courage isn't what you think it is
TLDR ; courage is doing something even when you're scared :)
i admit most of the time I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. tbh i don't any of us do or people hide it quite well
whether you're trying to exist as yourself, doing what you love, saying no/yes to people it will ALWAYS feel overwhelming at first. courage isn't having enough plans, skills or self improvement. You will never feel ready to be yourself or make life changes because changing yourself or your life takes getting familiar with something unknown. unknown is what causes the fear. don't wait until you shut down and want to quit life
when i was in highschool, i could only talk to my teachers and draw to not talk to people. i'd be safe from getting close to anyone. however, i felt incredibly lonely and hopeless. it's only when i push myself to try talking to people as a cashier (screw retail ugh) i got used to talking to people. over the years, i got good at it. i still get flustered, but i can talk to anyone.
same goes for trying again. many people have hurt me. i could choosen to close my heart and be a chameleon, but i try again because i'd make better decision going into each new situation
it's ok to not know what you're doing, to feel overwhelmed, messy, intimidated, frustrated and want to quit. you're gonna make a lot of mistakes in life and that's ok. what matters is
even if is fucking terrifying. you're just doing the best you can. i call it "growing pains" like when your ribs hurts when you breath ew. eventually, it goes away. you gain evidence you can do stuff and doing new stuff gets easier and life feels less suffocating. what if all the unknowns of life weren't dark because you tried it all parts?
areudirty
vaporwave
snowghoul
andulkaphoto
annaxmalina
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