Silver sat on the edge of the fountain for a long time, simply… thinking. So much had happened recently… at least compared to how it had been, floating out in the Abyss.
Derek. Avery. The King. Moea. Ria. Another Derek. Another King. Another Avery. Another King and Avery and Derek.
And then, the cult.
Silver didn’t want to remember.
She didn’t want to feel the blood put against her cheek.
She didn’t want to see the look of confusion when she rejected it.
She didn’t want to see the poor people, scammed again and again, abused and lied to.
She didn’t want to be revered.
The first tear fell on the map, at the same spot the fountain rested.
Silver missed Moea.
The next hit her leg. They barely noticed.
Silver missed her friends.
They folded the map. Their hands shook.
Silver missed not being a monster.
Their legs shook as they stood. The map fell from their hands.
Silver ran.
And ran.
And ran.
Until she was far away from the Haven.
Until she couldn’t run anymore.
Until no one could hear her, as it should’ve been the entire time.
And Silver…
S C R E A M E D.
Saturn, currently in the haven and looking around to see the type of place it was, heard a loud scream suddenly. "What.."
She began walking over carefully towards the source of the sound, checking to see who it was.
"Oh that's Silver.." She muttered to herself once the silhouette of the person was revealed.
Saturn slowly approached Silver, having picked up the map on the way. "Hey, you good?"
Silver’s first instinct was to run, to leave, to not let them see her pain.
Lips trembling, she doesn’t answer Saturn, simply staring with glowing, mint-green eyes.
A breakdown or a panic attack, whatever truly caused that scream hadn’t fully passed, and Silver had always been too concerned about others to accept care for herself.
Saturn watched Silver run again. "Oh dear.."
"Running will make it difficult you know" She said again, just maintaining a proper pace to be close to Silver without actually running as well.
"You will get hurt this way, sweetie"
Silver does trip after a little bit, but over what, she couldn’t tell. She lets herself fall to her knees, the tears still flowing.
“… I don’t want to hurt you too…”
Saturn crouched down in front of Silver, checking to see if they got hurt by the ordeal. She put her hand on Silver's head, softly ruffling their hair. "You won't hurt me, honey, it's okay"
“But you-” Silver tried to take a breath, but it comes out stuttering, her nose blocked. “You don’t know that… you don’t know me….”
"I know you, Silver. And I know you know who I am too" Saturn kept patting the girl to try and calm her down.
Silver leaned into the touch, just barely. “Barely,” she whispered. “I know you know Ria….”
"Okay good. Are you okay honey? Do you want to talk a bit?" Saturn smiled when Silver leaned into the touch.
“I…” Silver’s voice cracked harshly, so they simply shook their head. “I… don’t know how…”
"Okay, that's okay. Do you atleast know why you were running like this?"
They shook their head again.
Silver’s lips felt glued shut, their throat tight. Tears still fell everywhere few seconds, despite her attempts to stop them.
Saturn sighed and gently hugged Silver. "It's okay, it's alright. I'm right here"
Silver—for once—allowed herself to be cared for. She melted into the hug, holding onto Saturn as if she was the last thing keeping them from slipping back into panic.
And the tears came again, strong but… releasing something Silver never knew they were holding.
Saturn rubbed her back to soothe the panic. "Good job, cry like this, you're doing great"
Silver could barely hear Saturn over the ringing slowly drowning everything out.
Someone held her like this once. They hurt her and hurt her and hurt her and yet they loved her so so much and only wanted what’s best for their child-
But it hurt. And she just wanted it all to stop.
A memory, at a time like this…. Silver tried to block it out, tried not to think of Before, of the pain. But the tears kept coming, and so did the memories.
They couldn’t help but cling.
Saturn could tell what was happening as she finally cooperated with her.
"That's it, let it all out" Saturn couldn't help but feel this is similar to Ria's past.
“It hurts-” Silver choked on a sob. “To remember- I don’t know why-”
"Traumatic memories hurt sometimes" Saturn opened her bag and handed Silver a bottle of water.
Silver didn’t drink any of the water right away, first attempting to dry her eyes a little bit. They stung, although that might’ve partially been due to the fact that her eyes were nearly always dry.
“They’re not even mine anymore….” She swallowed thickly before finally opening the cap of the bottle. She barely took a sip before closing it again.
"Maybe not, but they still feel real to you, don't they?" Saturn patted her head again. "Drink some more, don't dehydrate yourself"
Silver didn’t have an answer to that. She was never sure what felt real to her anymore.
“‘M fine,” she said instead. “I don’t need as much as most people do.”
Saturn shrugged. "I guess that's true" She put the bottle back in its place.
