The Papa Bear of Men's Fashion

When they start playing live music and you break out into your favorite dance… the Weeble Wobble (we don’t fall down). It’s like breakdancing without the fun.

Ok fine, on a boat you may remove your jacket… if it’s before 6 o’clock… and I’m not looking

Always remember, you aren’t fully dressed on the 4th of July until someone asks you to tone down your outfit as it’s distracting them from the fireworks

Waiting for your yacht to come in when you realize… you don’t have a yacht… yet somehow your yacht has a dress code at the same time

”Yes! I knew you’d get it!”

”Sorry crossing my legs has been declared a weapon of mass destruction by the UN. with that potential energy if my leg slips, it could destroy us all”

”Well here’s the thing, 1. they’re already judging you and 2. So what?”

”How dare you! These are clearly Rope stripes!”

”First how can anyone take that poorly? And second, it’s the shaking bowl full of jelly giving me away isn’t it?”

Here we have a bigus sartorialis scuttling from shaded area to shaded area in a vain attempt to prevent the loss of his winter waistcoat and hat

When you keep hearing the ghostly chilling words “It’s so very hot, loosen your tie”. Not today SATIN!! Not today

When you’re on a panel at a conference and your co-presenters all buy (joke) bowler hats to match you

Now is the summer of our discontent… made waistcoatless and hatless by this sun (of a B)

“Thank God we don’t have to wear suits anymore for work. Everyone looked the same!” Said the men all wearing chinos and blue or white shirts to work

The 19th century railroad baron tentatively stepped out of the Time Machine… and took one look at the current trains and clothes and said “I’m out”

When your only super power is being a walking wall of worsted wool

One day I’ll have a head injury and wake up speaking with a British accent. Of course it will probably be a form of Cockney that Adele couldn’t understand”