I WANT TO HAVE GAY SEX WITH THE DEVIL PLATONICALLY

and like. first of all even for people with partners that's assuming they're abled themselves and can handle all that. you can't assume that. secondly: what about people who are single, who live alone, who will probably always do so

"get someone to keep an eye on you when you start this new medication" who. "don't over exert yourself" nobody else is going to do the tasks. "this can be a walker or a transit wheelchair so your partner can push you when you get tired" my what

i had to ask my housemate to come to the hospital in a taxi, leave the taxi waiting outside, come inside to fetch me (they wouldn't even let me go from the ward to the taxi even though i could point to my phone and the texts saying that my housemate was outside), and then go back to our house with me. fortunately it was a weekend, so she didn't have to take time off work to do this, but they went on about how she'd have to keep an eye on me for the next day or so

bear in mind that i barely knew my housemate when we moved in together. we had mutual friends but it was an arrangement of convenience

Trying to get the blood people to understand that I had driven there and that no, I didn't have a partner to come fetch me and monitor me was a flipping task and a half.

I was heartbroken and felt tossed aside. I didn't understand why our friendship wasn't worth anything to him if he couldn't have me romantically or sexually. I felt betrayed and dehumanised, like I didn't matter to him as a person but only as a romantic prospect.

When I told other friends about it, to my surprise they all sided with him. "He is heartbroken, it's hard to get rejected" even my THERAPIST said this. It's not like I didn't empathize with him, but wasn't I rejected too? No one else could see that but me, they placed me as some sort of villain that had power over him in that situation, when all I did was set a boundary between friendship and romance. All I did was not consent to the terms he wanted for our relationship, I rejected them, my terms were different and he rejected those.

I've had my heart broken by friends over and over and it hurt the same, if not more, than any romantic heartbreak. Why is friendship undervalued next to romantic feelings?

i desperately need people to stop avoiding what this post is actually about. stop derailing and trying to make it be about something else instead.

THIS POST IS ABOUT ROMANTIC CONSENT.

even if the person in question didn't want to fuck them, even if he just wanted a wholesome, purely romantic, nothing sexual at all relationship, it would STILL be fucked up to BLAME someone for rejecting that.

similarly, if someone really wanted to just fuck, but they were honest and clear about that, and handled rejection gracefully, there would be literally no issue with that.

you'll never believe. whose main blog that post was from. hi, it's me, tumblr user radioactive-yuri, formerly known as thermodynamic-comedian. this is my side blog. and a good few years ago, i made that very post on my main blog.

My dad has 4 half siblings and two step siblings. They're all a decent bit younger than him. When I was a teenager, we went to a family reunion, and I realized something—my dad did not respect his siblings. He looked down on all of them. He saw them as fuck-ups and overgrown children. My dad had the American dream: well paying management job, suburban house, wife, and three kids. My aunt and uncles did not. Excluding my aunt, none of them were married or in serious relationships. They hadn't really settled into long term careers. Several of them were working the kind of jobs that get called "Unskilled labor." So he looked down on them because the youngest one was in his thirties (and several were much older), and yet none of them had "settled down" into what he saw as lifelong, permanent careers and relationships and lives. He was polite to their faces, sure, but I heard how he talked about them behind their backs, to my mother.

And then a few years ago, we visited his brothers again for Thanksgiving. And I realized something again--he respected them now. He saw them as equals. Why? Well. All of a sudden, every single one of them had serious, committed romantic partners. They didn't even need to still be with those partners—one of my uncle's fiance passed away from cancer before they could marry—just having had one showed that they matured into a real adult participating in society. In fact, at one point, my aunt was telling my mom about how one of my uncles was no longer living in an apartment she owned, but instead, after having a steady girlfriend for about a year, he moved in with her. And my mom literally said to my aunt, "wow. Look at that. He finally grew up."

One of the lines that frequently gets repeated about anti-aspec sentiment is "why would anyone hate asexuals/aromantics/etc? They aren't even doing anything." And that's exactly it. In the eyes of amatonormative culture, we aren't doing anything. Adults are supposed to do things. That's how you become a member of society.

If you identify as aromantic, Elisha, a master’s thesis student, would love to hear your story and the experiences that have shaped your identity.

The research study explores identity formation along with perspectives on romance, relationships, and the influence of societal norms.

Participation involves a confidential 1–1.5 hour interview. Compensation will be provided.

To participate or learn more, please contact Elisha (Principal Investigator) at [email protected]

This study has been approved by the University of Ottawa Research Ethics Board (S-02-26-12332), is supervised by Dr. Cristelle Audet, and funded by the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council.