Drawer Of Many Things

emperor bing-ge is getting exhausted by the size of the harem/tired of picking up new wives and even grumpier after visiting the bing-mei universe so he tells his advisors to yeet anyone from the harem that won't cause a huge uproar (cos he knows like a solid third are probably cool leaving) and to make sure they get paid and are taken care of but that he never has to deal with them again

ning yingying is pissed he did this without even talking to the wives, but bing-ge is sulking so he's being super mature and not at all acting like an adult who has a terrible childhood and has regressed out of trauma and she's like you divorced a-yuan???? we LOVE her what is wrong with you (cos SY transmigrated as a wife, who I'm giving shapeshifting abilities to because he can have less gender dysphoria as a treat)

and bing-ge is like no i didn't--I like that one! thats the one in my rotation for the resting day cos she likes hearing all my cool fighting stories and we never end up banging (SY made his appearance a little less femme in hopes of evading Bing-ge's interests but is always a little disappointed for some reason that it never actually ends in papapa)

and ning yingying just gives him this look (she is mad cos A-Yuan helped her organize logistic shit in the harem and liked learning QJP cultivation shit as her his reward which NYY missed doing and finds teaching really nice! LMY is also mad her bookclub got culled a member or two, possibly SHL found a partner to bitch about other harem ladies with) and he's like WHAT? I looked at the list! and A-Yuan was definitely not on it.

and NYY is like, you idiot -- if you'd MET your wives in person and talked to them to divorce them rather than letting a PROXY do it you'd know that A-Yuan's actual name was SOMENAME

and bing-ge is not going to freak out over this, because it's no big deal, he made sure his advisors gave money and housing/land fairly and settled the ex-wives so it should be easy enough to track A-Yuan down, except SY didn't take any of that and only left a note that said he hoped Binghe would be happy and that the culling the harem meant he'd finally found what he was looking for which of course never got delivered because idk the little palace mistress or something

so bing-ge is upset and complaining because the wife he liked to hang out with and spend time with and listened to him and sometimes brushed his hair and actually cared about his personal happiness was gone and NYY, LMY, and SHL are just sorta looking at him like god, I married this fucking moron didn't I? and eventually he gets the hint and is like fine I'll just find via my blood

except he never gave A-Yuan his blood, because he usually does that after they consummate on their wedding night, and they hadn't done that -- so he's like god I'm so stupid (SHL/NYY: That's what I've been saying! LMY: *nodding*)

so basically, SY transmigrated into one of the many wives, who is idk a fox spirit or something with shape shifting who noticed that Binghe was really tired on their wedding night and was like um, do you want to just like sleep or something? and they talked for a while about all the cool shit Binghe has done and some monsters and Binghe actually slept for once and felt great in the morning and forgot and this occurred every other time he had A-Yuan on his rotation so it just sorta became his rest day and Shen Yuan was disappointed even though he was ignoring that, but also not because he got to hang out with Binghe!

and when the divorces happen he's like oh okay, well he must have finally figured out LMY should be empress and/or Airplane wrote his one-true-love, hopefully she's cool! and he tries to at least say goodbye, but the entire thing is an impersonal shove out the palace walls and he doesn't really want the money or the land offered and his character doesn't have family left so he is like welp all right and just shapeshifts completely to a dude instead of playing with gender (andmaybesometimes mixes it up) -- and starts wandering around looking at cool plants and beasts and shit with literally no idea the emperor is having a meltdown over him

Despite his miffs about the whole thing, as an antifan Shen Yuan still applies for the lucky draw (on several different accounts because he’ll be damned if there’s a piece of PIDW merch he doesn’t have) and ends up winning on his main account.

“Congratulations to @ PeerlessCucumber for winning the lucky draw! Please DM me with your email and any shipping information.”

Comes from the official Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky account, followed up by a mocking post because the infamous Peerless Cucumber applied for the giveaway?! What a joke lolll

Anyways he gives Airplane his info and stuff and the dolls get shipped. Everything is fine and dandy, right?

Totally normal.

…

Something strange has been happening in Cang Qiong mountain sect.

People were having strange dreams. It was brought into light when Qi Qingqi reported to Mu Qingfang for a recurring dream. In the dream she was in a world where her surroundings were giant and unfamiliar.

It was nothing crazy. She’d just been having them for a while and wasn’t sure why.

Almost immediately Mu Qingfang called for a peak lord meeting, explaining nothing until he was surrounded by his martial siblings.

“Has anyone else been having a recurring dream where you’re in an unfamiliar place with abnormally large surroundings?”

Mu Qingfang asked, his eyebrows shooting up when the expressions of everyone present shifted a bit, hardening into something more serious.

Luo Binghe didn't expect to see his Shizun on this mission. He isn't ready yet, he isn't enough yet- but he cannot let this opportunity slip by. Cannot let Shizun think that he is content with the polite distance they had affected when surrounded by Huan Hua disciples.

He's definitely read and hasn't been standing outside Shizun's door for a few minutes now, gathering the strength to face Shizun. He's spent the hours since they met planning what he was going to say, every possible reaction Shizun could have. He can do this. Luo Binghe can fix whatever mistake he made and Shizun will love him again.

But Shizun doesn't answer when he knocks. He can hear Shizun shuffling in the room, the sound of fabric shifting. Shizun doesn't answer or open the door when Luo Binghe knocks again.

Surely Shizun isn't ignoring him. He wouldn't do that. Even if Shizun hated him he wouldn't ignore him. He can't. Luo Binghe won't let him. He cannot fix this if Shizun ignores him. He just needs to talk to him, to see him, to get past this door.

Luo Binghe doesn't even have to break the lock, the door opens with no resistance, and well, better to ask for forgiveness instead of permi-

Luo Binghe has just intruded into a nesting omega's space. Shizun is nesting and Luo Binghe has just waltzed in like he has any right to be here, with Shizun at his most vulnerable- (but he wants it, with every fiber of his being. He wants to be in Shizun's nest, where only close family and friends are invited. He wants he wants he wants)

Luo Binghe needs to leave, he needs to retreat and regather his thoughts. He needs new plans, he cannot mess this up. None of his plans accounted for Shizun going into heat. Omegas are mostly instinct and pheromones during their heat- Shizun isn't going to be swayed by logical arguments or lofty acheivements. Shizun is only going to see the demon that is Luo Binghe. And who would want a demon in their nest?

Shizun has noticed him. Luo Binghe wasted too much time panicking like some sort of simple-minded fool. He braces himself for rejection, again.

But it isn't "stay back" or "danger" or any other threat or warning pheromone that reaches him. Luo Binghe is hit with a litany of "my child baby come here my beloved mine come to me" with Shizun's open arms beckoning.

No one else is here.

Shizun wants him.

Shizun wants Luo Binghe.

Luo Binghe throws himself to the floor and crawls to Shizun, the iron clad control he'd spent years painstakingly building - crumbles under Shizun's gentle hands. Luo Binghe can't stop the tears or the reveal of his demonic traits the way he can't stop loving Shizun.

Shizun kisses him on the forehead, and scents him. Rubs his face and neck over Luo Binghe's. "My pack, my family, my child," the scent says. Shizun still smells the same under the pheromones. Like lavender oil, ink, and bamboo. He still uses the same soaps and oils Binghe had selected for him as a disciple. He smells like home.

Shizun purrs and pets his hair, and his scent says "I am here, all is well."

Anyway from SQQ's POV it's like this:

Except, y'know. Shen Qingqiu has no idea how to swaddle an infant. Or an adult.

What he did is he stood LBH up and wrapped two blankets around him burrito style. That bitch is now tucked the fuck in. SQQ is Winning in Omega. Which is both possible to achieve and normal to want.

"I was really hoping to see you again before I left," he said, starting to rifle through his backpack. "but even if you don't want to see me, I've brought you a gift."

fanart of shen yuan's plastic guanyin keychain from @nyoomerr's fic, you don't need poltergeists for sidekicks :D

++ sulky bingge for the soul :3c

may I know your top 5 favorite luo bingge HCs, if you have?

also do you ship bingjiu?

no pressure ask btw <3

Thank you thank you! The spectre of bing-ge haunts me just as he haunts the rest of SVSSS and I am delighted by the opportunity to ramble more about my favourite horrid little guy

Top 5 Luo Bing-ge Headcanons as per me:

He is the massive, number 1 simp lord for Shen Qingqiu (Shen Yuan edition) since the day they met, an even bigger simp than Bing-mei if you can believe it. Part of this stems from the fact he does genuinely love SQQ (unlike his poor wives F in the chat), but another part stems from a deep desperation to be capable of love, and the lingering sense that there is something wrong with him, there's always been something wrong with him, some undefinable thing that he can't see but everyone else around him always has. That's why everyone's always hated him, surely. That's why he was reviled on Cang Qiong since the day he arrived, some intangible wrongness no matter how he tries to set it right, something everyone else can see somehow but he can't. He doesn't understand what's so wrong with him, but with Shen Yuan, not only does Shen Qingqiu/Yuan love him (huge news, that would be enough for him to obsess), but Luo Binghe is capable of loving in turn, and he didn't think he ever would be, and he is desperate to cling onto it with both hands

That said, he's also a huge dick the whole time. Controlling, domineering, struggles with empathy, and overall behaves like a red flag boyfriend in new and exciting ways. No one's ever given a damn about Bing-ge's feelings, so why should other people's feelings matter to him?

He's lacking in several foundational basics of education and he is extremely hostile to the mere mention of it. This is not a man who can stand to feel small, or diminished, or less-than in any capacity, to a far more severe degree than Bing-mei. For example, Bing-ge's calligraphy is... not bad, because he's still Luo Binghe, but it's notably less elegant and refined than Bing-mei's. However, the mere implication of criticism may send Bing-ge into a rage (he is very self-conscious and deeply wounded at the fact no one taught him. His ego also can't cope with feedback now)

He sits at both ends of any given extreme, whatever those are. For example, he is a very controlling man - but also thinks of himself as obliging and obedient and will completely roll over and do whatever Shen Qingqiu/Yuan wants under the right circumstances. Bing-ge is ruthless and authoritarian, but also manages to have zero self-respect or even the semblance of a spine when it comes to Shen Qingqiu/Yuan. Duality of man.

I do not personally ship BingJiu, however -- the fact that Bing-ge is suddenly on board with getting with the teacher who ruined his life after a handful of pleasant interactions... I think about that a lot. To that end, it's my headcanon that while Bing-ge would never have fallen in love with Shen Jiu, their relationship is a source of great and confused resentment for him for more reasons than the obvious. It remains unclear to Bing-ge exactly what percentage of his revenge on Shen Jiu was motivated by payback for Shen Jiu's abuse, general daddy/teacher issues, or a psychosexual fixation Bing-ge's never figured out but which has amped all their interactions to the maximum. Luo Binghe, to his great confusion, has always been a bit obsessed with Shen Qingqiu - there's always been an edge to that relationship entirely beyond any of his other revenge schemes. He's always found Shen Qingqiu attractive on some level - which unfortunately made the hatred between them even more explosive when it ruptured.

I had to…. It’s so they…

[ID: Scum Villain sketch. Luo Binghe leans toward Shen Qingqiu and smirks, saying, "can i try rizzing you up." Shen Qingqiu smiles from behind his fan and says "sure. LOL." Luo Binghe then drops to his knees and clutches at Shen Qingqiu's robes, tears and snot running down his face. He begs, "please please please" repeatedly.

The original meme is a text conversation with the same words, the "please" message being in all caps and extending past the bottom of the screenshot. /end ID]

Original meme under cut

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIMOTHY JACKSON DRAKE!! ANOTHER YEAR OF BEING 17 WHOOP WHOOP!

I’ve only known he existed for a little over a year but Tim Drake as a character very literally changed my life.

Binghehe.

That’s it.

But for a few years (cough, decades, cough), a baby pebble is about as hard as a soft-shelled turtle—or a normal turtle, if they're a bit older. Disadvantages aside, there is an advantage to being able to see your offspring's internal functions. And until their vocal bladders form and they're capable of making multiple complex sounds, being able to see what is hurting is absolutely helpful.

It's a universal experience among parents to lament the day they can no longer hear their pebbles' heartbeats.

That is to say, Rocky knows Grace is an adult, okay? He isn't someone who anthropomorphizes, and he isn't going to start now. Statement.

But when he first heard Grace in all his squishy glory— heart pumping away, lungs filling and deflating, organs digesting food— his brain went full baby-fever mode. Frankly, he was white-knuckling the urge to find the nearest hypothetical cave, bundle him up into a proper nest, and wait for his skin to absorb the surrounding minerals and start hardening properly.

But because Rocky is sensible and proper and not going to infantilize his best friend (he swears to God, stupid fucking instincts, shut the fuck up!!), he won't.

But sometimes the urge to squish his best friend is overwhelming. He just pinches at him through the permeable mesh of his ball. And Grace will screw up his face (so soft) and go what’s up bud? I piss you off or something? (He learns what bruises are and sulks for half a day afterward.)

All of that aside, once again, Rocky has gotten used to Grace's heartbeat, his clumsiness, and his one-tone voice. That's his best friend, and he's smart and just as capable as any other adult. He is also the cutest fucking thing to Eridian hearing. Is he also disconcertingly alien, definitely— His size, the limbs, the head protrusion (and other protrusions), the leakiness detracted maybe. But his cluster-sibling once cooed at and brought home a pet sulphur slug because, oh my spirits, hear his squishy respiratory system and you tell me that's not the cutest thing on the planet! It blurbles, Rocky! It fucking blurbles!

So, as Erid draws closer and Rocky/Grace become more excited and stressed. (The food has yet to run out, and as good as Erid is, they need substantial help from the human side to figure out how to make proper human nutrition. And finding the right informational packs in all of human knowledge is a very big undertaking.)

binghe's content does a complete 180 after that, moving from michelin-level recipes to 'cooking on a budget' and 'time-friendly' meals. peerlesscucumber occasionally will send another picture of his poor, neglected fridge and ask for suggestions. luo binghe always fulfills his requests!