Pallas's Palace

you people aren't CASTING

you people aren't CASTING

you people aren't CASTING

The children yearn for the mines

I WONT LIE FOLKS, THIS WHOLE YEAR HAS BEEN AN EXERCIZE IN STOPPING THE BLEEDING. BUT *CROWD LAUGHS* THAT DOES NOT CLOSE THE WOUND *UPROARIOUS LAUGHTER* NO IT DOES NOT.

I’ve always wanted to go to a house party like you see in movies but I never found out about any. Was too busy in the monastery where I was trained to kill

I'm not gonna lie the secret to success for a great many people is absolutely stimulant abuse

When people bitch and moan that conservative comedians are getting “cancelled” I want to grab them by the throat and scream at them that the Director of The Matrix One of The Most Successful Action Movies Of All Time can’t get funds for another movie because she’s transgender.

I have ZERO DOUBT that her being trans and focusing on a trans cast is a large part of the reason, but I think Jupiter Ascending bombing probably has a little to do with it

Speaking from experience, the "normal to want and possible to attain" meme has been revolutionary for the "abnormal to want, impossible to attain" crowd

(thinking of something I want) is this normal. Is it attainable

I love living in 2026 because I go to Home Depot and buy a 5-gallon bucket for $4. I say I do not want an email receipt. They know my email anyway because I once ordered a mop online. They email me to ask how I like my 5-gallon bucket. I do not reply. They email me again. They would like my feedback. Reminder ‼️I have purchases to review. Did my 5 gallon bucket live up to my expectations? 3 minute survey!!

i think everyone would majorly benefit from swapping "im just a girl" with "im literally nice"

"im just a little guy" is not ❌ a good alternative for "im just a girl". Either youre literally nice or you are lost in a harrowing desert where only the bones of titans from a bygone era remain

Geological horror. You find a geode and crack it open and the crystal lining its walls is human blood that can't be genetically matched to anyone. You find a human skeleton but every one of the bones is made from rock, a rock that you know can't be whittled into those shapes. You find layers of clay and loam that sport ancient fossils at the top and the still-rotting corpses of modern animals at the bottom.

This reminds me of the blood river in Antarctica. For like a century scientists had no clue why this river looked like, acted like, and felt exactly like blood. Turns out it’s just really high in iron.

Blood Falls isn't just high in iron, it's the byproducts of extremophile bacteria that have been isolated under a glacier in a iron- and sulfur-rich anoxic brine for the past 5 million years.

they added another luftballon while you were sleeping