When I was with my ex- there were specific physical things that I was uncomfortable with. I think it's a normal thing. you know, people all have different boundaries... I'd express them to him each time before we got into anything physical. and yet- every. single. time. he pushed it and pushed it and pushed it until he'd either take my no as an insult and storm off angrily and start yelling, or I'd give in and shut my brain down... when it would end I'd lay in bed and cry to myself and he'd start yelling at me for crying, so eventually I just started pretending to like it to make the anger stop... so now I tend to send mixed signals and be overly positive without meaning to....I think that's pretty messed up...
I go to therapy now and am attempting to work on boundaries... I think I'm doing a little better, but I have extreme fears of reliving those moments again.
