Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Qualityβ Free Actions
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
βi have to listen to my bodyβs needsβ secret boss fight written by person who has chronic and disabling wrist pain which has fundamentally changed his relationship to his hobbies and his job <- i care it as someone who has also had chronic pain in my wrist/hand for 5 years
another thing i tend to think about with this. i also just think in chapter 5 there's a theme of care and dependency. the flowers have extreme guilt over being taken care of by asgore. flowery conceptualizes himself as weak and useless. in the dark world, his fantasy, he tries to return the care given to him to asgore to "make up for" asgore taking care of him when he should've died decades ago. it's an extreme example, but i also resonate with his feeling.
when your body or mind puts you in a situation where your reliance on other people becomes really explicit, you're trained by the world to see that as shameful or to see yourself as deficient. your efforts to ignore your needs just to avoid "being a burden," will leave you worse off. you punish yourself because of deeply internalized ableism.
regardless, even by virtue of being a living thing on this planet, you are already designed to need others. you have to listen to your body's needs even against a society that teaches you you shouldn't. you have to be okay with the fact that you have needs. sometimes your needs are different or are greater than the person next to you, and all you can do is listen to your body and turn to others when you need them. you're still a person when you need people.
when toby says this:
it's interesting to me how much he uses the language of deltarune to express this feeling. your hopes and dreams slipping away, and bitterness growing is literally the explanation we get for shadow crystals (and so wept the fallen star, making rivers with its tears. then, slowly, from the bitter water, something grew. it looked like glass). this is also the crushing feeling when you lose a sense of control when you're in pain, when you can't do things the way you want, the way you used to. but when you find yourself still able to fly, you do so because you've adapted. you've listened to your body. you've learned that listening to your body means changing the pace, letting yourself be cared for, letting yourself be helped.
as far as toby's said it, having to expand his team has made deltarune a better game. chapter 5 is so expansive because so many people helped to make it. Pink's fight has sprite work from guest artists, music with Camellia, bullets programmed by Toby's team. She is, to me, a love letter to Deltarune's development process as a whole and how it has shaped Toby, and a reflection of the kinds of thoughts Toby has shared with us about developing Deltarune alongside pain. I also think it's a beautiful follow-up to Gerson's themes of storytelling and authorship (letting go of "perfection" + accepting the contributions of others = both about rescinding control and embracing perseverance). Pink is also so much more than this, but I've been thinking about this a lot.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Qualityβ Free Actions
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
i love you archival work. i love you alphabetizing. i love you sorting. i love you reshelving. i love you document restoration. i love you shelf reading. i love you inventorying. i love you analysis. i love you archival work.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Qualityβ Free Actions
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
Pink's shop in chapter 5 has some of the most emotionally poignant text in the game for me. Just like, the way that she's in this world and she's finally found herself and the first thing she does is appreciate the world in front of her and get lost in the beauty. The way she talks about how she never realized she was lonely until she was finally herself, and now she wants to make new friends and meet people. The way she talks about names and bodies. Bizarre to me that a lot of people apparently got nothing out of that all, it's really well done and I think about it a lot
heyyyy have my take on the flowery survives au. first image is my initial sketches from several days ago and the second one i did today because i wanted to change up the wheelchair.
yapping about my thoughts below the cut!
before i get into this i wanna apologize if i get anything wrong! ive done about enough research to form these thoughts but i havent gone super in depth and im also not the same flavor of disabled as im trying to picture here so i wouldnt really have much experience to relate back to either. if anyone would like to correct me or give me some helpful insight it'd be much appreciated! ^-^
ok so. i know this bitch was patched back together by a bunch of duct tape and a dream but i dont care he's surviving through the power of friendship. hes basically an anime protag
ive seen other people just give him a cane and/or a brace around his waist but that slash went THROUGH him. i feel like whatever equivalent he has to a spine got FUCKED UP when the knight attacked him- so if he's surviving that he's losing the feeling in his legs at least.
I've also seen someone point out that the slash also hit his shoulder, and didn't just go through his middle, so i'd say he'd have a bit of difficulty with that aswell. But he's mainly paraplegic, with his legs being completely out of commission and slight feeling in his waist due to the slash being at an awkward angle.
ive also (i know, AGAIN, im sooo unoriginal.../silly) seen some people say his waist would be a little offset because of how susie taped him back together and i like that too. shame i was NOT thinking about any of this when i made the very first drawing in the first image. now i look STUPID. (not really im cool as fuck) but anyway.
i also feel like he'd be alot less energetic than before, and would have days where the pain of his wound flares up and he doesn't really feel like doing much. but with the kind of guy he is, he'd of course try to cover all of that up and keep trying to be the strong, confident, carefree older sibling/friend that everyone looks up to. he can never let anyone down, no matter how he himself is feeling. despite his new almost completely life altering circumstances, his determination won't be swayed! in fact, maybe it's come back even stronger! he might never be able to move like he once did before, but he'll make the most of it anyway and continue to be fucking awesome.
speaking of not being able to move like he used to, his powers. i think due to his tendancy to now get more easily tired, and the fact he shouldn't move too harshly otherwise he might reopen his wound (atleast in the first month or so of healing) his powers would be limited aswell- atleast the ones that made him able to fly and teleport(?)- he'll still be able to use them, but he'll have to be more careful with himself, and he can't use them for long otherwise he tires himself out. i think this would lend to some creative workarounds though, like doing some awesome fucking jarona-powered wheelies in his wheelchair. this last part might not be the most serious in the world but what is a toby fox character without some ridiculous bullshit going on inbetween the real moments? just picture him swerving right by you at top speed with a rainbow trail behind him. he's still just as insufferable as before <3/aff
i think that covers all the basic thoughts i have about the au. ill certainly be talking about it more in later posts when i draw for it again c: thank you for reading my silly ramblings!!
An older noodle thing to vent out my heartache.
The ending should've been a bit different, but it has been left unfinished for a long time and I want it out of my drafts. It was a finishing speedrun today.
Tfw dearly loving another is the same as loving yourself because you are basically the same person. Making friends with them is making friends with yourself. And to love yourself is to live life again.
(And that goes both ways.)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Qualityβ Free Actions
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
germansingergirl
gummygunk
pixelskylines
prguitarman
kianamaiart
2087
yousharknotpass
theartofmadeline
