okay now that we’ve a had couple lesbian blockbusters and milfs are having a romance moment, we need to bring back the manic pixie dream girl. she was never fuckin suited to fixing all the problems of some boring twenty year old everyman, but you know who could actually benefit from a quirky free-spirited blue haired girl with pronouns (she/they)? a newly divorced forty-something mom who’s trying to learn how to be herself for the first time in her life

sorry i missed the gala of suitors i was outside picking on the weird girl in the garden tending to weird looking plants. yeah she had a little shack with a cauldron back there it was gross. anyways she gave me something to drink and now im madly in love with her so we need to start planning a wedding or whatever

Sorry I missed the crones' union meeting. The fuckingg princess showed up??? She wouldn't leave until I gave her a dr pepper. She got this really weird look in her eyes drinking it. I guess shes only used to beverages with 22 or fewer flavors

oooohh the love potion worked i cant believe you gave me a love potion im so in love its so effective lets make out

Girls im getting some real mixed signals does anyone know what she wants

hamlet production where while he explains to horatio what’s happened in denmark he’s microwaving food from the wedding/funeral that’s been in the freezer

hamlet rummages in freezer, emerges with giant costco sheetcake sloppily frosted over to read “sorry CONGRATULATIONS for your loss WEDDING !”

Tired: the Loch Ness Monster Inspired: FabulousNess