Should you be ashamed? Or better not..
Hey! (to whomever might be reading this)
Today I heard a story (via Instagram) of girl which is now 30 years old, but when she was just 11 she very purposely "pleasured herself" for a moment or two on a table corner. By doing so she was thinking that she has discovered something amazing and just wanted to share it with her family. The reaction wasn't as expected, instead people froze, felt uncomfortable or ashamed. - But why? Why are we so afraid not only of our own sexuality, but others as well? Is it religion? Or society at fault? I do suggest both. I am not an expert in either, but even I know "sex /pleasure/ is a sin!". Also how many time especially when we were young girls we've heard "cover yourself people will see you" or similar one "cover yourself you are embarrassing me". But why and how my nudity embarrass you? Its mine after all.Â
Studies show that "evolutionary, cultural, and psychological factors" are involved in this. Lets quickly look at the psychological side of it all. Social learning theory (Albert Bandura, 1977) shows that children pick up emotional reaction from their closest to them, therefore if an individual reacts to nakedness with a negative emotion, that emotion will be recorded, remembered (to an extent), iterated and then learned. And then all of this becomes a vicious circle.
Im sorry I digressed.. what I wanted to share is - why whenever we see something that makes us feel uncomfortable (only in the sence of the today's topic) we dont react differently?! Again I am no expert, but wouldn't it be less traumatic if this brave storyteller received from her few family members some kind of appreciation for sharing something so amazing (in her eyes at that moment) and later on was explaned by trusted person what she was actually doing and how this is completely normal.Â
Sometimes our most beloved people are the ones doing the most damage.
