I exist, and that's someone else's problem.

Who alway got in trouble? Me.

They would call my mother and she always came in and lectures my teachers and threatened to sue for making her miss work and treating me poorly.

She always taught my brothers to respect women. The only fights my brothers ever got in was defending women from someone else.

So naturally, I end up in the principal’s office, refusing to apologize. 

“He shouldn’t have put his hands on me and I wouldn’t have hit him!” That’s the only thing I was saying.

These people had the unfortunate luck of catching my dad at home, instead of my mom. So he comes fucking sauntering in there, like he’s Clint fucking Eastwood in some western movie and looks at me. 

“Melissa, did you punch him?” 

“Yes.” I said. 

“Why?” 

“Because he snapped my bra strap.” 

And he turns his squinty eyed glare to the principal and says, “You’re telling me my daughter is in trouble because that squirrely looking kid put his hands on her and she chose to defend herself? That’s what you are saying to me.” 

“Well, sir-” The man kind of stuttered because my dad is kind of intimidating in the quiet sort of way that kind of whispers in the back of your mind that this person could be dangerous. “Melissa did make it physical.” 

“No. That kid put his hands on my daughter. Are you saying my daughter cannot defend herself when some boy decides to put hands on her? Is that what you are teaching my girl?” 

The nuns there were like, so rad. 

It was a party organized for the end of the school year, and I was helping in the kitchen to prepare stuff with a nun and a bunch of little girls. There was one of the girls’ little brother who was there. 

There was a little girl who was carrying a bowl of tomato sauce and was going outside, but the boy was just in front of her and he slammed the door in her face. She dropped the bowl on the floor and got all messy. 

So what happened? 

The nun went outside, took the boy by the arm, and gave him an epic speech going around the lines of: “Would you treat the Virgin Mary like that, young man?” “Nnnnno…” “Then treat every girl like she’s the Virgin Mary.” Not only the boy had to apologize to the little girl, but he also had to clean up and he was put on kitchen duty for the rest of the day. 

Then another day, in catechism class (I was a in a girls’ school, mind you), the nun was there telling us: “If a guy touches you in a way you don’t like, punch him in the face. It’s not a sin against charity. On the contrary, you’re being charitable by showing him he’s sinning by impurity and you’ll save him from going to hell.” 

So I was at my desk during class looking like this: 

When he tried to do it to her, she grabbed his fingers and told him she'd break them if he ever touched her again. He didn't.

More recently, when I was in high school, a teacher was asking questions about my disability. After several attempts at redirecting I told him to go to hell.

The school called my mom, who said "A grown man was asking invasive questions about my daughter's body and you think *she's* the one in the wrong?"

Then I had to explain why. In front of several prominent academics and my parents.

If I were making this movie, I would have people defending this law with the sort of holier-than-thou dismissal people use in current discussions on banning porn. Are you really that horny that you can't wait? Sounds like a you problem. Studies show that people who have sex outside the Day are unhealthy and unfulfilled (because we send them to prison camps). Of course the government has the right to regulate this, what if a single person was having sex and a kid saw it? This gooner wants to have sex in front of children! Doxx them immediately!

Additionally, I would make the focus couple queer, interracial, or both, drawing on historical situations where sex between consenting adults was illegal for whatever reason. Maybe include a kid born to an unmarried mom with a birthday in the wrong time of year to have been conceived on the Day.

Basically a long exploration on how the government has no right to interfere with our bodies. The more uncomfortable the audience is with the level of surveillance required to enforce this, the better. At least one scene where the couple are dragged outside half-dressed by the police and arrested. It wouldn't be sexualized at all. Instead, their nudity would be symbolic of vulnerability and loss of privacy. Parents scowl and cover their children's eyes, even as the police refuse to allow them to cover themselves in intentional humiliation.

All that talk about trying to find "something real". Wtf. It is the sex night. Find someone hot, fuck their brains out, and worry about true love tomorrow. Or, y'know, just stay home tonight if you're looking for true love.

The flirting is forced and wooden. It doesn't feel like these people even enjoy each other's company, let alone are attracted to each other.

There's this thing I've seen straight people express from to time that I think this movie is a good example of, which is dissatisfaction with the mainstream American cishet dating scene but complete refusal to even think of trying something different.

There's a lot of people who say things like "oh, dating, tinder, etc is so stressful, but the only alternative is dying alone so I guess I have to do it" which I just find incredibly bleak. There ARE other options. I'm not even just talking queerness!

If what you want is someone to go in on starting a "traditional family" with, you could go old-school and hire a matchmaker, or get your parents to set you up with someone. It's very common even today in many cultures, and arranged marriages are about as likely to work out as self-chosen ones. There's a lot of stigma in the western world, but if all you're looking for is to get married, it's certainly an option.

If you want casual sex, you can just... Have casual sex. With someone else looking for casual sex, with a professional, or in an arrangement with a friend. Modern contraceptives keep the risk remarkably low.

If you want kids, you can have them. It's admittedly easier if you have a working uterus, but between technology and adoption many people can be a parent on your own.

If you don't want to be lonely, move in with a friend. You already like them, and it's cheaper than having coffee and fancy dinners with a succession of strangers hoping you'll magically meet "the one" and know immediately.

If you want a deep, romantic bond... Why are you trying to form one with a stranger? Your odds are probably better if you look for someone who shares an interest with you. Join clubs, do community service, go to festivals. Enjoy your life. Find someone you like spending time with even if you don't feel woozy looking into their eyes.

If I were making this movie, I would have people defending this law with the sort of holier-than-thou dismissal people use in current discussions on banning porn. Are you really that horny that you can't wait? Sounds like a you problem. Studies show that people who have sex outside the Day are unhealthy and unfulfilled (because we send them to prison camps). Of course the government has the right to regulate this, what if a single person was having sex and a kid saw it? This gooner wants to have sex in front of children! Doxx them immediately!

Additionally, I would make the focus couple queer, interracial, or both, drawing on historical situations where sex between consenting adults was illegal for whatever reason. Maybe include a kid born to an unmarried mom with a birthday in the wrong time of year to have been conceived on the Day.

Basically a long exploration on how the government has no right to interfere with our bodies. The more uncomfortable the audience is with the level of surveillance required to enforce this, the better. At least one scene where the couple are dragged outside half-dressed by the police and arrested. It wouldn't be sexualized at all. Instead, their nudity would be symbolic of vulnerability and loss of privacy. Parents scowl and cover their children's eyes, even as the police refuse to allow them to cover themselves in intentional humiliation.

"I'm in love with this person but the government forbids is from being together or showing affection" has been a reality for countless couples throughout history.

Interracial couples. Queer couples. People who aren't allowed to marry outside their religion.

Like, good news from the world, or something nice that happened in your life lately, or your favourite cake recipe, or a picture of your pet, or your favourite artwork?

Like, good news from the world, or something nice that happened in your life lately, or your favourite cake recipe, or a picture of your pet, or your favourite artwork?

Things getting generally noisier, more screens/devices, more polyester in clothing. I'm not personally affected very much by lights, but maybe lights are different???

but like, kids generally spending more time in institutional settings (daycares/schools/extracurriculars) would also do it.

I was homeschooled K-12 (for disability reasons) and I really wonder sometimes how being in a "traditional" school environment would have affected me, like, developmentally. The number one thing that I absolutely Need to function and to Want To Be Alive is the ability to separate myself from other people and take downtime when I need it.

Situations where I have back-to-back activities all day are... I don't think I've ever been truly suicidal, but I've had times when the state of being alive felt so incredibly painful that I would cry for hours multiple days a week from the sheer crushing despair of having to live and be conscious through my life.

Sensory overload isn't the exact same thing as pain, but the "hurt" or suffering of pain is itself something that is not inherent to pain and only happens with pain above a certain threshold of tolerance and processing ability. So I think it's accurate to say: in the same way that an intolerable amount of pain hurts, sensory overload HURTS.

But every kid is expected to spend more than 40 hours a week in the same room as dozens or hundreds of other kids, and basically everyone thinks of this as the bare minimum for normal social development and literally cannot imagine anything else.

That is kind of an existentially dark thought to me

And then I remember that the majority of people do things like go to concerts and go to the mall

But that doesn't fully make the horror go away

Many of my teachers in highschool considered me unpardonably rude due to things like my tone of voice, my conversational manner, and the strong opinions I had on our subject material. They were, resultantly, pretty mean to me, which increased my stress levels and made it even harder to control my own behavior.

Now that I'm in college, no one gives a shit. On the contrary, many of my professors love how engaged I am. I can pay attention better when I'm not trying to keep a vice hold on my body, and the reduced hours mean I'm much less stressed.