a little lower than before. 

Elijah shook his head, not sure what to say. It was a question he asked himself every morning. One he never had a good answer for and now with this added on. If or when Hayley returned he knew this would make matters worse. He gave Tatia another sad smile, “I don’t think I will be okay for a very long time,” he gave her a truthful answer. He let quiet hang between them before he pulled in a breath and looked up at the sky and then back at Tatia. “I’d still like to go have that drink…if you still trust me.”

Her hand took his, keeping the distance between them but not wanting Elijah to think she wasn’t still there him. Perhaps she should have retreated further -- taken the kiss as a sign that they were only making things harder on one another, but that wasn’t how she felt. His desperation only served to draw her in. “If you would have me,” she spoke softly, an attempt at a smile falling rather flat. “I trust you... Do you trust yourself?”

Elijah swallowed thickly, his tongue running over his lips, savoring the familiar comfort that was her before he stood up straight and gave her a sad half smile. “No I do…I have to apologize….I..” he trailed off. “That was inappropriate..” he whispered. He wasn’t sorry for the kiss so much as what it would do to them when their significant others found out. “But thank you…” he leaned forward and kissed her forehead, lingering before he put a little bit of space between them.

Taking a moment to collect herself as well, she tried to steady her quickened breath as she allowed him to purge. She did not disagree with his words, but there was a softness to her gaze. “I forgive you,” she said after a slow inhale. “And you are welcome.” Strange phrases to have back to back, but as he made his retreat she couldn’t help the concern from wrinkling her brow. “Elijah... Are you going to be okay?” This wasn’t going to be a secret; it wasn’t the way they handled things, or at least, the way they liked to. But it wasn’t the betrayal she feared on Henrik’s face, but the way this might affect the man before her. What it all meant.

Elijah groaned quietly as his lips parted when her tongue moved across his lip, giving her access. He sighed against her again, fingers gripping her back. He growled as he nipped, pulling back slowly. The Original leaned in for just a moment, placing the softest kiss against her bottom lip. His breathing was quick panted breaths, forehead resting against hers. He cleared his throat, eyebrows lifting a little as he stood up straight. “Tatia…” he trailed off, unsure what he should do.

It had to come to a stop, for as she felt herself getting too caught up in the moment, he had done much the same. If it had come to it, she would have been the one to pull back -- her hesitation a mixture of not wanting to deny him whatever he sought by kissing her, and her own selfishness. And then just like that, it was over; a soft sigh on her lips. “You don’t have to say anything,” she reassured him with a gentle brush of her hand against his.

Elijah pulled in a breath and wrapped his arm around her waist, his hand pressing against her cheek, fingers curled around the back of her neck in her hair as he tilted her head to the side. He deepened it back, gently pulling at her lower lip with his teeth before he followed it up, his own lower lip dragging across her top one before he pulled it into his mouth. He breathed heavily against her cheek through his nose, fingers curling into her hair.

Her back arched as he felt his arm wrap around her, her body pressing gently against his own. Every touch of his body pulled her further in -- leaning into the comfort. The feeling overwhelmed her, removing the concern; the guilt, if only for this moment. It may have been wrong, and if given the choice to do it again she probably wouldn’t, but as her tongue brushed against his lips, she felt like she could let go of the pain they had faced. Forget how long they had been forced to endure it alone.

Elijah looked at her when her hands went to his shoulders. He gave her another smile, dipping his head a little, “Thank you, Tatia.” He needed to hear those words. Needed to hear her say them. His head continued down just a little, setting his forehead against hers and breathing her in. After a moment his hand came  up to the side of her face, thumb skating over her cheek before he guided her face up, bringing his lips to hers.

“You’re welcome,” she whispered, a gentleness to her eyes. As he leaned in, she found herself relaxing into it -- eyes fluttering shut as she was comforted by his presence. The familiar closeness coming back to her like the last century hadn’t happened, so when his lips pressed against hers, she found herself deepening the kiss without a second thought.

Elijah looked over at her and gave her a small smile, nodding, “Yes well…I don’t enjoy feeling like this so..” he trailed off and furrowed his brows, sighing a little, “I suppose we’re both out of our element,” he shrugged a shoulder before he cleared his throat, trying to get the knot out of it.

In an effort to offer him some comfort, her hands rest gently on his shoulders -- keeping his attention on her next few words. “Whatever it is, Elijah, you are better than it,” she said with conviction written all over her face. “You will forever be the strongest man I've had the honor of meeting.”

Elijah lifted an eyebrow and tilted his head to the side a little. “Yes, lonely…I might have been with my family but I wasn’t…” he trailed off, trying to find an appropriate word, “I was still alone,” he shrugged. He furrowed his brows in confusion, “Are you alright?” he asked, chuckling a little.

A part of her knew that was what he meant. His transition into a vampire denied him many things. It put a strain on his family, but with that they became a unite; always and forever. What he truly was denied was everything else that people only took for granted. “I am fine,” she said quietly. “Perhaps I am simply... not used to seeing you so upset. I don’t very much care for it.” Her added words were followed by a soft laugh.

Elijah’s lips pulled up in a small smile when she said she thought about it more than she’d like. He chuckled quietly through his nose, nodding, “I used to think about it…for centuries..” he said quietly. “It used to be where my mind would go in the quiet of the night…Or if I was feeling particularly lonely..”

“Lonely?” she parroted, though it wasn’t intentional. Tatia tripped over her words slightly as she tried to make up for her rather abrupt question. “I’m aware that your family faced many hardships, with demons to tame... most of the time, alone. I am very sorry.” She didn’t want to push the fact that his words worried her. That perhaps, in this moment, he was feeling lonely; something that only served to confuse her.

Elijah nodded, “I’m aware,” he chuckled as he tightened his arm around hers a little before he started walking out of her house toward his home. He pulled in a breath and let it out slowly, just enjoying a still moment. His brow furrowed a little as he thought. “Do you ever think of what would have happened had my mother not turned me into what I am?”

She let his question ring out in her mind, replaying the way each word was spoken. “I used to, more than I care to admit. Especially before and when I came back,” she said in a soft, confident voice. “It was only once I had realized it wasn’t just about me that I finally came to accept what had happened, to the both of us. Now, it is not nearly as frequent.”

Elijah shook his head, “No…thank you for the offer but no,” he murmured. “I think I just want to drink,” he smiled a little. “Perhaps I’ll talk after a little alcohol but don’t hold that against me whether I do or not,” he nodded. “Bourbon it is,” he held out his arm for her. “Shall we walk to my place then? I have a feeling I have a better collection.”

“The offer was intended for you, dear Elijah,” she said kindly. “I will worry regardless of knowing what is bothering you. Instead, let us drink and free ourselves of said burden.” Accepting his offered arm, she flashed a warm smile. “I would be a fool not to agree.”

Elijah gave her a small smile and nodded, “I’m in the same boat, I’m afraid,” he chuckled a little as he shifted a bit and cleared his throat. “You need to start taking care of yourself,” he said quietly. He pulled in a breath and let it out slowly as he shifted. “I’ve been rather down lately as well…Would you want to share a bottle of bourbon with me? Or wine if you’d prefer.”

“At the risk of sounding hypocritical.. would you like to talk about it?” she said softly, her expression trying to remain neutral in tone. With a gentle nod, she answered, “I think I would like bourbon today.”

Elijah furrowed his brows as he tilted his head to the side when she said she didn’t sleep well. “Are you alright?” he asked as he watched her, his fingers fiddling with the button at his wrist. “Why didn’t you get a decent night’s sleep last night?”

“Thinking about things. All nonsense, I’m afraid. I am fine -- only tired, maybe a little too tired. I probably should have stayed home.” Brushing some hair from her face, she sighed. “I haven’t been taking good care of myself. I am not ashamed to admit it.”