coming of age in the quietest way

*street shot of zohran mamdani clad in nasty lil suit and hard hat* five months ago i was elected mayor of new york city. in that time, we have managed to COMPLETELY defeat the Staten Island Minotaur at no additional cost to the new york taxpayer

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

its probably a normal sign for the economy that all of my adulthood fantasies are like "imagine having your own kitchen living room and bathroom to decorate" "what if i could get on a train" "maybe one day i could purchase a sturdy pair of shoes" "i should save and invest in a single bicycle"

when you're down is basically the most classic time to be kicked

top gun is great because tony scott was like “i want to make a movie about sunsets” and the us navy was like “No you’re gonna make recruitment propanganda for the navy” and val kilmer was like “the studio has tricked me, juilliard trained val kilmer, into being here, so i’m going to portray a closeted homosexual” and tom cruise was like “i’m in a ray bans commercial!”

sunday night affirmation: the anticipation is worse than the experience the anticipation is worse than the experience the anticipation is worse than the experience the anticipation is worse than the experience

how to get up in the morning tutorial

how to get up in the morning walkthrough

how to get up in the morning tips and tricks

get into watching sports if you like going to sleep pissed off