Kabobbles

“Kidnapping someone is not a sign of affection.”

Oh, I cringe. My own story is a train wreck I can’t look away from despite every wince and grimace over word choice and questionable plot.

“My life has two stages: the one where I do something embarrassing, and the one where I spend the rest of my time reliving that embarrassment.”

“My added cat difficulty increased by one.”

“My guilt went on a trip and decided to stay.”

“You act like I’m not allowed to use the toilet.”

“Being able to understand someone’s reasoning doesn’t mean I think they’re any less of an idiot.”

Parent A: “With my help.”

“Marginally human.”

“Great, now the whole world is going to explode.”

Stepping onto a hidden patch of ice in snow boots with no traction:

“How the hell should I know?”

“It’s you.”

“I thought I wanted to talk to someone, that I had something to say. Then I did say something and I had to remember why I keep my mouth shut.”

“And if I let myself think about it, it still is, so I do my best not to think about it.”

I’m not even sure what I’d write. :(

“I miss the days when I had the illusion I knew what I was doing with my life.”