pandora’s box anon you may have meant this . as a joke. but HERE WE GO
we don’t know what Kingdom Hearts (the moon) is but it made the world and a REALLY long time ago there were a buttload of keyblade wielders including the Master of Masters and his students the foretellers, who are less important but still there and cool. Mostly Ava and Luxu are the ones you want to pay attention to. there’s also YOU! and after you pick a foreteller-dodgeball-team (I’m Leopardus!) you live in a cute little town with all the other keyblade children and you spend your days with your cat collecting light and going to simulations of Disney worlds that don’t exist yet but they will and we know this because the master of masters stuck his eye in a keyblade and gave it to Luxu to take to the future so it can spy on stuff and he can write it down in the book of prophecies. Luxu is the Master of Master’s closest apprentice, and eventually he body-hops his way into being Xigbar. He has lifetimes of spying on stuff and hiding a cool box his master refused to tell him the contents of but it’s important, apparently. It might contain “””hope”””.
You don’t have a lot of friends but one day you make a friend named Ephemer! And then he’s gone. He shows up in your dream asking you to come find him, and you find Skuld instead, who also had an Ephemer dream. You team up and find Ava instead, who tells you he’s in an unchained dream state (still not sure what that means actually). She also tells you to join her club (the Dandelions) because in the future there’s gonna be an apocalyptic war and since you seem like good kids she wants you to not die. Skuld agrees but you hold off because that doesn’t sound good like Morally. You’re not sure you want to take the escape route while a ton of kids you know kill each other.
Meanwhile in the background your idyllic town has started getting infested by darkness and everyone’s coming up with excuses to fight each other and instead of diffusing tension the foretellers go welp! It’s apocalypse time. And it is! The badlands become the Keyblade Graveyard, home to thousands upon thousands of dead keyblade wielders. You’re the only survivor in the apocalypse aside from Ava’s dandelion club because your friends Ephemer and Skuld rescue you.
Now there’s only like a couple thousand of you but Ava decided that 1) once the foretellers are gone we’re gonna put five new kids in charge and 2) no one should have to remember the war or anything, it’s too traumatic. Except the kids in charge, which are Ephemer, Skuld, Blaine, Lauriam (marluxia, in the future -- keep in mind we are WAY in the past, we don’t know yet how they get to the present but signs point to the weird room in Hollow Bastion), and Ventus. Ventus is ten and that’s because Ava actually picked Lauriam’s sister Strelitzia but the literal physical manifestation of Darkness probably disguised itself as Ava, killed strelitzia, and gave her rulebook to Ven. Also possessed Ventus to make it look like he did it. this is a recent development still in the theorizing stages.
You are doing the stuff you always used to do because, if youll remember, you don’t remember the keyblade war! Instead youre going to simulation worlds and doing stuff like defeating hologram maleficent but this time it’s different because this isn’t HOLOGRAM DATA maleficent, this is REAL maleficent and she’s pretty upset about being in the past, because she just got killed by Riku, remembered that xehanort time travels so why can’t she, and yote herself back here. The literal manifestation of Darkness helps her out and tells her there’s a secret room in the castle with a time travel pod so she can get back to the future. Easy. We... do not know Darkness’ motivations.
Stuff gets weird, Lauriam asks around to try to find Strelitzia (who is dead, but they don’t know that) and finds Elrena (Larxene) in the process, Wreck it Ralph is here now and Daybreak town starts glitching which is bad because only the future Disney worlds are made of data, right, so Daybreak town shouldn’t be glitching unless it’s a data world. It is actually a data world, and you’re all stuck in it (YOU are not data you’re just in here like a bird in a cage, how fun!), and Darkness has already helped Maleficent out of it and back into the real world so she can time travel to the future again AFTER wrecking Lauriam who tried to stop her from leaving the data world (WHEW.). Ephemer tags you in to this game of Clue because Strelitzia had a crush on you AND you’re an extra hand, and you go to Wreck it Ralph and get weirded out by a bunch of Darklings (keyblade kids who fell to darkness and became monsters). Lauriam, while wrecked on the floor, has a vision of his ghost sister Strelitzia, and Ventus can’t handle remembering being an accessory to murder so badly that he knocks himself unconscious and you are CAUGHT UP babey!
there’s a lot more if you want to get really into understanding theory, and why possibly Ava is going rogue, and why MoM is terrifying, and what Blaine means when he says he’s a virus (and why his name is Brain and not Blaine........), but this is, bona fide, the shortest most concise stream-of-thought summary i can give you of the entirety of kingdom hearts union cross.
turnnoffyourmind
izzy806
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
2087
theartofmadeline
snowghoul
prguitarman
areudirty
yousharknotpass
discoholicmusic
