Gender? I don't even know her!

i like it when people compliment me. i like it... when people like me. (looks around to make sure nobody is about to shoot me)

This isn't just for cults either! Shitty partners, bosses, friends - they all do variants of this where if you kick back the first time they make an unreasonable request, it proves you weren't ever committed since you'd let such a small thing ruin everything. And of course, if it's the third or the tenth unreasonable thing they ask of you, it's SUCH A SMALL THING to be a deal-breaker at this late point in your relationship!

customers the same in all universes

this is it. this is the best response i’ve ever received on this post. everyone pack up, go home, we’re done here

Back at it again but I was actually having a joyous and whimsical time reading fanfiction about Parker and Arthur (shout-out to @rosesofenvy you are the backbone of parkthur fics to me) and was like "wow I should listen to some of the episodes with him :]]]" before I Realized

I wonder if the fan mail comes directly to their office address. If so, Faroe has probably seen it. Instead of suspecting that Arthur is lying about Big Stuff, I'd love for her to actually just think he is badly hiding his secret identity as John Doe the mystery writer.

Arthur needs to pulverize that evil jaw and spread little bits of the evil jaw dust in random locations all over the world. Alternatively, he and John could pull a Dekker and employ the divine power of concrete. This is not your first Nightmare Realm rodeo, boys. This is your second rodeo. That is plenty of rodeos to understand you should NOT keep tethers that malevolent entities can use to escape pocket dimensions.

Now I don't think MANY problems would be solved doing this, in fact I think a lot more would come of it, but I'm just saying if Arthur and Kayne did it consensual-but-not-safe-or-sane cannibalistic hate style i'm pretty sure he would've calmed down a Little Bit.

I am unfortunately compelled by the power of friendship. Specifically in medias where it doesn't belong. Have they even tried to make friends with the monster hellbent on eating them? That's what I thought. They haven't tried everything. Go back to the drawing board and make it friendship bracelets. That's how to save the world

Arthur lester adores monologues. Do not let him talk for more than one minute he will start monologuing about what the fuck ever

Why do you think he loves John so much? John's a constant monologue

John Doe voice: "Orthur, i dont think we can get out of this one. You need to Lock In Orthur. Orthur listen to me, the world kinda really sucjs right now, but if you hold my hand we can do this together, a burden shared is easier than carrying alone. We must stand together to make it theough this day Orthur. Now go kill that Orange Cunt."

Okay very random here but can you IMAGINE being Thresholdthur though. Just for a moment. I have not been able to stop thinking about this. Like imagine not only do you have to decide whether or not to tell your loved ones what happened to you during the worst most agonizing 6 months of your entire life, decide how you'd do that, even how you;d talk to them again in the first place etc etc, but ☝ EVERY single one of them is Religious and also Reliant On Said Religion In Some Way. And Arthur "got violently dismembered by the son of God" Lester kind of just has to be ok with that. what. Arthur "got vented to about how little said god cares about anything at all and how that very carelessness almost ended the world and proceeded to say that that wasn't a God" Lester? THAT Lester? Like yeah I get telling them is a bad idea and would be pretty fucked up but also there would be that naggingggg anxiety and urge to just spit it out and honestly I don't think I could've dealt with that 🥹

Malevolent Threshold is making me realize that maybe Arthur "pathetic wet kitten" Lester might not actually be THAT pathetic and that he was going through significant mental hurdles and also getting stabbed and every bone in his body broken and honestly going insane. That being said he does NOT need to whimper that much when he walks up stairs