C'est La Vie

there's nothing here for me.

i am a waste of space.

i am doing nothing with my life.

i need to be able to support myself but no...

i can't even afford to live on my own.

i am holding my family back from living.

just...ugh.

nothing impressive has happened in my life. i work full-time for a swim school still (drag). i know i am worth more. i was hoping to leave last summer, but i stayed. i get comfortable and it's going into the unknown again that scares me to leave.

however...

the first day of february 2024, i paid of my auto loan (1.7 years early might i add).

i also got a pay raise (not on time, unfortunately) in December 2023.

with all of this, i am going to spend the next few months focusing on saving more and building a cushion. i am going to be applying to other jobs in the coming months and hopefully leave. i have put in 4 years at this place, which is longer than originally planned. this job was supposed to be temporary while i was in school for the occupational therapy assistant program. i couldn't pass a specific class and after 2 years, i decided to move on. i wasn't even in the program yet.