Whatever floats your goat.

You never know if today is gonna be the day that they’re gonna throw it back to you

cunt levels off the charts

Middle aged women who aren’t very well versed in social media post with a sort of instinctive savant hilariousness that reminds me of the poetry of children who haven’t learned what good poetry sounds like yet

love when i see something for me #mebait

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"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

I've seen it pointed out a few times that the various toxins mentioned above did technically have the desired effect, given humans started cultivating the plants and thus protected them from predators/insects, and spreading their seeds far and wide. I just like the idea of evolution/DNA in the examples above being like a benevolent Monkey Paw for the plants.