characters: you x yuta ft. johnny
genre: slight angst, fluff (?)
preview // You’d had been trying to build a wall since he stepped in because you knew subconsciously that you would fall for him at one point but when he looked at you like that you couldn’t refuse.
“Please for the love of God let him stay with you,” she begged and pleaded for the sixth time today. “You always let me stay at your place over days on end when I’m in need,” she moaned loudly into the receiver causing you to jerk your ear away from your phone to avoid the screeching, “so why not now?”
You rolled your eyes in annoyance and took a deep breath before replying to your best friend’s unreasonable request. “Look Jess, my home is your home ‘cause you’re like my sister. I refuse to house a stranger.” You heard her inhale to refute that he wasn’t a stranger, that he was her really good childhood friend from years ago but that was of little relevance to you, “I don’t care if you’re close to him, I don’t even know his name.”
She made out an inaudible mixture pleading words and whining sounds before going back to convincing you, “it’s only for until he finds a new place. His landlord mixed up the apartments and now he has nowhere to crash and you’re the only one I know who has an empty place. Please, please, please!”
Although that situation sounded awful and you’d want someone to take you under their wing if it had been you in that exact situation you didn’t know what the person might do and you could barely keep your own apartment from looking like a wreck nevermind adding another individual to mess up the place. Deep in your thoughts, you started to look around your apartment; it was minimalist and had very little furniture to occupy the small yet cozy space and an extra room for storage that you had never gotten around to fill. With this much room and no real reason to say no rather than your own discomfort you had overcome that feeling with guilt and finally complied. “Fine. I’ll do it. But make sure he pretends that I don’t even exist.”
“Are you sure about that?” Jess teased, “he’s quite the looker and I know you haven’t dated in a long time.” You vividly pictured an image of her wiggling her eyebrows at you suggestively by her tone of voice through the phone.
She might’ve been true but after an epiphany a few nights ago with the help of two glasses of wine and 2 slices of fudge cake, you realized that you should stop pushing for things to happen and for love to knock on your door instead of the other way around. “Don’t push it.”
Jess laughed in defeat and told you that she was sending him on his way before hanging up the phone. For a moment you slunk into your ironically uncomfortable ergonomically designed office chair and laid your hand on the top of the seat so that you were looking up at the illuminated white ceiling. You didn’t know what to expect and the nerves of housing a stranger finally hit you; finding an apartment would take a long time, was he a creep or just plain-right annoying, or what if he accidentally plugs out your computer one day while vacuuming to help you out but you end up kicking him out but then taking him back in because you felt bad.
You collapsed your head onto the desk in front of you with your forearms on top of each other to cushion your forehead from banging on to the solid surface. Multiple irrational scenarios were occupying your mind just because you were socially awkward and never had a roommate other than a female friend or a family member before. As if having the lack of a romantic life, deteriorating social skills, and grades slipping faster than you could help yourself was bad enough, now you had the only comfortable place that you had to yourself was essentially stripped away from you no matter how nice your new roommate was.
Before you could have more minutes to spare sulking and pitying yourself, you heard an erratic amount of knocks and kicks to your door. “Are you actually kidding me Jess,” you huffed while dragging your furry slippers across the floor, “do you not realize that it’s midn-”
“Hello, heard you were kind enough to lend me a room” a handsome man smiled as soon as you swung the door open angrily thinking it was Jess with her usual rowdy behaviour that always gathered a list of complaints from your fellow tenants. ‘Handsome’ and ‘smile’ were quite the understatements; he was undeniably attractive especially with his wavy brown locks sticking to the sweat on his forehead and the dim hallway lights that practically twinkled in his eyes when he showed you his toothy grin although he was carrying a giant box- Holy shit you were too busy checking him out to realize that he had been carrying up his whole entire luggage up the stairs.
“Oh my god I’m so sorry,” you spluttered before opening the door wide enough for him to maneuver his way through the small entryway. “Should’ve told you that this place doesn’t have elevators.”
He set down the large cardboard box and wiped the perspiration dripping down his neck with the back of his hand. “No, it’s my fault for being cheap and not using a moving company.”
You were expecting him to retreat back into the hall to move in at least one more box or bag but all he came with were the clothes on his back and a beat up looking box. “That’s all you have?” You asked closing the door slowly just in case he was catching his breath and was bringing in more of his belongings but he shook his head and close the door himself with the large palm of his hand.
“Nah, I just brought the essentials and had planned to get everything shipped out to my new place from Japan just in case something came up,” he leaned against the door after turning the lock. “And just my luck, it did.”
You cocked your head to the side, fascinated by every single word that he said and every single one of his mannerisms that he displayed. “Good planning,” you said as his head slightly lolled against your door as he gazed down at you with relief. “So Japan huh?”
The worn out man was suddenly hit with a burst of energy as he seemed to forget to introduce himself to the kind and attractive girl in front of him, slightly embarrassed at how lazily he presented himself in front of her. “Yeah, my name’s Yuta. Nakamoto Yuta, sorry for the late introduction.” He rubbed the back of his neck in his nervous habit but silently resented himself for doing that as he couldn’t shake her hand now that it was covered in sweat.
You introduced yourself and gripped the two open holes on the side of his box to lift it up and bring it into the storage room where you had planned for him to stay but as your knees straightened from your squatting position to prevent throwing out your back, you started to stumble backwards.
“Careful,” Yuta chuckled beside your ear as he stabilized you with his big and callus hands around your elbows. He turned around so that he was in front of you and took the box with ease and nodded his head, a signal to lead him into his temporary room.
“Thanks,” you said quietly under your breath before turning swiftly onto your heel and into the room that you had prepared haphazardly for him; now regretting it as he was nicer than you had expected him to be. But was his angelic face alluding to that impression of him as you only had interacted with him for less than a good five minutes or was it because he genuinely seemed that way. “Uh sorry for the messy space,” you cringed as you glanced at your random mish mash of toys that you had never had the heart to toss out or donate and all of the ugly and amateurish paintings that you did to relieve stress.
He set his things down and placed his hands down on his waist as he looked at the same room that you were looking at but he interpretation was entirely different. “I like it,” he smiled. You stared at in with your brows knitted in confusion but he didn’t look down at you, too fascinated with the contents surrounding him. “I don’t know what kind of person you are, but if I did I would think this room is a good reflection of you.”
You scoffed, “messy, dusty, and filled with waste.”
Yuta frowned at how you described what he thought what was like your own personal art gallery, “it’s not waste if you like it right?” You shrugged and twisted your mouth from side to side searching for an answer to his rhetorical question but you ended up speechless. “If in that moment it kept you happy then you shouldn’t be ashamed of keeping it.” The slight shame that you had was lifted like a boulder off of your shoulders and all that you could do was look at him in awe, you had never heard anyone justify your attachment to the past in that way before. “Sorry, getting all philosophical on you.”
“No,” you said quickly. He finally faced you and scanned your expression, amazed at how his simple and honest words had affected you so much. “That makes me more comfortable, which reminds me I should let you get to unpacking.”
“Not much to unpack,” he laughed. You were turning to the door but before you could close it behind you he called out quickly, “anything I need to know?”
You thought about it for a second before poking your head through the small space between the door and the frame, “I’ll lay down the house rules when you’re done.”
When Yuta saw the door unravel from your grasp from the other side of the door he had released the wide grin that he was desperately trying to hold back when he was with you. ‘House rules,’ he thought, ‘cute.’ Curiosity was getting to the best of him and although his muscles were screaming at him to slow his pace of placing his items around the room, he rushed to hear what rules you had set out for him. But when you had set two cups of coffee in front of him and started telling him what you had wanted, he was nothing short of disappointed.
“That doesn’t seem quite fair,” he murmured as he sipped the fragrant coffee that coated his stomach in warmth. “Do you dislike me already?”
“No! No!” You quickly rebutted. “It’s just that I don’t want us to bother each other.” You looked down at the milk still swirly in your coffee from when you first poured it to avoid his sincere and confused stare.
“I understand that but ‘pretend I don’t exist?’ Isn’t that a bit much?” He gently stroked your hand that was cupping your mug with his fingertips, “I’ll make you regret those words and be the best roommate that you ever wished for.” You’d had been trying to build a wall since he stepped in because you knew subconsciously that you would fall for him at one point but when he looked at you like that you couldn’t refuse.
And both of what you predicted was true.
For the next few weeks, time had seemed to fly by faster than you had wanted them to. Every single day you’d wake up to a freshly brewed cup of your favourite tea or coffee depending on how tired you were and you reciprocated with his usual breakfast of oatmeal and strawberries although you couldn’t stand the sickeningly sweet smell in the morning. Since his classes usually started in the evening he would pack you lunch, and you would welcome him home with a hot home cooked meal with all the recipes from his mom who he had always gushed about.
Living with him seemed like a dream, you had felt like a college couple rather than a pair of accidental roommate and you knew when it was time for him to leave it would be hard to bare but you let yourself fall in love with him anyways.
“Hey!” Yuta called from the kitchen. “Wake up lazy, how naps do you take each week? Hurry up the food’s getting cold!” The one time he decided to cook dinner, he had to make a big deal out of it you thought as you squeezed your eyes shut as if it would also block out his nagging. You heard the swishing of slippers against your wooden floor but smiled when you didn’t feel Yuta nudging you awake as he would usually do. “Rise and shine,” he said softly in front of you, making you shriek when you realized that his face was only centimeters from yours.
Unlike you, he was perfectly calm and sauntered to the dining table, waiting for you to join him. “You’re annoying you know that?” You sighed, trudging your feet towards him. “Also nice apron,” you shook your head while chuckling at the printed white and pink roses that made him look like a housewife straight from an infomercial.
“Take it off for me,” he smiled with his arms held up in a straight line so that you could untie it for him.
“You have arms, you can do it yourself,” you rolled your eyes before sitting down.
He pouted and started to shake his arms that were still in the same exact position, “same arms that cooked for you c’mon don’t be difficult.”
You groaned and sat up from your seat quickly and started to unravel the knot that held the strings of the apron close to his toned body until you felt his arms wrap around your back and hug you lovingly. “Creep,” you exclaimed using both of your hands to shove him away from you.
Yuta plopped down into his chair in defeat while a stupidly cute beam spreading from ear to ear, “I am oh so sorry, consider this meal an apology,” he said while twinkling his fingers across the wide menu of Japanese food in front of you.
You clapped your hands together in front of you in awe, “please introduce them.”
He smiled at your excitement and started pointing at dishes that were in front of you to the ones nearer to him, “that’s just plain ol’ miso n’ rice, that’s tsukemono which is pickled vegetables, uhh hmm how do I explain the next dish…” Your eyes started to wander from the dishes to look at his concentrated face which was deep into thought to try and explain to you what the large grilled fish in front of you was. “I don’t know what kind of fish it is but I just know it from it’s appearance but it’s salted and fried. Nothing special.” He’d noticed that you were daydreaming while peering at his face; he shifted his gaze at you abruptly and placed his entwined hands under his chin. “Looking good?”
You coughed when your eyes had adjusted and realized that you had been staring for an uncomfortably long time, “let’s eat!” You picked up your chopsticks and placed the small cubes of silky tofu from your small bowl of miso soup into your mouth, it instantly melted and crumbled under between the roof of your mouth and your tongue. “This is really good!”
Your cheeks had started to rise in temperature when you saw that Yuta was in the same exact position, still intently fixated on your face enjoying how much you liked his cooking. “You had a piece of tofu honey, it’s that good?” Your face had scrunched up after that statement when you had just simply said what was on your mind but he picked up his chopsticks and removed the spine of the fish so that he could remove a piece of soft white meat and place it on top of your mountain of rice, “there, try that.” Once you scooped the rice and meat into your mouth, your eyes widened at him and your head nodded vigorously signifying that it tasted amazing. “Glad you like it, because I have something to tell you.”
You frowned slightly, when he had good news he usually was brighter and more cheerful, basically spewing rays of sunshine everywhere he went but when he had bad news he always said it with a smile and an almost nervous tone when he always seemed calm and relaxed. “What is it?”
He placed a mouthful of food inside his mouth and finished chewing before answering you, “I found a nice apartment. I think I’ll be moving out soon.”
“Oh,” was all that you could say to him since a jumble of words were refusing to form inside of your head to compose a literate sentence as the thought that he was never intending to stay for a long time had totally flew across your head. How could you forget that? Did you really think that you could play house with one of the most attractive, kind, and funny person that you had ever met and have him reciprocate the same feelings as you? “Uh that’s really good, I’m glad you finally found somewhere.”
His gaze was set on the window, revealing the bright city lights and moon covered by soft wafts of translucent white clouds that were brushing by pushed by the night wind. “Can you believe it’s been a month?” A month? That long already? His tone was melancholic and you had set down your chopsticks before even realizing it.
“When are you leaving?” You managed to choke out. You gulped down your tall glass of water to hide the fact that you were shaking from your voice to your hands.
“Tomorrow,” he said with a completely straight face, an expression that he had never showed to you before.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” You were hurt as a plethora of questions were rushing through your mind as well as the blood that was pounding in your head. Did he want to get out of here as soon as possible? Did the time together mean nothing to him compared to what it meant to you? “Do you dislike me that much?”
Yuta walked over to your side and kneeled on one knee in front of you, you tried to avoid his gaze as you could feel tears accumulating in your eyes but he cupped your face with one of his hands and the other was resting on top of you hand. “How could you think that? Does me leaving make you that sad?” You knew that if you had answered then the tears that you were forcing in were going to release so you did simply nodded and turned away. “Then be mine. Date me.” Your eyes widened and it was although his soft words had dried your tears.
A moment ago you were hating yourself for ever liking him, for giving him your emotions but now you were trying desperately to close them off as you had never envisioned this of happening. “I don’t think I’m ready.”
He smiled and quickly pecked your cheeks with his lips, “alright. I’ll miss you then.”
And that was the last thing he had said to you before he had left the next morning as you two were too bashful to say anything other than goodbye.
For the past week since he’s moved out you didn’t bother going into the storage room, you didn’t bother to use the kitchen and make food like you had used to and all that you could do was cry and sulk in your bedroom. It wasn’t like he had ghosted you or had fell off of the edge of the Earth, it just didn’t feel the same when you had met up with his quickly for coffee.
But as you were cramming on a Friday night to finish your Biology seminar with your less than helpful partner who you knew would rather be going to a crazy rager, you suddenly got a text from him asking if he could come over and pick up something that he had forgotten. Almost instantly, you shamelessly texted him back and told him he could come over anytime of the night which you regretted as that became the only thing occupying your mind.
When you returned to your laptop set on the dining room you looking over to the left to see Johnny rummaging through your refrigerator, “may I help you?”
“I finished what you wanted me to do,” he said indifferently.
You nearly stood up from you chair from his words, out of all people you would never expect him to put an ounce of work. Your fingers were quick to scroll through the slideshow presentation for your seminar and you were enthralled to see that not only did the visuals look amazing but the content was also up to par. “This is too good to be true,” you muttered. Your head whipped towards his direction, making him jerk back a little bit in surprise, “this isn’t plagiarized right?”
His tall and lean body leaned against the fridge door, “considering that I paid for my own tuition with my own money I can’t afford to get kicked out, also thank you for thinking so highly of me.”
You walked over to the fridge and ignored his snarky remark, “what are you looking for? You’re adding more onto my electricity bill.”
“You only have orange juice and soy milk,” he muttered. “I’d like a reward drink for all of the work.”
You looked at the last bottle of soju at the very bottom right corner of your fridge and snatched it up before closing the door, “sharezies?”
Johnny scoffed and opened the bottom cooly by slamming it on the corner of the dining table while you grabbed two shot glasses from your cabinet. Both of you sat the opposite of each other and as soon as you started to pour his share his eyes stared lasers into the glass. “Are you that desperate for alcohol?”
“I was just asking for a refreshing glass of coke maybe or some sparkling water but this isn’t too bad either,” he grinned.
And just like that both of you were down to your last shots, and like the light-weight you were you were about to be completely out like a light. Once you and him gulped down the last drops of the bottle, you were collapsed face down on the table. “Oi I didn’t think I would be taking care of you out of all people on a Friday night,” Johnny snarked.
“Leave me alone,” you sighed. “Just go home, I’m safe here anyways.”
You felt the tip of his elbow knock the smooth wood of your table, the vibration of his small action was washing through your forehead making you groan in slight pain. “I don’t think so. What if you throw up and choke on your vomit?”
You sighed and lifted your head up slightly so that you could rest your elbow on your forearm and glare at his smug face which was supported by his hand on the side of his face acting as a pillar. “I’d rather have that than you stay here any longer.”
He pretended to hold his chest in pain, his face scrunched up as if your statement was an arrow to his heart. “Ouch, I will take my leave then m’lady.” You waved him off as he stood up clumsily and heard him put on his shoes loudly as he kept slapping your walls to keep balance. The cold breeze of the door opening soothed your throbbing headache that was progressively getting worse. “I think you have a visitor,” Johnny called out.
You turned around to see who he was talking about and saw Yuta with his bangs covering his eyes, hiding his expression. You couldn’t deceiver if it was hurt or just pure anger at your audacity to have another man at your place when you rejected him. As you stared at him to try and decode it Johnny looked at the two of you innocently and read the situation, “I guess I’ll leave them. Thanks for today and good night.” He closed the door behind him and left a lingering trail of the night breeze.
Yuta stood motionless for a second and let a small chuckle out before tossing the keys in front of your feet as you stumbled upwards to walk over to him and explain but it felt like he tried to stop you from coming any closer to him. “If you didn’t want me then you could’ve just said so,” he said.
“Yuta no that’s not- I really do like y-” you stopped yourself. Although that statement could fix this ordeal and finally draw the line between you two you couldn’t bring yourself to say it.
He finally brushed his bangs to the side and revealed his glossy eyes. He wasn’t angry or hurt, he was betrayed. “I wouldn’t have waited.”
“Yuta please!” You ran out of the apartment after him and made it to the stairs that were outdoors and freezing as you didn’t bother to slip on any footwear. “It’s not what it looked like, we were working on a project and had a little celebration drink and I sent him off I wouldn’t-”
“You don’t need to explain.” He stopped your trail and walked up the steps so that he was of eye level with you. “You made it clear to me already.”
Before he could turn around and start making his way down the stairs again you grabbed the tips of his fingers and slunk down on to your knees. “I’m scared of liking you.”
You heard silence for a moment and felt your heart drop when his fingers slipped out of your grasp. The tears that you didn’t even realize were forming had overflowed down your cheeks until you saw Yuta bend down and wipe them off. “Why? Why didn’t you tell me?” His eyes were now clear and sincere, making you pour out your feelings to him. “I thought if something happened then I’d be happy but I push everything I love away from me.”
He smiled softly and lifted your chin up so that you were looking directly into his eyes. “Didn’t you always say how you wanted love to come knocking on your door? That you wanted things to happen naturally? Then don’t push it away. Like how you keep your nick knacks with you when we first met, if you like something there’s no reason to push it away.”
And slowly his lips pressed softly against yours, nearly tickling your before he pulled you into a hug.
It was more than merely a kiss to signify the start of your relationship but more of his comforting you and telling you to live and love regrettably.
yousharknotpass
2087
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