#zingbot

7. Monte- I’m sorry but this one just sucked.....not funny in the slightest, the delivery was bad, slow, weird, and just overall stupid. Also Monte is a lot of things, but he isn’t boring. Homeboy keeps us on our toes going back and forth between liking Taylor and hating her every damn week. 

6. Taylor- This could have been good if it was true? This couldn’t be more fucking opposite to how Taylor actually is. I have no idea how production thought they were eating this one in the slightest because she is literally the nicest person on the show. I’m confused. 

5. Michael- Likewise to Taylor, if this was targeted to someone else (honestly Daniel or Kyle) I would have loved that shit because this burn was brutal af, but for Michael it personally made no sense and was super disappointing considering Michael has a lot more to him than his face lol. Idk man you should have given this one to someone with nothing going for them. 

4. Terrance- I’m gonna be real I fucking lost it at this one. I know it’s kinda predictable to call the old people old at this point, but Terrance deserves it and I thought the DJ Showtime connection was clever on production’s part. 

3. Turner- Kind of expected, but very much needed. Hilarious, had a good connection with his traveling so the set-up was perfect, and it actually offended him so I think this one definitely hit the nail pretty hard. 

2. Brittany- I thought this one was fucking awesome. It’s even funnier that Brittany was genuinely insulted and confused like.....girl how did you not know? ALSO PEEPERS I lost it fr and whenever Zingbot cusses that gives any Zing bonus points. Iconic. 

Alyssa – Alyssaaaa! You’re from Florida, the sunshine state, which is ironic considering you’re so… dim. To be clear, I’m calling you dumb!

Xavier – Xavierrrrr, I’m gonna reveal your secret. You have a crush! All season long you’ve been admiring their body, getting lost in their eyes, and staring at their ass. Oh wait, that’s just… your reflection.

Tiffany – I’ve been zinging for over a decade now! And it never gets old, but you know what has? Tiffany. Four score and seven zings ago.

Claire – Oh my god, nobody move! We’re all in danger! I’ve spotted bigfoot, my bad… that’s just Claire.

Hannah – House guests, I have a joke for you! Knock, knock. HG: Who’s there? ZB: Hannah. HG: Hannah who? ZB: Exactly. Borrrzing!

Derek F – Big D, you’ve made quite the mark on the Big Brother house this summer. Too bad it’s in the… toilet

Azah – As a robot time, I can accurately predict the future. I’ve determined the following things will never happen: time travel, teleportation, Xavier going on a date with… Azah