When I met you in May, the air was fresh and full of hope.
Slowly, the spring left our little city and the summer came on its place.
We were outside together till the night skies turned blue again.
We laid on the soft, green grass which was like a beautiful summer bed.
With you, these moments felt like forever and it was like the war stopped for a second just to let us sit here and enjoy looking up to the stars.
In July, they started to destroy all the hope I tried to collect over months I had to stay here, here in Srebrenica.
They wanted to show us that there is no chance of surviving anymore.
The βsafe zoneβ the UN founded became to a zone of terror and death.
Instead of helping us out of this hell, the βPeacemakersβ just sat there and watched the Serbs who didnβt let food and drink pass to us.
My stomach was empty for days and the only chance to drink water was to steal something or to drink the dirty rain water, which was on the ground.
But you and I, we swore to stay together forever and we both saved each other from starving.
I was so happy that you were with me in these days of horror.
The nights we laid on the fresh grass turned into dark nights of fright and panic.
Gunfire, screaming people and stories of murdering men and raping women made it impossible for us to find some sleep.
The next day, we couldnβt stand the situation anymore and decided to flee to a village near to Srebrenica.
There we hoped to be safe from the Serbian army.
But we were too naΓ―ve.
Just 24 hours later they arrived and besieged the empty school where we hided.
In the night they picked people from the crowd and killed them.
One time, when they killed a young man just in front of us, you put your arms around me and pushed my head against your breast, so I didnβt had to watch to this nightmare. Nevertheless, to hear the shooting and the screaming, aghast people around was terrible enough and made me sick.
In the morning, something horrible happened. Loads of Serbian soldiers came and forced us to separate into two groups: the women, children and olds and the men.
Some people went to their group directly, some refused to. People who protested were killed directly. You held me in your arms, whispering in my ear that youβll never let me go. You promised.
Then, they saw us. In their faces I couldnβt see any emotions, just the cold hate which made them to monsters.
They screamed to go to our group but we still stood together. Now they got angry and tried to separate us cruelty. They pulled us away from each other and pressed my hands on my back so hard that my eyes filled with tears and I thought my arms would break.
I screamed your name and tried everything to come free but I was too weak. I looked into your eyes.
You were strong the whole time. You saw people starving, committing suicide and being shot and you stayed strong. But now, in this moment you knew that you couldnβt be saved anymore and you couldnβt hold your tears back.
The last time I saw you, you tried to smile.
Our group, the women and children, was brought to Kladanj into another save zone.
The 11th of June 1995 was the last day Iβve seen you. In front of an old school in Potocari.
For a long time I didnβt knew what happened to you, until they found the mass graves.
Scientists discovered your DNA on the clothes of one of the 8372 victims.
We swore to stay together forever and I still try not to break our promise.
I came back to Srebrenica, the city where the nightmare began.
Every day I visit you on the cemetery of Srebrenica. And I stay till the skies turn blue.
I still feel your deep hugs and your warm breath when you whispered in my ear that everything will be okay.
But nothing is. You are dead and I am crying every day, just like thousands of other people who lost their sons, fathers, husbands, relatives or friends in Srebrenica.
blakekathryn
prguitarman
gummygunk
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
snowghoul
gamechangershow
