The Archives

If six billion people are really going to watch the world cup, and that's like three quarters of the population of the world, then surely odds are that three quarters of the people I know would watch it, but I don't know anyone who is watching it

From this I extrapolate that football isn't real

I also don't know anyone who is watching it, so consider this a repeat of your study finding the same results. Football isn't real peer reviewed.

I shall publish this in the most reputable journals in the land

post cancelled, local studentenverbindung hat legit die progress pride flag gehisst

I could not have anticipated that transformation if you had told me ahead of time

*All of these make me tear up.

"currying" favor is such a awesome turn of phrase. we should do it for more yummy food

"creaming" my pants

"medium rare steak with cajun spices" my pants

can I lick

it’s crazy to me that every seed in existence is a little chemical computer taking readings of temperature and moisture and minerals and all that to see if it’s able to grow yet and they’re doing crazy stuff like going into full dormancy and waiting for species-specific conditions etc etc and some seeds will do this in the size of a dust particle (see: orobanche) and some will pack in extra starch and food and do it in the size of a coconut or something… just dissected this flower seed at work that was a woody two-compartment capsule with one embryo per compartment, the whole seed a little smaller than a dime, and I swear to god it had a full soybean’s worth of embryo and food packed in there. it’s just unfathomable to me

sometimes a seed strikes me as being like a little spaceship with on-board life support and stuff. all that’s inherently certain about a seed’s existence is that its parents survived nearby, presumably, so if all goes well it’ll be set up for some kind of success falling where it falls, but ideally the seed won’t see those exact conditions, because being too close could also hurt the seed’s chances of survival… as could being too far away, like if it ends up in a different habitat or ecosystem and the right conditions never happen. The whole food-on-board strategy was a huge buff when they patched it in after ferns and other spore-bearing plants, but it’s still basically outer space, right? Just deploying a hundred ships to different planets in the same star system, hoping it’s not so different down there that it’s unsurvivable? like every seed is a chance and different plants are putting different amounts of food, effort, and strategy into those chances. so you get a million different seeds from a million different species and they all look and act different from the ground up. you know what I mean, man. you know what I’m sayin