Dec 27, 2021
Thereโs this huge contradiction that Iโm unable to explain to people. So thereโs like this voice in my head, itโs always like I canโt even emphasize how constant it is, it keeps on asking me to kill myself. How dying is the ultimate solution. How all my pain would vanish. And then at the same time because Iโm alive, and itโs so damn human to want to do well in life given that Iโm living it. Thereโs two voices in my head. One, Iโm not allowed to act on. The second, I canโt act on, Iโm unable to. Because all of my energy, every last ounce is spent on fighting the first.
