Summary: You live a normal life until your favorite character from Love and Deepspace starts acting different. As if he is aware of your presence.
Tags: player!reader x zayne, fem!reader x zayne, reader x lads, self-aware!au, strong language, self-growth, personal issues, angst, fluff.
WC: +1k
A/N: Finally chapter 5 is here! Sorry for the wait I literally went through multiple mental breakdowns and emotional distress...hence why I didn't update this fic sooner lmao. Also, I'm such a liar for saying I would update on weekends because clearly that didn't happen, oops. Anyways. The positive thing is that I am back and even though this isn't a long chapter I still hope you enjoy it ^^. Also I really recommend reading "The Order of Time" by Carlo Rovelli. It is an amazing book on physics and that has helped me built this fanfic. Please leave a comment and share if you like this fic, it is greatly appreciated ^^ Happy reading!
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Ch.1 / Ch. 2 / Ch. 3 / Ch. 4 / Ch. 5
Chapter 5 - Heart Fluctuations
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“A fluctuation does not mean that what happens is not determined. The fluctuations in the deepspace occur at certain moments…in unpredictable ways. In his book The Order of Time, Carlo Rovelli talks about these fluctuations. Indeterminacy can be resolved when a quantity interacts with something else. In the interaction the electron materializes at a certain point—"
Zayne turned off the TV that played the latest updates on deepspace findings. He’d stopped reviewing the latest patients’ reports when Dr. Coleman, a renowned physicist in Linkon City, started sharing his advancements in a livestream of a seminar he couldn’t attend in person that day. Zayne sighed while sitting back on his chair and looked over at the window.
“A fluctuation does not mean that what happens is not determined…” he repeated under his breath. The theory could sound crazy to some, but to him it was clear as day. Knowledge that only people that were well studied in this area would understand. Even though he focused on cardiology and the human body, his knowledge went even further than medicine.
–
That day was a long and tiresome shift for him. Zayne was known for squeezing in up to three surgeries in one day. It was normal for him but a nightmare for his staff sometimes. Either way, they still celebrated every successful surgery, which was usually the case, by going for drinks and hotpot. Zayne never attended these outings, and he didn’t even give them time to beg him to go with them.
“You guys have fun and get some rest,” Zayne said as he walked past a couple of nurses that helped them during the surgeries of that day.
“Dr. Zayne, you should join us tonight!”
“Right, you’re the reason all these patients get to live long lives after all. It’s only fair for you to celebrate and take a break as well.”
Zayne slid his hands into the pockets of his white coat as he turned to look at them.
“It’s fine. I will be heading home soon anyways and—”
“Please, Dr. Zayne…” the group said in unison.
In the end he agreed to the outing, and soon he found himself sitting at a table while the staff ordered different kinds of meat for the hotpot and cheered, clinking their drinks.
“To Dr. Zayne,” one of the nurses said, standing up and holding his glass of beer high, which everyone followed. “For saving the lives of those who barely started living,” the crowd cheered, and there was more glass clinking.
–
Zayne didn’t remember finishing his drink. Once again his low alcohol tolerance became the reason for him to ask Greyson to drop him off at his house.
He struggled to open the door, squinting to make sure he was pressing the right numbers on the keypad to unlock it and finally walk in. He still managed to take off his shoes and coat and put them in the small closet near the entrance. A huff escaped him as he unbuttoned his shirt and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.
As he walked through the darkness, he could feel his thoughts become slower and heavier—like they were sinking instead of racing.
It wasn’t until he walked into his bedroom that he noticed you were curled up in his bed, one hand beneath your head while your lashes rested against your cheeks.
You were asleep in his bed. Not a projection or a hypothesis. The anomaly he’d been obsessing over was tangled in his sheets.
Zayne didn’t realize he’d stopped breathing until his chest started to ache. Then he moved quietly across the bedroom, and you instantly opened your sleepy eyes at the feeling of his weight sinking on the mattress and sitting next to you.
“Zayne…” you said his name, not even trying to hide the sleepiness in your voice, and he swore he could feel his heartbeat starting to pick up speed. Then you extended a hand to caress his cheek. As soon as he felt the warmth of your palm against his face, he couldn’t help but nuzzle it.
“I’m home,” he said softly.
Fluctuation Theory, Fragment 12:
When two systems exist in partial entanglement, prolonged observation increases instability rather than resolution.
“You’re warm. Did you drink?” you said, catching onto the slight smell. You knew his tolerance was very low, so seeing him with flushed cheeks and half-lidded eyes was not new to you; in fact, you thought it was adorable.
He huffed a breath. “I didn’t plan on drinking.”
Once your eyes were fully open was when you noticed. There was something wrong by the way his eyes lingered a beat longer than usual. “You alright?” Zayne could hear the concern in your voice.
He swallowed. “I don’t think I am…” Then he leaned toward you until your foreheads were pressed against each other. His eyes never stopped looking into yours, and he covered the hand you pressed against his cheek earlier. “I don’t know how much time we have… I don’t even know if this—if you are supposed to be real.”
Quantum Note, margin scribble:
If awareness originates outside the system, causality becomes recursive.
“I know I haven’t known you long,” he continued, voice breaking despite himself. “Not by conventional measures of time. But time doesn’t behave normally around you.”
His hand tightened around yours. “I became self-aware because of you. Not just of this world, but of the possibility that it isn’t the only one.”
You analyzed his face. It was as if he had tried to piece an impossible puzzle together, and even if he didn’t have an answer right away, he was determined to find it. Find the answer that led to you.
“Stop trying to solve it, Zayne,” you said, your voice coming out as a whisper. Your faces were inches apart “I am here…right now.”
“I… I’m…” Zayne looked at your lips, an immense hunger taking over him. He could see equations shattering somewhere in the back of his head.
Final Observation:
When systems entangle deeply enough, separation becomes theoretical.
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