james taylor moore.

“No shit? Well, I’m sure that’ll be a joy for everyone here. Thanks…For the warning. Are you doing okay?”

Stepping closer, James placed a hand on Michael’s waist and another on the opposite wrist. “I’m alright, my focus is you. You know I’ll do what I can, the warning is perks of moving in with Academy staff. How are you feeling, tough guy?”

Before I begin, I want to make it known that this is OPTIONAL. You’re free to do any of these optional challenges at any time. It doesn’t matter how long ago I posted the challenge prompt, go ahead and check the tag on this blog and do any of them at any time. Post your participation to social media and tag them tga:development and @tgaimportant​ to claim ONE PARTICIPATION POINT per participation post. Don’t be afraid to talk to each other about your answers, that’s the whole point. If you’re shy, you can use the anon ask feature. People that I see talking to other people about their answers will also get ONE PARTICIPATION POINT.

This task is inspired by the personality quizzes that people post on Facebook and Tumblr and they work the same way; you will take the quiz and post your result on social media. Each time I bring personality quizzes into these challenges, I’ll give you one specific personality quiz to take. You can take the quiz as many times as you want, we’re all complex people and sometimes the answers on these things are close calls, and it’s interesting to see how the different options that you like change your outcome. And let’s face the facts, some of us are too complex to be like just one fictional character.

The specific prompt for the specific personality quiz that’s going around for this challenge is:

WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER ARE YOU MOST LIKE?

I believe that if our assumptions were right about the marks being based on our biological needs and the environment around us, then that must be what this is about as well. With the new laws came change, and people are capable of more now. So it only makes sense that it would be reflected in our marks as well. It’s never been a shame or strange thing to stray from your mark; I’ve seen Submissives dominate and I’ve seen Dominants submit, so it’s not like it’s a new concept to be interested in both. Now both are capable on a wide scale, evolution knew that we needed that reflected.

Stop thinking with their hormones, reproductive organs, and egos and start acting like decent human beings to each other more often. The amount of snarky ass replies I see to people for no reason at all baffles me every day.

A lot of the resources that I've reblogged can be used as non-sexual reference. Specifically, since I do love knowledge but I don't feel like looking through everything I've got up because it's a lot, I'll just make a nice list for you:

bondage, impact play, pet play, sensory dep, pain play and a variety of other kinks can be explored non-sexually; some asexual individuals find pain play, sensory play/dep, and bondage to be relaxing

chores, any kind of cleaning, cleaning, or assistance in daily life like helping dress a Dominant; can also include massages

assign a daily act of kindness for others, where your submissive does something for someone else and then tells you about it and includes you; like having you oversee them cooking a meal for someone else

submissive/slave training; this can be done naked or clothed and can be anything from teaching positions and commands to refining skills; this can include examinations too, like checking to be sure body hair is to the Dominant's desires

protocol uses that call that training into action, like being used as human furniture or performing tasks

scheduled care scenes, like the Dominant bathing the Submissive and dressing them, this can include feeding too

put a skill to use, like art, writing, reading, dance, or music

make your Submissive be the art piece, paint on them with body paints

scavenger hunts and other interactive activities and games or puzzles; this can be playing a game that was bought or make use of memory clues like favorite items to be sure partners remember information about each other

Here are some articles too, because I couldn't help myself:

https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/193843-non-sexual-bdsm/

https://www.kinkweekly.com/article-jenn/non-sexual-play/

https://beyondtherainbowblog.wordpress.com/2015/01/03/non-sexual-bdsm/

http://msmorganthorne.com/bdsm-without-s-e-x-exploring-non-sexual-kink-relationships/

https://sunnymegatron.com/bdsm-without-sex/

And for specific orders: https://www.kinkly.com/6-orders-for-a-submissive-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-sex/2/15722

Okay, it’s time for another BDSM tea time with your favorite tutor. I’ve already gotten things started with this explanation that details all the finer things about how our biological needs affect us from biological needs, withdrawals, to aftercare and Sub/Dom Drop. I already have more BDSM information up too, you can browse a library of useful little tidbits on my page with the tag tga:tutor and content: bdsm 101

You’re a little kinky, but you’re not sure what part of BDSM is right for you. The good news is that BDSM is more than just the four letters its acronym stands for:

bondage and discipline

dominance and submission

and sadism and masochism.

BDSM is all about pushing boundaries and exploring new territories with a sex partner, and most importantly, BDSM depends on the enthusiastic consent of both people involved, and requires a lot of respect and open communication to work well.

BDSM contains a wide range of different sexual activities, including role-play, bondage, and domination and submission. If you’re ready to explore and you think your partner might be, too boo, it’s time to start talking about it.

CONSENT, CONSENT, CONSENT!

So what’s step one, you ask? Well, consent is the first key landmark to hit if you’re looking to get your BDSM on. Before you begin to have the conversation, you’ve got to make sure that your partner(s) is consenting to having it.

It’s important to remember that consent can be taken away at any time, for anything at all, even if it was previously consented to, especially during BDSM play. Just because you’re both kinky honey or you’ve tried something before doesn’t mean you’ll always be into it. You and your partner should make sure you have clear, ongoing communication about your boundaries, your likes and dislikes, and any limits you have. And know that the items on these lists can change at any time, so it’s important to be consistently checking in.

That being said, there is a list of people that have already laid out blanket consent statements HERE for your use. Whether you want to use it to find someone to scene with or to have your name added to it.

SO YOU WANT TO START THE CONVERSATION?

If you’re thinking about exploring the many options within BDSM— whether you want to buy a pair of handcuffs to tie your partner up, or practice with a whip and chains— the first thing you need to do is open the conversation with your partner(s).

Ask your partner(s) how much they know about BDSM as a whole. Most people speak in only simple D/s terms in this world because that is the most obvious part of this term, but there is so much more to it. Even those that believe themselves to be advanced, even professional Dominants, Switches, and Submissives that offer their D/s services for pay, could stand to learn a little more. There isn’t enough time in one life to know every single thing there is to know about BDSM.

Decide what it is that you’re looking to get out of this experience. Is it a one time scene? Is it part of a bigger relationship? Are you exploring yourself? Learning new things? Are you more interested in the potentially non sexual aspects of Bondage And Disciplines? Are you looking to sate your D/s needs? Do you prefer or need something harsher- something like sadism and masochism? If this is your first time getting even a little kinky, it might be helpful for each of you to write down a list of kinky situations you’re interested in trying, along with a second list of your hard boundaries. If you’re into trying anal but you absolutely do not want nipple clamps, your partner needs to know that, and vice versa. Emotions and exclusivity is part of this conversation too. It is important to be on the same page there, because in this world it isn’t out of place for someone to assume that their relationship is open or free for poly influences. People dip into BDSM with multiple people all of the time and it is ABSOLUTELY NOT something that requires you to be in a committed relationship.

While you’re having this discussion, it’s important to come up with one or more safe words with your partner. First, decide on a word that will serve as an absolute stop during sexual activity. Think of this safe word like an off button; if you or your partner uses it, even within the realm of role play, domination, or other kinky sex situations, then you’ll both stop immediately and reassess the situation to make sure everyone’s comfortable. Safe words particularly come in handy if you’re role playing or practicing sadism, masochism, dominance or submission, but they can be used any time that someone is even slightly uncomfortable or wants to take a pause. Safe words are often used in lieu of partners simply saying “No” or “Stop,” because those words might be a part of the role play, especially if you’re practicing extremely rough sex. For those that want to check on their partners during play, “stoplight safewords” can be used as well. Red, yellow, and green to indicate how comfortable a person is and not only can the Submissive in the situation use them, the Dominant can order/ask the Submissive to tell them where they are so that they can both keep an eye on comfort levels.

AFTERCARE IS IMPORTANT. PERIOD.

I already told you in my last post, it’s also important to meet your and your partner’s emotional needs before and after BDSM sex acts, particularly if they’re rough or involve any role playing such as dominance and submission, or sadism and masochism. Imagine being whipped like Jesus on a St. Andrew’s cross and then left to bleed dry on your own? No. Even the smallest scene could end up feeling that intense if you don’t bother with aftercare. A human mind is a shady place, and you can talk yourself into a whole mess if you let it get there. It might help if you have a soothing conversation after a rough scene, but talk about it with your partner to see what makes sense for both of you. BDSM can be an exciting, kinky addition to your sex life—but maintaining active, enthusiastic consent and communication is key, honey.

KEEP THE CONVERSATION GOING.

You should know by now, this whole scene is a constantly revolving door. You can hop off and leave whenever you want, but if you’re staying on for the ride you’re going to need to keep with the pattern the door swings on; communication, scene, aftercare, communication, scene, aftercare. When you’re first trying BDSM and kinky sex acts with a new partner(s), you should check in with them regularly to make sure you’re both enjoying yourselves sexually and emotionally, that you feel safe and comfortable, and that you both want to move forward. Have a nonjudgmental conversation about what’s working for both of you, what isn’t, and what you might want to try in the future. You can’t get what you want and need if you don’t speak up. The best way to maintain enthusiastic consent is to do these regular check-ins, especially when BDSM is new to you, you’re trying a new type of BDSM act, or you’re with a new partner, to make sure everyone’s on the same page. This isn’t exclusive to the sex acts either, this goes for non sexual BDSM too.

Got questions? I know. It’s a lot to process. But you can always reply to these information posts of mine with questions, DM, or @ me, I am more than well equipped to help me field these questions if you want to chat it up. My inbox is always open.

Of course. I live to serve. What's up, Jeff?

D/S NEEDS, WITHDRAWALS, AND SUB/DOM DROP.

Let’s talk biology, folkx. Mark Leaders are beginning, or Mark Support Group Captains, and that seems like the perfect time to start posting helpful tips again. Remember, anyone can become a Mark Leader. All you need is a willingness to help and be the bridge to the information and assistance that your peers require. Everyone knows that we have basic needs that fuel the desire to live life in a way that aligns with our marks. That’s what they were made for, and despite the turmoil that they have caused they have also helped the general population live their life in harmony, with their biological needs fulfilled. Have you ever suppressed your desires and gone weeks without submitting or dominating? Or felt yourself relax after a scene with proper aftercare? Then you know what I mean. We all should. We might not all agree with or understand our marks, but they’re here for a reason and have meaning.

Some people choose to do little things every day to satisfy their needs without committing to full scenes; you can get a little bit out of anything that gives you a nice power/submission rush, be is using titles to address Switches and Doms, being addressed by title, leading clubs or other activities, volunteering to help out in vanilla activities, kneeling, or even just sitting down to talk to someone knowing that there is an obvious power exchange being given. That’s what you need, that power exchange. This isn’t about sex, and sex alone won’t satisfy you unless there is an exchange of power involved, even subtle.

You still with me? Good. So what happens when you vent those biological needs and indulge in your marks? Chemical reactions. When you’re pushing in a scene, all kinds of positive endorphins and adrenaline and hormones rush through your brain and body, making you feel almost high as the weight of satisfying your needs settles in. You’ll need proper aftercare to make sure that you come down peaceful and okay, and after all is said and done you will feel much better. Think of it like any other biological need, if you don’t eat you’ll be hungry too. And you’ll feel crummy until you eat, and when you do eat properly, you’ll feel better. Some people eat different food than others, some people eat more often, but everybody eats. 

So what happens if you don’t feed those biological needs? That’s where withdrawals come in. Those biological needs will build and build until they take over your thoughts. You’ll start acting out, your emotions will suffer and you’ll feel out of balance and out of control. Moody is an understatement. If it gets bad enough, you’ll feel sick to your stomach too. First you’ll be wired, like you’ve got ants in your pants or just too much energy to spare. Then you’ll get tired, because mental treadmills are exhausting. It can go back and forth, more anger than sadness. Restlessness. This isn’t something that goes away completely until you find a way to satisfy some of your needs, though it won’t sit with you 24/7 it will come and go until you give yourself what you need.

But what happens after those chemicals finish their job and run out of juice? If you’re not immediately running into another scene, you’ll feel the difference, you’ll feel that sense of loss. That’s why aftercare is so important, because even if the Submissive seems fine and isn’t hurt physically from the scene, there is an emotional and mental toll that will catch up with them. There has to be something there to cushion the fall and take place of those endorphins. And Dom/mes are no different. You get a high from the power too, and when that power is gone you feel a loss too. If you do not take care of that, you’ll experience what is called a Sub/Dom Drop. Physical symptoms of a drop include fatigue, crying for no apparent reason, aches and pains, stomach aches, cold hands and/or feet, stiffness, or cravings for sweets. Emotional symptoms to look out for are sadness or melancholy, anxiety, agitation, depression, fear, confusion, guilt, or shame. They settle in like a BDSM hangover and can last anywhere from a few hours to the rest of the day. This will clear on its own and not return, unlike withdrawals, but why let it happen the hard way? If you can do a scene, you can do aftercare.

Before I begin, I want to make it known that this is OPTIONAL. I’m going to try to throw more of these up, maybe every week or so, and you’re free to do any of these optional ic and ooc challenges at any time. It doesn’t matter how long ago I posted the challenge prompt, go ahead and check the tag on this blog and do any of them at any time. Post your answers to the last one or pics for this one to social media and tag them tga:development and @tgaimportant​ and I’ll reblog them over there to make sure everyone sees them. 

Don’t be afraid to talk to each other about your answers  on the last one and the pictures for this one, that’s the whole point. If you’re shy, you can use the anon ask feature.

The new OPTIONAL CHALLENGE is WINTER FASHION.

Michael rolled his eyes and shook his head playfully. He wasn’t sure what had happened over the past couple of days, but as much as he’d tried to resist, he had found himself falling prey to whatever was happening with everyone else on campus. James hands on him sent shivers down his spine. “I need…” His words tapered off as he raised his hands, running his palms over James thighs, slowly. “You, Sir.”

“James?” Michael said, voice quiet while he dropped to his knees in front of the other man. “James.”  @tgatutor​

“This is new,” he teased, though they both knew it wasn’t the first time this had happened. Reaching for Michael, he ran his hands through the man’s hair and caressed his cheeks in praise. “There you are, my sweet boy. What do you need?”

Stress and uncertainty were things that had surrounded Michael his entire life. Growing up in the foster system, and the quality of many of the homes he’d found himself in, had created the perfect storm for him to become the detached, seemingly emotionless person he was. That was to say, emotionless other than the anger he usually so readily displayed. The events that had transpired across campus over the weekend had put Michael in one of the worst possible head spaces, leaving him feeling the need to isolate, to lash out, to do anything that prevented him from doing the one thing he really wanted, which was to cry. He sought shelter in the comfortable energy James had provided him for so many years, but solace was something he was still working towards being able to seek. James patience had been unmatched, but Michael couldn’t stop himself from worrying that one day, that patience might run out. The war raging within him sapped more energy than he had to give, and left him in a tailspin, needing to submit, but still unable to ask. When James pulled him into his lap, Michael felt something within himself beginning to soften, but his body relaxed only slightly. “I don’t know what to say. I’m…Tired. I feel…” Stopping himself, his head fell, eyes closing. “I don’t know. I don’t feel good.”

With Michael in his lap, James could give the other man the affection that he wanted to. His fingers carded through brunet hair with one hand, the other drawing soothing circles along the other man’s back underneath his shirt. He wanted to continue to urge the other man to rest, and to relax more. “You put a lot of energy out there, after sticking to just me for so long. That’s bound to happen. I’m proud of you, I think the year is finally turning out to be a productive one so it’s a good time to be comfortable enough to do that. Now is time to rest, though. My good boy.”

Michael raised himself from his position on the couch, tossing his phone aside while he moved into the bedroom, his eyes finding James immediately. “Hey.” He said, moving closer, wanting to reach for the man but stopping himself. Even now, after all this time, something within him forced him to stop himself just before he could say the things he wanted to say, and before he could express himself fully. “Things have been crazy. Stressful.” @tgatutor​

Things definitely had been tense for a few days and James was not surprised when the two of them spent that time together in the peace and quiet of his office and his suite in the administration building of The Academy. He wasn’t surprised when they didn’t talk about why either. Knowing Michael, he let the other man pretend like nothing was happening while people were exploding, knowing that addressing things while they had the potential to get worse would make it worse, so instead he distracted him the best he could and kept things comfortable for the both of them. Finally though, it was time to talk and James knew it the second a certain switch seemed to flip inside Michael and that new expression finally broke through and took over the calm one he’d had all of this time. Dissociating from the issue was done, now James sat up and scooted closer immediately, being the one to reach out without hesitation, pulling Michael into his lap and wrapping both arms around him. “Yeah, yeah they have. That’s an understatement. Talk to me, baby blue.”

James, here, coming in with some questions as I play the role of tutor. How do these incredibly personal questions help in a tutor-ly fashion? They help you learn more about yourself by pointing out a few important things, and if you’re brave enough to post them publicly, they can help you find a like-minded study buddy by showing other people a little more about who you are. Sounds fun, right? And to think, all you have to do is bare your soul. Answer as many or as few of these as you want, public or private, and if you have any questions for me, you know where to find me.

Don’t be afraid to talk to each other about your answers, that’s the whole point. You don’t have to answer them all either, just do what you want. Got more questions for someone? Use the anonymous feature and penetrate each other’s askboxes.

Full name?

Nicknames?

Date of birth? Age? Zodiac sign?

Height? Build?

Hair color? Hair style?

Eye color? Eye Shape? Glasses or contact lenses?

Which facial feature is most prominent? Which bodily feature is most prominent?

Other distinguishing features?

Skin? Hands? What are your feet like? (type of shoes, state of shoes, socks, gloves, pristine, dirty, worn, soft with lotion, calloused, long nails, fake nails, bitten nails, etc)

Make up?

Scars? Birthmarks? Tattoos?

Type of clothes? How do you wear your clothes?

Race/Ethnicity? Does that affect you or how you were raised? How?

Mannerisms?

Where were you born? Where were your parents born? Where were your grandparents’ born? How many times have you moved in your life?

What are your family’s values? Do you agree? How does this affect you? (This question is gold! If you don’t answer any other questions, answer this one! You can talk about how your character and their family feels about the Master/slave monster dystopian world politics and I can use this for the group revolution plot!)

Are you in good health? Do you have any medical problems?

Do you have any disabilities? 

What past act are you most ashamed of? What past act are you most proud of?

What sort of sex do you have?

Did you attend any kind of trade school before you got here? (So as a minor or in between the ages of 18-21, since it is law that all people go to a BDSM Academy at 21.)

Have you had any jobs? What are your career goals? (The laws on this are the same as the real world so minors generally need a work permit BUT you can also work with the family business without anyone questioning at just about any age. And just like the real world, a lot of families put a lot of pressure on their children to follow in their footsteps.)

What places have you visited on vacation?

Who is your favorite actor? Who is an actor you can’t stand?

What is your favorite movie? Which movies do you absolutely hate?

What is your favorite color? What is your favorite book? What is your favorite food?

How often do you exercise? What are your exercise goals?

Do you enjoy hot weather, or do you prefer colder temperatures?

What do you think is the meaning of life?

Michael’s eyes rolled at the jab, though he couldn’t help but to snort a little. “You should know by now, I don’t exactly get excited about much. Maybe it will be. You’ll be there.” His words were brief and his tone clipped, but Michael was sure James had spent enough time with him to read between the lines he’d laid out. His jaw nearly dropped at the suit that was pulled from the closet; he couldn’t remember ever having worn something so nice. It had occurred to him some time ago that he could go, he no longer faced true danger outside of the sanctuary of James’ suite. but it was a thought that had come and went, as he made excuses to himself to stay. As always, avoiding the truth. “You always say that, knowing you’re gonna get the same response. That’s fine and dandy, but I don’t ever wanna have to feel like I owe anything to anybody. Too much or not.”

They knew each other pretty well at this point, which was why they were still in each other’s company. It had been years at this point. As expected, things lightened when the suit came into view. James didn’t do this to be a savior, but he did love the way that the submissive’s face lit up whenever he was given something new. Especially nice things. “And you say that, knowing that I’m going to tell you that there’s nothing owed. This is to complete the experience, there’s no reason for you to feel like you’re less than anyone else tonight. I want you to come with me, like we have gone to every event since that first time I reached out to you. Only this time, it really is your own choice. If anyone owes something to the other, it’s me to you for that. Even just for staying here with me.”