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GOE: Meeting the Natives
"Fucking a god would be fun... but I memt doing magic outside the bedroom as well."
Having heard of sex magic he was aware of its exhistance though hearing that it may be with this deity made things clear. The deity if the desert was quiet and calculating all of which he expected though his screaming was interesting. The way his mind worked was a thing of beauty. Shaki g his head to remove the lucivious thought he went back to what all was said.
"It is fun... for example she is going to drink the ring that he offered for proposal and his tie I going to catch fire."
Rico spoke showing the power of his visions and how annoying they could be for others. His eyes had glowed when he got them yet had returned ro their natural hazel grey color. The darkness rhat Set spoke of was the perfeption of the desert the realm he ruled over. Evil and unforgiving uet Rico saw what was hidden deep within. A well of untapped power far surpassingyhe Nile delta.
Set gave a nod of his head "Of course you did." He teased a bit, leaning forward and holding his head in his hand as he rest his elbow on the table. Smirking mischievously at the other man. Then he nodded, "But sure, let me hear about your magic outside of the bedroom."
Continuing to eye the other he wondered what exactly was going on here with this secret date. Quietly he continued to listen to Rico as he spoke, nodding his head before saying, glancing over toward the woman about to drink her ring "Oh. That will be fun." Chaotic, even, if he were lucky. Certainly with a fire. Smirking still, Set watched the couple still.
"It will be a nice show for the evening, I think." Set added after a moment.
Jacob sighed heavily, not surprised by Julian's dismissal and reaction. Could Jacob blame him? Of course not, considering his circumstances. All he could do, really, was just listen even as Julian had decided to step closer to him.
"Well, you sure told me didn't you? I mean, I'm just a soldier. Tied to the Kingdom of Hearts and forced to serve whoever wears the crown as a guardian of the gates. Fuck me after all, huh? Not even able to leave my post unless deemed allowed by the King or Queen I serve. What would I ever know about such things? The only reason we are even in this time of peace is because of the very people you speak ill against, do you really think you would have been happier with Wonderland cast into darkness?"
Surely, Julian had not forgotten but did it really matter when Julian had already made up his mind. Did Jacob think Julian was evil? Not exactly. He didn't even think Sage and Callias were, despite the terrible things they had done. If Jacob had to be honest, he had always wanted to meet her face to face.
"At least you have your freedom. At the end of the day, you are tied to noone, you aren't bound by duty to a crown. Be the hero, be the villain, be whatever you want to be. Nobody can turn back time and undo what has been done to you and at the end of the day, a good story always need it's heroes and villains, doesn't it?"
Julian glares at the others sighing. It seemed to him that all he had to say was seen as petulant nonsense by someone who couldn't understand what he was saying at all. As Jacob spoke, he cast a look to one side. His thoughts being proven as Jacob went on talking. Julian gave an irritated look "This isn't about you, Jacob. This about me, my friends, and what we did. I don't what to tell you about you having to be a knight. I didn't do that to you?!" Julian pointed out, suddenly moving forward, his anger, for just a fraction of a moment reaching a peak, his eyes started to glow green, vines moved under his skin around the eyes "Why don't you bring that problem up to my aunt!? If you hate it so much!"
He pulled back, wobbling a little as the moment of anger faded, the green washed away back to light brown, the vines disappearing from his body "Apparently, you know nothing! Because your saying that, so I'll feel bad for you, about something I have nothing to do with, and cannot change. Not now anyway!" He sighed and lift a hand up to hold his head into "Do I not have any reason for why I would speak so despairingly of them? I do not know what would have happened if Wonderland was cast in darkness. But- to me, there is no difference- between this Wonderland, an the other."
"And what am I going to do with that freedom? Suffer still? Have to watch my father continue to walk in and out of my life, and hear it as 'oh, he's just like, he's just a hare'. Well, I'm just like this, I'm just, a kid he doesn't want. I'm damaged. I did something to him that made him hate me so much, that he couldn't be around. This is just how it is. Maybe I shouldn't be free, because I'll do it again." Try to change Wonderland, so it would accept him and his friends, and not treat them as it had that made them call to the darkness to begin with "I will always try to change Wonderland. So it can be a place that I will be able to live in, too."
Julian glared at the last part though "So, you think I'm the villain? My friends and I are the opposite balance needed in this place, the evil, to what you consider good? Just a bunch of kids? Huh?"
There was a small silence between them as they walked toward the lake which Elowyn was fine with, after all, she had come out to the woods to get some peace of mind. Sure to some these woods are too creepy and dangerous to trudge alone here, which is fair because if you weren't careful it could be. However, Elowyn has felt more at home in these woods than her actual home in the city. Besides ever since she reconnected with Darrian and found out who she was - the twig snaps in the middle of the night didn't scare her as much anymore. Suppose it was a catch-22, however, she felt more secure and protected with her familiar guide, but she also knew of the creatures that linger in the dark. Creatures that made dealing with a few pissed-off spirits more welcoming.
The lake wasn't much further, and she was excited to see the moon over the lake. It's become a sort of tradition for her now. Once every month, she would come out to the lake sit under the moon, and allow her mind to wonder. Sometimes she would find Daven following her to the lake, and while she enjoyed her time alone, she couldn't deny the company was welcomed. Especially when she still had questions about what other creatures were out there and Darrian wasn't in the mood to answer questions.
"Ah, well at least you're not a full-term Tarzan." She joked. The lake was behind a few more trees and bushes. "The lake is just up ahead." Elowyn nearly jumped with joy when they came into part of a clearing with a whistling breeze across the water, the light only coming from the oversized moon hovering over the tree line and lighting the entire lake.
Smiling from ear to ear, she placed her hands on her hips and turned towards the other. "Ta-da." She motioned her hand out to the lake. "Told you it is breathtaking."
It was still a curious thing, seeing this woman out in the woods like this. So close to danger, yet so unaware of it. At least from what he could see. But one could also be in a city and be in the same situation, as well. Not knowing if they were walking shoulder to shoulder with a serial killer. Passing them by on a random street, in the middle of the nicest day you had ever seen. That person may have just ended a life hours before. Yet, people continued on, never knowing that this possibility was within inches of them. That they might be next.
He grinned at her joke "No. Not really." And wasn't he doing the same, even if he was just feigning for what he thought to be for her sake, to get her out of the hunting grounds of his household. Shin cleared his throat and looked away, nodded as they moved toward the lake she wanted to show him of this lake. Shin looked up toward the moon for a moment as they walked. Not sure what else he should be looking at, at that moment. Imagining he might give too much away if he looked behind him, or anywhere close to it. Where the family was hunting. Or even looking like he was keeping an eye out for something.
Watching Elowyn's face as they came to see this lake, he grinned in return "Oh. You're right. It is lovely." Shin complimented, sure that she was sufficiently distracted from other goings on in the night around them. The vampires were certainly close enough, they never quiet left him, as the night could be dangerous, and he was their human, he did the shopping "You ah, ever swim in it?"

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Aric hummed at what he said about his uncle and going in for the kill. It wouldn't be the first time he had to assassinate someone - but then again, he was doing so under his commanding officer's orders to execute that order. Regardless, he still had the skill set to do it, quietly and effortlessly. Maybe it was a bit strange that he sincerely offered his friend such an offer without so much as a dropping pin in his stomach to tell him that it was wrong to think that way. In his mind - the world could use fewer rich assholes in it and by the way Septimus described him, he seemed to be one of the worse ones.
"Offer still stands." He said with a playful grin and a small shrug. "Maybe shipping him off to a deserted island? That could be fun to watch." Now he was just poking fun. Perhaps. Though a deserted island sounds good to visit from time to time, just an escape from the realities he has to face every day.
There were a few escapes he could turn to, but then his shoulder reminded him of a few things and people he'd lost along the way. Clayton, Cleo, being a solider - at least an active one. He talks to Clayton and his brother every once in a while but that still doesn't replace the fact that he's mostly alone. Hence the frequent motorcycle rides and the numerous blades in his garage.
Sometimes he got to fill his time with trimming his client's horse's nails and fixing their shoes and sometimes a few hours to a couple of days of a hunt when a bounty came in. Though he often found his time unoccupied.
"Burgers sound amazing." There was an amazing burger diner not too far away from them. "Do you promise?" Aric flashed him a smirk with a wink, continuing to poke fun. "That's the only way I want it."
Aric was about to agree to going to the beach after they stopped off at the smoke shop so he could get his vapes and cigar but that last comment Septimus made stopped him in his tracks.
"I'm sorry. Did you just say sex cult?" His brows furrowed as he handed the other his spare helmet and moved his leg around his bike. "I'm going to need to elaborate on that before we start moving."
At the humming, Septimus half rolled his eyes. Of course saying some things like this to others guaranteed reactions like this. Though he wasn't desperate to kill his uncle. His uncle had life long issues, shared with his aunt and father. Septimus glanced to one side then shrugged. To hate someone was one thing. To have them be killed because you didn't like that, or to want them to die for that matter, even, while it seemed ideal to him all in all. It wasn't right. Septimus wasn't the patron of goodness, for that matter. But he was certainly not one to kill someone or want someone dead because he didn't like them, either. At least not at the moment. At least not with his uncle for the time being.
"Well, I'll keep it on the back burner." Laughing a little at the he continued "Mmm. I'd guess he'd just find his way back, anyway. But you're ight, it might be fun to watch!" That was certainly an option he could live with himself, if it happened. Though he imagined that it would not all end very well for Aric if his uncle got back and figured out what happened. Septimus might be safe, being Colden's son, but only in that Drakon wouldn't kill him. Beating him nearly to death was entirely on the table. He would, however, outright just kill Aric. His uncle super abilities weren't something to play around with, after all.
With Aric agreeing to burgers being perfect, he nodded his head "I knew you would agree!" Moving toward the motorcycle. At the question of if he was being honest, he laughed a bit, then smirked "Of course, my little spoon. I'll make sure to get in real close." Biting on his lips a moment, he squinted, trying not to crack up again. Then nodded as Aric asked about his sex cult, but laughed, again "Well, I call it that. It's not too far off, from that. But, it's, um, actually just a group of my friends that we all have this, mutual kind of relationship with. Something like, you know, polyamory. But with a twist." He elaborated as he climbed onto the bike behind the other.
A Reminder of some of my sideblogs.
@notintheipswichboyband A singular character blog for the character Chase Collins from the movie The Covenant. This blog was one that was made before deciding to do multi’s with Movie characters. Featured Muse: Chase Collins
@wrongeddeadthenevermourned A blog full of canon muses I tamper with playing from various movies or tv shows. But don’t think they are popular enough or their fandom’s too small or dying to be a single blog. Featured Muses: Kai Parker, Michael Myers, Jeff Winger, Rick O'Connell, Sylar, Diego Hargreeves, Malcolm Bright, Jayne Cobb, The Master, Pennywise, Castiel, Anakin Skywalker, Darth Maul, Butters, Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes), Leo Davidson, Chris Halliwell, Oscar Diggs, John Bender, Eugene Duckworth, Harry Hook, Graydon Hastur, Will Rodman, Jason Carvey, Technical Boy, Gregory House, Nathan Bateman, Tweek Tweak, Gomez Addams, Linus Van Pelt,
@onebadwinter A blog where I put all the superhero’s, villains, or other such kind of similar things. That I want to mess around playing. Featured Muses: The Joker, Bucky Barnes, Magneto, Baron Zemo, Jason Todd, Daredevil, Moon Knight, Killmonger, Flash Thompson, Harry Osborn, Peter Parker, All-Black, Loki, Vision,
@bloodredrosesintheforest A blog for muses that I like from books. Many muses here that have characters on shows are more because I prefer their book versions over their tv/movie portrayals. Others are just characters that have never left their book formats. Featured Muse: Viserys Targaryen, Thranduil, Sauron, Daemon Targaryen, Theon Greyjoy, Rhaegar Targaryen, Gray Worm,
@justoneneck This blog is historical based. Most muse, if not all will be loosely or mostly fictional from real life historical people. Or characters from period pieces that fit more with this kind of setting than my movie/tv show blog above. Featured Muses: Hvitserk, Ivar, Ragnar, Caligula, Achilles,
@notasliceoflife Where I roleplay anime/manga based canon characters. Features Muses: Ulquiorra, Katsuki, Neji, Dabi, Gaara, Roronoa Zoro, Sesshomaru, Sebastian Michaelis, Hitsugaya, Aizen, Vegeta, Madara, L, Killua, Itachi, Sanji, APH America, APH Hong Kong, APH Iceland,
@graceandcruelty is where I roleplay a Jekyll and Hyde muse.
@caressedorcrushed is the main blog for where I roleplay a muse that has since been moved onto my main blog. Only will be used if I am just feeling like roleplaying that particular muse at the moment.
It wasn't a question she wasn't sure she needed to answer, but it was also one that had the yes and no answers. Yes, because she was holding something her father once had, something else besides his name that could lead her closer to finding her father. No, because she doesn't know what to make of the ring…sword. Ring sword? Astrid couldn't turn to her mom about it, she would take the ring away and tell her to stop looking.
What she wasn't expecting was Briar's reaction to the ring when he smelled it. Furrowing her brows, she looked back at the ring. "It was in a cabin on the Silver Lake." She answered. "My grandma said that my mom found the lake behind the Tulgey Woods, built a cabin, and lived there till she moved into the palace with your dad." She looked up at her stepbrother and debated if she should show him what it does.
If she wanted his help, he needed to know all the information. Including the fact, the ring turns into a damn sword! "But it's not just a ring…" She started and took out the ring, Astrid looked around to see if anyone was watching too closely at them before rubbing the ring that turned into a 23' blade with black-like midnight stone as the handle.
"Briar - what did you smell?"
He frowned at the answer "That's strange." The half wolf mumbled "Just out in a cabin by Silver Lake?" Blinking, Briar shifted a little, not sure what he was supposed to make of that. To him it didn't stick out as too significant. But that ring was ominous. As Astrid further explained, he listened to her, giving a few nods of his head as she had "Oh. He's my dad now, huh?" Briar teased, then sighed. Ginevra wasn't someone he knew too much about, but then again, none of them were alive back at that time. Lyra, his own mother, didn't tell him much about her life before either.
So, he simply wrote off that Ginevra just built herself a cabin on a lake that would come to acquire he ring in question. Even though he was the oldest of the bunch, he knew nothing of Astrid's father. Just as she knew, perhaps small things were brought up, but nothing that really made the other a solid figure to Briar. Though there was something certain wrong with that ring, he didn't like it. Though there were plenty of such items that littered Wonderland, with how evil some of the citizens could be. Especially one of their previous Queens, who was so wicked it was spoken of to this day. The prior king wasn't any better when spoken about, selfish usually was the word used to describe him.
Briar frowned as she said it wasn't just a ring, "No?" He asked, tilting his head a little at that then watched as she ring as it suddenly transformed into a blackened blade with a stone dark midnight colored stone at the bottom of the hilt. Sneering a little bit he stepped slightly away, the smell of wickedness that was coming off it turning into something more suffocating for him. "I smell, it is wicked." His pupils sharpened as more beast-like features were forcibly shown on his features. His canines began to become sharper. Unthinking he suddenly reached out and ripped the blade away from Astrid's hands.
"This is dangerous." He hissed, moving his other hand to push her away safely from it, but the blade shifted suddenly, on its own, slicing Briar's arm before he dropped it. The blackness that he seen surrounding the sword pulsated. His blue eyes, now golden, locked onto it, "There's something evil about that blade, Astrid."
Truthfully, when Astrid did go to her mom with the ring, and she told her more about her father - she didn't neglect to mention that his enemies included her half brother who tried to kill her when she was a baby. Any other details were left out of the story, so, yeah - she could very well have left out a lot. But it was something she didn't need or want Kalyan to know about. Though she rolled her eyes when he stated that she thought of his human half as a weakness. Seeing how her stepfather overthrew the Crimson King of Wonderland and she admires him dearly - she never thought of humans as weak, not by a long shot. "You're here 'cause I'm sure you're too stubborn to die and neither demons nor angels want to deal with you." She murmured under her breath, not caring if he heard or not.
What she was more focused on was what he said next. He didn't plan on leaving you. So, then what drew him away from her and kept him from returning at least to Astrid? Asher has always been Ginevra's true love, but what was so horrible that kept Astrid's real father away from her? "First of all, what the hell do you mean? Why did he leave if he wanted to stay with me?" Well, there goes trying to keep her little knowledge about her father from the other. "Secondly, there has to be more than you being born a male a reason why he left you and his true love. And THIRDLY, a bunch of people gets abandoned by their parents but they don't go on murdering sprees!"
The last thing Astrid wanted or needed was another brother, especially one so hot-headed and hated the world too much. No, the only reason why she wanted to find him was to know more about their father. Yes, she knew it would probably be a bad idea but she had to know about her...their dad. So, far it's barely working and yes, she is definitely regretting it. Though as her nose flared at what he said about her mom, she watched him closely, not daring to take her eyes off of him and not moving an inch as he stepped closer. She didn't want to lose sight of whatever he was planning on doing with that ball of energy swirling in his hand. She was starting to gain some energy back herself, but she didn't want to do another round with him.
Astrid's features soften when he went on to explain how Azazael takes away his happiness. She was starting to wonder how much of it is the truth but then she also remembered that Kalyan didn't have any reason to lie to her. But before she had the chance to ask, she had to dodge that stupid ball of energy. Luckily she did, just barely - it only scaped, more like burned her right arm but it wasn't going to cause any permanent damage. "Is it so hard to have just a conversation with you, without dodging killing energy balls?" She murmured. Her blood started to boil when he thought it was a good idea to threaten her family.
"Leave my family out of this, they have nothing to do with your misery!" Well, perhaps her mother, but her stepdad, and brothers had nothing to do with it. She wasn't even sure her mom told Asher about who her father was or even about Kalyan. Now, she knew it was better to never allow any of her family members alone - she had to keep them safe. "Please be joking. If I had any contact with him, I wouldn't be here talking to you trying to get more information about him!"
Taking a deep breath, she straightened up again taking off the ring she found in her mother's cabin of her right ring finger. "This is the only thing I have of his. The only connection I have to him - my mom only told me bits and pieces about him, only barely mentioned you." She went on, getting ready to call the sword out if she needed to dodge another one of his attacks. "I just wanted to know more about him, not try to fight for my own life. That's it and you don't ever have to see me again. Or come near my family and me after this."
As she said that he shouted back "They want to kill me, asshole! That's the entire reason I hate our father. He left me defenseless only to my mothers necromancy and wanted to raise you! Because you were born with a pussy." Kalyan smirks, loving the use of vulgarity, it wasn't like it wasn't true. That was exactly why his father spawned Astrid and his other half sisters to begin with. Why he raised them and not him. Because their father was a piece of shit and he had grown tired of everyone acting like he was a monster for being pissed about having to put up with that piece of shit and his other spawn running around with heads head a little too high.
He figured they would do a lot better without heads, to be honest. But in the years since trying to kill Ginevra, he had moved on with his life, and even gotten married. Only for their father to fuck that up for him too. Kaylan narrowed his eyes on her as she begins to lecture him. He slouched, spots of blood flicking onto the ground, before leaning forward slightly, shouting "Because he wanted to indoctrinate you, you stupid bitch! But I stopped him. You're welcome!" Ugh, dealing with his idiot sisters had indeed driven him absolutely mad over the years. They just didn't get it in thier thick fucking skulls that their father did not love any of them, he just wanted to use them as weapons. But Kalyan was born a man, and that pissed their father off, because he was afraid of Kalyan's being more powerful than even him. Because he was born half human and half angel.
"Secondly, if you'd shut the fuck up and think about it. Why does he only have one male offspring, you stupid cunt! In the many, MANY, thousands of years since he decided to fall from heaven and procreate with the savages of earth, or Wonderland, in your case, whatever the fuck that shithole's like." He glanced up, half rolling his eyes. Perhaps his father always could tell he would go a little insane. But when their father tried killing him as an infant, he had other problems going on, like being hunted by the rest of the angels of heaven for breaking the rules, as well as Kalyan's mother, who kept Kalyan safe even from the angels that hunted him as God commanded them to, just as they had done their father. If it weren't for his mother, Kalyan would have died as a baby. Which is why Kalyan didn't have a problem with women, he loved his mother. He just hated his bitch sisters.
"Well this motherfucker wouldn't need to go on a murdering their siblings spree, if he hadn't spent many, MANY, thousands of years dodging angel assassin's because our father decided to fuck my mother! But I guess over there and Wonderland, you didn't have to worry about angel assassins. WHOOOHOOO. I'm Astrid and I got to have a happy childhood not dodging assassins trying to kill me and fuck up my whole life. ---EVERYTHING MUST BE SO NICE IN ASTRIDLAND!" He shouted out toward her. Making sure she could hear him from the distance he was from her. Flicking his hand out, blood dotted the ground beneath him. Before he brought it back to one of his heavily bleeding wounds. Staring toward Astrid, the one who had came all this way and done this to him, despite him not bothering her for a long time.
After throwing the energy ball, and her yelling at him about having a conversation, he laughed, looking a little insane, blood from his mouth spitting out "Are you serious!? You came here and attacked me! Now you want to sit down and have a fucking family conversation? You're lucky I'm missing on purpose!" Mostly because he was feeling too dizzy to see which one was her and which one was a double image of her, at the moment. As she tells him to leave her family out of it and that he was miserable he made a face "Bitch, I am your family and my misery should concern you! You aren't a damn baby anymore, it's time you learned some damn empathy at the age of… How old are you again?--Actually it doesn't matter." Waving his hand he brushed it off, he wasn't miserable, not for a while, but her coming here, attacking him out of no where, had reminded him of it.
Staring at the ring then as she shows it to him, he narrowed his eyes. Even that pissed him off, that stupid ring of their fathers. Turning his head slightly, he scoffed at her words, not saying anything for a long time, "Of course, you want to know about him. Not your brother. Because your brother tried to kill you as a baby, and your father. Well, he was only setting us up to kill each other, anyway." Kalyan responded narrowing his eyes on her and then started to walk toward her, "You only come to learn about you father. Huh? Then what the fuck do you want to know? That he fell from the sky's fucked hundreds if not thousand of whores. Spawned me hoping I'd be born a female so he could mold me into a weapon. But abandoned and abused me when I was born a male.-"
"Or do you want to know that he gave to the humans forbidden knowledge, that he was a blacksmith and that he was supposed to be locked in a desert for his punishment against God? What the fuck do you want me to tell you, that he was good? Because he wasn't. And I did you and our other sisters a fucking favor, chasing him off. Again, you're fucking welcome! Because you would be used as some weapon by now under the command of demons, if I had not tried to kill you as a baby!"
Rowan was the oldest of six kids - four boys and two girls (including her), her father was a marine and her mom was a prison guard. She had to help raise her rowdy siblings, so, she didn't have a delicate flower approach to things like she probably should have. No, she was more of the rub some dirt in it and walk it off kind of person. She didn't necessarily care what others thought of her, which often led to her heartless responses. An approach she knew Jackson didn't need right now. If anyone would deserve her honest attempt at being more...delicate, it would be Jackson.
Gripping Jackson's shoulders, Rowan looked right into his eyes. "I mean this with as much love as possible. Pull your shit together." Well...she tried. All she wanted was for her friend to feel more secure, or at least not have to pretend to be constantly okay around her. "You are amazing, Jackson." And no, she wasn't just saying that.
"You don't have anything to apologize for." Now she wanted to know how damaged him so much that he was turning into a rambling mess whenever he was asked if he was okay. "Let's just take a deep breath." She moved her hands off his shoulders and motioned her hands up and down as she inhaled and exhaled.
Offering him a smile, she switched her weight to her other foot. "We can talk about whatever you want." She stated, but Rowan wanted to know why and who made him so fidgety and wanted to ensure people had a good impression of him.
This was pathetic, how he was acting right now. He knew he shouldn't have been faltering like this. But it had been a rough…while. It was either crumble or explode. When he exploded, people called him a monster. Said he didn't deserve to be loved. That made him want to explode more. It made him wish he were dead. But if he did that, people would say he was doing it just to use them, to make them feel sorry for him. Looking to one side, he supposed that he really was, because he wouldn't do the same for some of those people. Obsession drove him. At least in a lot of circumstances.
He needed to be the perfect person, but also felt exhausted by doing things for others when it did not benefit himself. When he was in love, he did whatever the one he loved asked, hoping for more for himself. Could he see how horrible that was? Yes. But he didn't think it was so wrong, so why now was he letting it all get to him? It was perhaps because he felt more alone than he had ever been. Someone had stabbed right through that armor of insecurity he had been hiding behind with all these monstrous things, that now he was starting to bleed.
Though he was the only one that could see that wound, and it often made him angry when others couldn't. How dare they not see what had been done to him, he wanted to scream 'look, please, it wasn't me, not this time. I've been stabbed' But they would turn it back on him still, and say 'You're a narcissist, you're damaged. You're a monster. You probably deserved to be stabbed anyway'. So what was he really supposed to do. What as therapy supposed to do. They always told him to seek it, and yet these people who said he should seemed to need it more than he did. He was simply living the way his brain had been wired for him to live in a world like this one.
Was that really so wrong? Jackson narrowed his eyes as he thought how else he would survive this world, if he weren't thinking of himself. Or using others to meet his own ends. Maybe his love was shallow and paper thin, but while it was there, while he was still entertained and smitten by it, it was pure enough, it was good enough. He wasn't a mean narcissist. But he was one none the less. But when the world thought all narcissists were mean, were always up to something that would benefit only themselves, what did it really matter of he still was decent enough, even if his reasons were selfish. Feeling her hands on his shoulders he looked to Rowan, catching her staring at him, for a moment their eyes met, but he looked away in the next.
Her words were cold, but it was true. Whatever was messing him up right now, he had to remember, he was a monster to the world outside of himself. Selfish. Uncaring of others. Wincing, he felt a pinch in his chest, again, the invisible stab wound spilling more blood. Taking in a few sharp breathes he realized it wasn't as simple as that. Whatever was messing him up right now, making him feel heavier may not have had anything to do with his perception of the world at all. As Rowan went on he blinked "My shit is together…thank you… Just let me be sad for a little while." Though he stares back at her, surprised when she called him amazing. Maybe she wasn't like the rest, maybe she was different. Maybe things weren't so bad after all! He was amazing, the rest of the world just didn't understand that, yet.
Swallowing, Jackson listened to her, nodding his head, "I feel bad. I think I do. I'm- I don't know… I just feel awful lately." Even as they were talking his face was becoming paler, his eyes more sunken, a sheen of sweat formed over him thinly. Something more than emotional weakness was going on with him. The pinch of pain in his chest was getting worst, his heart thudded harsh against his chest and the pain started to move from their to the rest of his body, with each thump of his heart the pain stretched out, throbbing across his chest and into his limbs. Taking in a deep breath tried to do as she was saying.
But it just wasn't working "Somethings wrong with me Rowan. I don't feel good…" He said, gripping his chest. Slouching a it, he dropped his head a little. Then, shaking his head slightly from side to side, he hesitates a moment before saying "I've been feeling so alone lately… I don't understand what I did…why everyone left…Why they hate me…I did my best…They think I'm some kind of monster... I don't understand...why... why it's okay for them to do these things, but not me. Why I'm selfish when I do it. But--" Panting, he grabbed at his chest again, then continued shakily, "If they do it, it's normal."

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Tony Revolori as Graydon Hastur in Willow — 1.04 “The Whispers of Nockmaar”
spider-man: far from home teaser trailer (2019)
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Whumptober 2023 | No. 27
Scars
Willow s01e04: “I’m not supposed to talk about it.”
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The 355 (2022) Sebastian Stan
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Rubbing his face, Jaxon took an exhausted deep breath. However, he laughed at his empty threat of being arrested, because Jaxon was hindering his case. "You ask me for help, tell me to ask questions that I have, and then call me the idiot when I oblige." He tilted his head and his lips turned into a thin line. "Maybe I am the idiot for thinking you can respond without thinking you're the smartest guy in the room." Clearly, he wasn't going to find out how this ass found out Kamryn went missing and more importantly who reported him missing. Whoever did report him missing could be the person who can help them more with finding him.
The temptation to say yes to seeing his badge again was strong, though he refrained - at least from responding to the first part of his irritating sentence. "It wasn't a fight, first of all. Second of all, you kept whimpering out and running from me." Or however, he was flashing away from him. "If you want a real fight, then you wouldn't have been a coward and used your abilities." Jaxon looked back and flashed his golden eyes. "Thirdly. It wouldn't be the first time I found a dear friend's body." And not the first time he brought them back alive either. That detail didn't need to be for the other's ears. No matter what - Kamryn will be coming back home alive.
Jaxon ignored everything else that came out of his mouth flashed the rest of the way to the back and slammed the door open. Any damages he may or may not have caused, he will pay for it later. Jaxon had given him a watch that he could potentially pinpoint his location with, but he needed to grab the box that had the watch information so he could do it. Yes, he was going to check Kamryn's place as well, but he wanted to cover all his bases and make sure he didn't leave it at his shop first.
Hearing how long Kamryn was missing, made him look faster by flashing through drawers, under papers, and on the desk. Not that it was any of his business but Jaxon had to leave town to help some of the ones he's turned get out of a sticky situation themselves. He wasn't around to protect Kamryn and he was beating himself up for that.
"Clearly not." He finally answered the other's question as he walked towards the door. "Like I said before, I never seen Kamryn around anyone other than the customers he gets." Once the other was out of Kamryn's shop, he locked up and took the key with him. "You know your way to Kamryn's, yeah?" Jaxon didn't wait for his response as he walked back across the street, climbed into his car, and took off for Kamryn's.
"Sorry, you're right. I thought your questions would be more intelligent and less hostile. You can ask whatever questions you want. I'll just ignore the ones I don't want to answer, the stupid one's." He nodded his head at this comment and then looked away, staring with hazy blind eyes in a direction just so he wasn't facing Jaxon anymore. Even though he couldn't see Jaxon really at all with his blindness and all. Lockley didn't even want to see the colors of Jaxon, that's how frustrating it was at the moment "You're an idiot for thinking I think I'm the smartest guy in the room. Fortunately, I just might be. So. Can we get over this inferiority complex you have and find Kamryn?"
He rolled his eyes then, as the other complained about losing the attempted assault on their part "Fine, assault, then, of an officer. You win." Lockley said, simple as that, not really interested in enacting the proper punishment of that action onto the other. But plenty seemed to straighten up upon realizing jail or prison was on the shortlist of places they could go, along side Hell. Lockley smirked at the thought of saying that, but quickly brushed it away as he said "I like not being injured or dead, I figured you did as well. But noted, for next time. I'll fight you properly and manly." Stabbing the other in the fucking eye might get his point across, he imagined.
"Cowardly, because I wasn't playing your game? Oh please, Jaxon. Are we really in high school right now?" He asked then sighed, dropping his head "So let me get it straight. Only you can use your abilities, super human strength, correct?" He asked the vampire. Then smirks smugly "Perhaps you should check yourself. You're cowardly by your own stipulation, right?" With the other commenting on already having found a friend dead he clicks his tongue "Well if we are quick, you won't find this one dead, just so you know. But by all means, let's investigate like we are sloths!"
Listening to Jaxon rush about the room after learning how long Kamryn was missing, Lockley picked some things up and nodded as Jaxon talked "So he's an introvert, you think? Hm. Someone must have figured something out about him. And has taken him for that purpose." Leaving the shop he stood outside and let Jaxon do what he needed to do. Though as Jaxon left, he sighs again, annoyed by how insufferable Jaxon was. Then started to walk his way toward Kamryn's. Disappearing from view as he did. Some moments later he appeared on the roof of Jaxon's car, dropping into it intentionally to leave a dent "Oops. You left so fast, Jaxon, my calculations were off." He excused dropping down from the top of the car "This is where Kamryn lives, hm? Well, let's look around."