You're All a Bunch of Babysitting Bastards!

Now, my partner hasn't been around horses much at all. So you can imagine my surprise when he not only became very invested in looking at random horses with me, but started actively enforcing horse ad time like it's some long-established relationship ritual we have.

After like three months of this, he has a surprising amount of opinions on horses and horse breeds despite never having been around one since he was 8. And since I kinda live for his comments on these horses by now anyways, here are some highlights:

he seems to have a nagging suspicion that irish cob yearlings aren't real, because they look too fluffy to be true. I'm with him on this

he likes Mustangs the most, because they have the friendliest faces.

He groups ottbs into the 'boring' or 'looks like a very big dog' category.

He dislikes American Miniature Horses so much that whenever we come across one, it's like he's discovering them all over again

He has developed a certain dislike for Icelandic Horses specifically. When I asked him what makes him hate Icelandics but love shetlands for example, he gave me a rather passionate explanation of how Shetland Pony ads are at least honest about selling some equine poltergeist, while Icenaldic Horse people act like they're selling Sleipnir itself. And jfc he's got a point?

Speaking of shetlands, he's a big fan of shetland sales ads and the euphemistic language they use

He also always asks me to save particularly... memorable pictures of horses to add to his growing collection. Here are some of the recent additions:

But he was 13 and an idiot and signed up to join some glorious cavalry. In reality as soon as he'd been issued a uniform they were sent on foot towards the eastern front.

He ended up captured, lost his teeth but eventually got released. It took him a couple more years to walk back home, where he worked in the trades for the rest of his life. In his home he had a small office room that his grandkids called the "horse room" as he had decorated it with paintings, newspaper clippings and the odd horseshoe.

I may have been swinging wildly at the childhood memory piñata of his, so now he's enforcing horse ad time like a cockatoo terrorizing its owner until he puts on its favourite song.

You know what you are so right... We have a bond, these 50 rats and I....

OH SHIT OH NO

WAIT