The Fool System

Hello!

I had a system blog before but one of my alters deleted it. We’ll see how long this one lasts.

Name: Mae / the fool system (our alters are very shy and many do not use different names. If they ask to be identified separately, do, but most of us are fine with an over arching name)

Age: 22 (littles do not use our phone, so you can always assume you’re talking to a teenager or an adult)

Pronouns: she/they/he, some alters will specify, but you’re safe with they/them 90% of the time

Other alters that use this blog:

K: blond medium length hair

Blue: blue hair

Mae: red hair (several alters use this name, but they can be distinguished by hairstyle)

Ethan: brownish short hair

Cee Cee: brown long hair

Kay: no set appearance, but tends to use the body’s

Pink: “she” is technically a subsystem of various different alters who all use the name. typically presents with pink or blonde hair

We have an art blog @maetheellen

I will note that our art skill slides a lot, so if you ask for art and it’s not as good as the other things I’ve drawn, that’s why

I’m making this side blog so I can talk about my experiences as a system, and so my less experienced artist alters can draw and post art without embarrassment <3

Feel free to DM. If I don’t respond for a while, it’s because only alters who are comfortable talking respond to my DMs, so I have to wait until one switches in. I’d love more system friends. :,)

Please do not self diagnose based on my posts <3 all of the experiences I share are things that, within reason, could happen to any regular person. Do your research, be smart about it.

Finally, some DNIs and stuff

-overall anti-endo for safety (I have some pro endo, neutral, and anti endo alters, but due to the fact that endo content is extremely triggering for some alters, I do not allow it to show up in front of me) see my post tagged syscourse if you want more information about this <3

-basic DNI

Happy pride!!! Hang all your pride flags and be as gay as possible this month, friends :)

We can create a safe space for each other in this world simply by being visible

a comic about differences in opinion

I love all of you and I hope you’re all well. I promise I don’t hate anyone and I don’t think anyone is ruining their lives. Our brains are traumatized minefields so I understand completely why people are misunderstanding my words— we face so much backlash from others that anything seems like an attack.

I am not attacking you, I am coming from a place of love. The only thing I wanted to say is that, hey people like me who don’t like to identify differently most of the time, that’s real DID and you’re real.

Those of you (some of my alters as well) who identify completely as “separate” alters, I appreciate you as well. The only statement I made is this: you are all parts of the same brain. If you already understand that, then cool, my message wasn’t for you <3 keep on keeping on and being rad.

Viewing my alters as entirely separate people the way DID spaces were saying I should made me feel out of control. It got so bad that at some point my brain just shut out the idea of DID altogether bc it wasn’t safe. I’m at a point where some of my alters are communicating with me safely, and referring to them as just versions of myself instead of separate people has genuinely been such a big help.

When I was deep in online DID spaces, I started to feel like I could never live a normal life. I felt like I wasn’t whole and would never be whole. Now, having adjusted my perspective, I see that all my alters are me. I am whole. I am the only person inhabiting this body, and my states of mind being separated by dissociative barriers doesn’t change that.

It also helped make the concept of the disorder less alien and terrifying to me. It’s not that interesting, it’s just like any other disorder and I can live a comfortable life with it.

Sorry this is long, your comic just helped me realize I wasn’t suppressing myself or being unhealthy for not wanting to act like my alters have different souls. Ftr I am trying to get a diagnosis and more importantly professional help, but it’s a long process.

Almost none— if not none— of my parts have names, favourite colours or personalities that were extremely distinct from mine.

(Another reason is how toxic the online community tends to be towards those with Partial DID, like me, for some reason??)

Like, I have zero concerns with you saying that people language is unhealthy for you. I know many systems for whom parts language is necessary, and that’s totally valid! But for our system, while we’re fully aware that we’re dissociated parts of a whole, our dissociation is less when we refer to ourselves as people sharing a body, because that’s what lets us work best as a team.

I guess my question is - do you want us to stay away since we prefer people language for ourselves, or do you just need us to not push it on you (which we would never do)?

As long as you recognize medically that you are *not* separate people, everything’s cool.

You’re allowed to exist with your DID however you want, as long as you’re being healthy and taking care of yourself.

I think that the online community has a lot to learn, and that it is steeped with unhealthy advice. It’s very easy to become “obsessed” with DID, with alters, etc. But we’re all just traumatized people trying to live and love.

hello! i took a long break from online DID communities because... well because they're fucking awful, lol

i hated myself. i hated what everyone was telling me to be. i had to have names, colors, and personalities. i had to be able to identify when my alters were out. i had to know when I blacked out.

lots of systems, especially older systems, do not use names to differentiate themselves. i read about a middle-aged system named "John" who literally just called himself "angry John" or "sad John" and had for decades before and after diagnosis.

so i crashed out and started ignoring my DID again, but this time with the tools my specialist taught me. I lived my life *with* DID, but I never thought about DID (if that makes sense). I healed a lot from the damage the online community did to me

i am not a separate person from my alters. *you* are not separate people. if the online community is telling you that, you need to get off and speak with a DID professional. you are a single person with many dissociative barriers.

sorry for the downer LOL but i'm back!!! I'll be posting and engaging with my community on my blog, but I won't be engaging with the online DID culture :)