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     Cyrus was the type of girl that held onto things and when i say that i mean dearly hang onto things. In high-school she had met this boy and saw the world in his eyes, as soon as they met it was like electric to her she just knew she could and would love him. For the Sake of identity we will call him “Alo” for in Native American tongue it means “Spirit guide” and that is exactly what he was to her. He guided her to the light in the most graceful of ways. He was beautiful all and all from his Dark brown curly hair to his shy posture that just screamed he had no clue where he was going. That was all okay because she did not as well, but really did? Everything up until that point no longer mattered. For she saw high light and it shone bright at that point he didn’t but she saw deeper and felt deeper than anyone else she had ever become acquainted with. Little did either of them know this is where their lives would truly begin. 

     They met on a cliff high above the waters, grungy and green, but the day was pure, the day was blue. The warm air fell down in rays of heat as summer truly at that moment began. They were both social but in different ways; he was a social drinker and she was a social butterfly. He kept to his own and hung out with his friends as she knew everyone and loved to talk like the flirt she was. They both had deeper demons though through all of the happy talk they had a more saddening walk. Both Cyrus and Alo deeply desired a companion to stand by, they desired to feel love.

I am not perfect, but I am perfect just the way I am.

Some times we need to cry, sometimes we need to scream and sometimes we just need to lay there and adsorb it all.

I am not perfect, but i am perfect just the way I am.

I am fearful. Afraid of heights, fire, cows. being alone, being angry, losing things, and not being right. This is what sets me back. I take out my anger on the ones I love the most because when something doesnt go my way i get upset then  become fearful of myself and take it out on someone. This is what sets me back. 

I am not perfect but I am perfect just the way I am.

I am so shameful of myself for acting this way, I am shameful of isolating myself and thinking that it is everyone elses fault for not hitting me to hang out or asking me if i am okay. I am going through a faze where i think i dont have any friends but that is not true it is only my fault. and that is what sets me back.

I am not perfect but i am perfect just the way i am.

I am afraid to be alone and to lose things. I cling to the things i love way to much some might say i just love too hard. I give what i love my all and trust that it will never hurt me and that makes me a fool because the fact of the matter is not everyone is me as much as i would like to think of it that way some people see things a little different and will take that part of me and run. i trust too much and that is what sets me back. 

I am not perfect but i am perfect just the way i am.

I hold grudges. I start to hate the people that I should not hate. I have a very big problem with resentment and It makes me cold, angry, and sour. and this is what sets me back. 

I am not perfect but i am perfect just the way I am.

but i love. I love the wind, i love the heat of the air when rain hits hot pavement. I love sitting with my friends at a park all day long wasting time, i love to travel, i love to make people feel okay and safe just as I myself want to feel okay and safe. I love the smile on someones face when you make their day its that kind of ear to ear grin that cant be matched any other way. I love the way it feels to lay in the grass and look up at the tree line in the sky. I love flowers and i love to smell nice. I love my clothes and I love my cat. I love the feeling of hugging someone after you are both really excited. I love giving people tarot card readings at festivals. I love waking up at 8 a.m. every morning just because i can and still feeling okay to go on with my day. I love doing yoga outside then laying there at the end. I love taking pictures of bugs i find even though i would never touch them. and I love making art.

I am not perfect but i am perfect just the way i am.

but i create. I am very creative, i create channeled art and that gives me passion of day, i create love so others may heal and so that it may heal me as well, i create beauty as i know i give it off, i create energy which i so lovingly project. 

I am not perfect but i am perfect just the way i am.

I am talented, i am beautiful i am strong i am forgiving, i try to be understanding, i love maybe a little too much, i feel, i care, I am.

these are all things that put me forward 

I am not perfect but i am perfect just the way i am

The things i am shameful for are the things that put me forward the things that i change, manipulate, or realize are all things that set me forward. I should not be getting angry over petty things i need to let go, why do i continue to hold onto such intense pain inside of me? why do i hold grudges and create resentment that hurts others. I am afraid. I am afraid that if i let go i will lose and i dont want to lose i just want to love thats all i have ever wanted. I need to get over myself because these are not the things that set me back i am the thing that sets me back. i am what causes me pain so why dont i remember that? why do i have to keep reminding myself of that? it is so hard to let go but letting go isnt losing it is just feeling love over pain. I am afraid that if i let go i will not feel anything. i can let go of everything else so why not let go of this? this is not what sets me back for this is what sets me forward