alt er love

going chronologically was of course the right choice for the show but man i love the prologue in heated rivalry so bad. boston montreal game. these two guys are trying to kill each other on the ice. the audience is frothing at the mouth. the montreal metros lose the game and they are coming up with ways to kill rozanov if the purge ever happens. and then when shane gets home there's a knock on the door and he's opening it with a "what took you so long". remember the two guys who were just trying to kill each other? Surprise! they are having incredibly tender sex. shane's inner monologue the whole time is "i am a bad seed on this earth (for wanting to fuck men). everything i want (fucking men) is horrible and fucked up. i am evil. i am evil. i am evil but i will find a wife. yes btw this has been going on for seven years and he has ruined me for anyone else. but i am NOT in LOVE."

hollanov long distance era where ilya sometimes texts shane about the random things he finds during the day that’s shaped like a heart. heart shaped rock, heart shaped leaf, heart shaped clouds etc etc and says “for u my love” and shane spends and embarrassing amount of time staring at the heart shaped pillar detail and ilya’s “thinking of u” text because he thinks of ilya all the time too but he couldn’t imagine putting it into texts as accurately as ilya would. so shane goes on adventures to find heart shaped things too, and they send it back and forth to each other like secret messages, and they never have to delete them

When Shane gets traded to Ottawa, Harris posts a pic of itty bitty toddler Shane in an Ottawa Centaurs jersey that he is absolutely drowning in (it‘s David‘s) cheesing like there is no tomorrow, next to a pic of current Shane in his new Centaurs jersey with the caption: welcome home, Shane.

the two most talked about prospects in the world: canada’s hudson williams and america’s connor storrie

shane hollander doing a bunch of anti smoking billboards for city of montreal that ilya loves to send a photo of himself in front of with a lit cigarette between his lips every time hes in town

ugh its just that when ilya asks "do they know?" shane's first thought is do they know about you? because he can't fathom any version of him being gay, interested in someone, etc, that's not linked to how he feels about ilya ughhh. he can't imagine ilya not being part of that picture bc he's so deeply tied to how shane experiences desire and queerness ughhhh they make me feel crazy