what if i went insane

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what if i went insane

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Young Nik needs music like air. If he doesn’t have music he’s humming (when it’s reasonable ofc).
Young Nik has a pair of headphones that had the old school aux jack with his diy mp3 player that he kept till this day. In it, it has a mix of heavy metal, rock and sometimes if he’s feeling it, some oldies romance song or audio files that reminds him of home. Sometimes the wire doesn’t work and the music phases in and out, the new gen airpods and earphones all were painful in his ears so he never bothered buying new ones. Headphones are fine but he still grumbled about it and prefer to use his old one, would replace the peeling earpads every few years, kept it nicely in a solid headphone case
Young Nik thoughts you saaaaay???
Not many but now thinking of how Nik would be surprisingly scrawny, just like his little brother.
Young!Nik who grew up thinking men should be toned and strong but no belly's. Who began lifting weights almost religiously to be like those big strong men in magazines and in movies.
Young!Nik who watched his younger brother fall through the ice when they were playing.
Young!Nik who ran up to one of those strong toned men begging for help.
Young!Nik who almost screamed when he thought a bear ran past to eat his drowning brother.
Young!Nik who stared wide eyed as a mountain of a man scooped out his little brother like a cub out of a puddle.
Young!Nik who suddenly saw what he believed a true strong man should be. A big mountain of a man, rosy cheeks, big hands like bear paws and oh so gently as they wrapped a fire fighter jacket around Vlad.
Young!Nik with the image seared into his mind, a strong man is a large bear. With big hands, a big grin, and gentler than a Shepard with a baby lamb.
Young!Nik who wanted to become like that fire fighter. Who ate more, and pushed extra portions onto his annoyed baby brothers plate. That real men are not just strong, but also Big.
Not so Young!Nik who recognizes that big smile in a much smaller body. Who begins sending a 'thank you' gift to the family of the man who saved his baby brother, now that he has a name to a face.
Not so Young!Nik who donates a grip of his funds to a fire fighter charity in the mans name.
Not so Young!Nik who sometimes buys a round not fire the service men he's with, but for the fire fighters at the next few tables over.
Young!Nik who pouts when Vlad would rather eat vegetables than the veal his brother offers him. :'(
*taps this ask* 'nuff said, this is the post itself
I kinda am torn between two different versions for young Nik, but one of them is definitely the one that had a drumset in a garage and played with his childhood friends in a barely known local band.
Ran around construction sites in summer and got his plimsoll shoes of the "Два мяча" brand covered in dust. Climbed apple trees in May and collected chestnuts in his pockets in September.
And got along with every stray dog he ever met.
I love this one, do you think he would give those stray dogs names? Maybe he even share his lunch with them even if he doesn’t have much
So my really specific young nik headcanon was that he was at the legendary Metallica performance in Moscow in 1991.
I'll put in a link below but there was estimated to be about 1.6 million people there and in the video you can see police officers and soldiers in the crowd.
I'd like to think he keeps the ticket stub and brings it up to brag every so often.
https://youtu.be/_W7wqQwa-TU?si=fJhoNCLqPIAw8cXH
omg I LOVE THAT!!!! He probably bought some merch and also casually talked to the band members hehe
video

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In his shadow part 4
part 1 | part 2 | part 3
YoungPrice/Nik
Price POV
Everytime they are picking up a new information packed from Nik there is a chance that Niks cover is blown and the Russian dead. But every bit of the rare pieces of information Nik gave them was from unspeakable value. Price looks at Kate who is setting across him. "We need to pull Nik", she sudenly speaks her thoughts sounding worried. "Why?", Price asks concerned a knot forming in his stomach "It's getting to dangerous, they are planning something big and he will get caught", Kate tells him, what she can in vague terms. "They want to sacrefice him", Price speaks out the obvious, the knot getting bigger as Kate nods. "Should mean they would give a fuck about such a high value informant", Price says disgusted. The Russian looked like he know this is his death sentence 4 months ago. "Hes unless for them the moment he's out", Kate explains voice empty. "What are your orders?" Price ask having a feeling what the answer is sacrefice Nikolai. Kate face turns sad and its all Price needs as an answer.
Price dont even knows when he starts caring for Nik in the last 4 months. It is probably when the blood soaked information arrived. The Russian clearly had to fight to get this information to them. His job today is to make sure Nikolai gets his news orders, which means telling him to stay put and die. He notices the men that is predenting to read the papers, but is watching the dead letter box. There first dead letter box is compromised, he changes to the one that is the furthest away, nervously playing with the chalk in his jacket pocket he needs to leave a sign for Nik to look for new instructions. He is about to walk to the dead letter box 4 when he gets the feeling he is being watched. Another compromised dead letter box. That 2/6 if two more are compromised they have to assume Nik was discovered, tortured for information and sold them to the enemy. Instead of directly going to one of the next letter boxes he goes into a book store, predenting he is intresteted in some of the books hoping to get a look at who ever is watching him, while planning with is the next spot he should go. From here he has to go through some small alleys, perfect to get away. By know the CIA and MI5 where able to give most members of the group a name and face, but Price dont reconices the man that is walking past him to the history section of the book store. Price grabs a random books to buy, to keep up his cover. The cashier, an man in his 40s, looks a bit strange at him when he gives him the book. "For your mother?", he asks him making conversation and Price has no idea what kind of book he picked. His russian improved but he did not look at the book at titel when he grabed it. "Yes", Price answers hoping that is the right answer and the cashier nods the strange look disappearing. "Not many sons would so openly buy this for there mothers", the cahsiers says while finshed the purchase. What did he just buy, Price is asking himself. "I'm a only child", he lies this being the only thing he can came up with and well if he thinks at the stage of his family this is maybe a half lie. "It's her birthday soon?", the cashier asks further and Price nods. "Hope she enjoys the book", the older man says to him and Price takes the book and walks out of the shop.
The man from the book store is not following him, but this don't means he that the next box is not also compromised. He is sudenly pressed against a wall a pistols against his head. "What's the SAS doing here?", the man asks him and holy shit how does he know. "Can't I go on a vacation?", Price asks back, a bad lie. "Oh and you always go to dead letter boxes when on vacation?", the Russian asks, pressing the weapon harder against his skull. "Don't know what you're talking about", Price says. "We know that you are having dead letter boxes all over this small village, don't lie do me. Watching you guys for 2 months now." Price is trying to figure out the time line of when Nik cover blow, but they just got the bloody information 6 weeks ago. "I can bring you to the police as a foraget agent", the man says and now Price is understanding that this man is from the FSB. "What do you know?", Price aks him, having to figure out what the Russians know at least a littel bit. "That you have 6 dead letter boxes you leave information we know about 2 you revive information, but they are well.. worthless to us. Price knows this is a gambel not giving up to much information but giving enough to share a bit to stay alive. "We have a informant in the region", Price admits something the FSB likely knows already. "Tell me something we don't already know", the Russian is growling clearly not impressed with such a obvious information. "I just know where the drop of areas and where to put the marks, it's need to know that's all I need to know to do this", Price lies hoping the agent is believing him. "How long?" He hears a clicking sound knowing if he gives the wrong answer he's dead. "5 months", Price answers his heart racing, the weapon is removed from his head. "Nice talking with you", FSB is sating before walking away. He survived, still he's in trouble for telling something true. He places his message, the agents clearly having left there observation spots, he still his hyper aware of his surroundings. Same at the spot for the marking.
Price is standing in the office the polish base leader lended them for their stay, wanting to fusion with chair is sitting in. The look the Captain is giving him is the worst nearly unbareble, Price never saw the man that angry. "Tell me what happened", the Captain finally says after 10 very long uncomfortable silent minutes, after Price reported his return and the mission being compromised. "The FSB knows about 8 of our 10 drop of points with Nikolai. They likely saw our last drop from Nik, but because of how spare the informations are we get they couldn't figure it out. So they put people on all the compromised boxes. One cornered me in a ally and asked me some things", Price starts the first part of the what happend, he squirms on the chair knowing he has to tell what he gave up a important information. "He let you go", the Captain just says, the why is silent. "I... told him the operation is 5 months long so I don't die, they also know I'm SAS", Price says, looking at the floor, mentally preparing himself to be told they expected more from Coronel Prices son. "That you came back alive to tell us the FSB is now involved don't weights out the information you gave them. But we also don't think that Nikolai can do his job much longer and thanks to him we have some promising leads and potential intel hiding spots. I will talk with MacMiller about your punishment. Good to have you back alive", the Captain tells him and Price cant believe it, not one word about his father when he fucked up this bad? A miracle honestly, so now he can fully worry about Nik.
Kate brought the bad news only 30 minutes later. "He got compromised", she tells him. "The whole operation is compromised now", Price sighs. Kate sliddes a piece of paper over the table.
In Saint Petersberg for a while
That's not how Niks messages work, at all, but it is his handwriting. "Fuck", Price wispers at this looking at the price of paper, turning it around in his hand. Kate is telling him something but he dont listen really to focused on a strange smell for a piece of paper. "John?", Kate asked him when he smells the paper. "Does the paper smell like lemon?", Price asks giving her the paper back. She also smells it aswell, before slowly nodding. "I think it does", she agrees. They look at each other before leaving the room together to go test their theory in Kates office. Kate turns the desk lamp upon before holding the paper as close as possibel to it. Slowly parts if the paper turn brown, revealing a second message.
Kaliningrad 14.10 weapon delivery
More like messages Niks leaves them, but it still could be a trap. Kate turns the paper in case on the lower half is also a secret message.
Some numbers apear and Price is starting to analyse what they could mean. "They made him writte this, so he was alive till today atleast", Kate speaks what they are both thinking, staring at the piece of paper. "They got him with the last one", Price agrees his face pale, did he had his problems with the Russian sure, but he gave them information about an organisation that wasn't even on their radar and he deserved better.
In his shadow
Young Price/Nik | inspired by tweet
Price POV
Jonathan Price Jr. always stands in the gigantic shadow of his father. Coronel John Price Sr. was hard on his soilder and even hader on his only son. Being the best was never good enough and Mrs Price did as her husband told her. It was a shitty childhood filled with the feeling of being unloved, unwanted and to do as you're told. Price and his sisters just followed the rules, the punishment for breaking them was not worth it. They all learned that sooner or later. His older Sister Hannah run away with a significant older man at 17 and never heared of again, his younger sister Susane is struggling with addiction since shes 15 and he was forced to enlist at 18. And all the time he is still in the shadow of his father. If he exalted it is nothing special because he is Coronel Price son if he failed he was told they expected more of Coronel Price son. He could not win. It was the same when he joined the SAS even if he gave 250% its expected from him. He worked himself to the bone and slowly starts to crawl out of the shadow his father is casting over him. First he hated his current CO, but now he's grateful to not get any special treatment anymore. If he performed good he got praise if he performed bad he got criticism like another member of the squad. At the beginning being treated like everyone else felt like being treated worse even if it always was all he ever wanted. He slowly became his own person for the first time in his life things finally start looking good, that's till Nikolai is entering his life. Well Nik fall, literally fall in his life and is a pain in Price ass ever since.
Sergeant John Price is hiding behind some bushes looking out if unwanted visitors are aproaching the target zone. His squad the Hell Hounds under Captain Jones is trying to find some important intel from a weapon dealers house at the Rusian-Polish border. He heard yelling getting louder through the open window from the second floor. Someone is running he hears the person getting closer and closer to the window, foot steps loudly echoing through the hallway, but its a dead end. Who ever is this stupid idiot running for his life jumps out of the window, hoping to land in the thorn bushes under the window. He hears the voice of a young man cursing before a weight is landing on him. His face is pressed against a bunch of rocks and he hears his nose break, the air brutally pressed out of his lungs. "Ah thanks", the young man says in russian when he gets up before dashing over towards the woods, running for his life. Angry screams from the window yelled at the young man Price just stays as still as possible, while blood is running out of his nose. By dumb luck the man who is screaming death threats is not looking down. "This is Bravo-4 looks like some was here before us", Lieutenant MacMiller says over radio. "Please repeat Bravo-4." The gears in Price head are turning, the man that jumped out the window, can he be the thief? "We are to late Bravo-0, the files are gone." It a gamble the angry screaming from the second floor ended a while ago, but that's had not to mean anything, also his job is it to make sure they get out here alive. "This Bravo-7 a few minutes ago a the possible thief run past my position towards the forest.", Price reports keeping some details to himself. "How long ago, Bravo-7?" "3-4 minutes." "Is the road clear?" "Yes Sir." "Go get him Junior. Bravo 3 and 4 also move to the forest" Price hates beeing called Junior but he he's on his feet running behind the assumed thief.
Who ever the guy is he clearly is unexperienced, getting on his track with no problem. The trace of stomped down flowers and farns, pieces of cloths on bushes made Price job easy. And soon he sees the back of them man. He has black hair, that is nearly shoulder long. He's wearing cloths to look like the personel of the arms dealers so he could blend in with out problem, maybe not such a bloddy amateur. Price gets closer and closer and the guy looks over his shoulder giving him a big grin. The look in his eyes seems to challenge him 'catch me if you can'. He can already touch the back of the jacket with his fingertips when the man suddenly takes a hard right, Price is sliding a bit over the floor before he is on course again. His lungs and legs are buring, having trouble to breath with his bleading nose. The Russian is trying to take a hard left but Price is able to ram in him they both fall on the hard forest floor. They tumble for a while, angry Russian and English curses echoing throughthe forest. Price gets a elbow to his face, against his nose, the pain making Price pull back a bit by instinkt. The Russian uses this to crawl away and trying to get on his feet again so Price can to pull him back by his ankle. They roll over the floor fighting each other for a while. During their fight the ear piece falls out of Price ear, so he dint hear the others asking for his postion. Price needs his whole body weight to keep the thief down so he can put the earpiece back in. Price pins the arms over the captives head, sitting on his lower stomach, they are facing each other. Both panting heavily blood running down both their faces. Price now having additional to his broken nose a bleeding eye brow, the Russian had a heavy bleeding lip and will get a big black eye. They angrily stare each other down. "You know normally I get diner first before I let people do this with me", the man says winking at Price. "Usally I do the pinning down, it's a interesting change." Price mouth is dropping open, he is speechless his russian is just good enough to understand what the man said based on context. "Bravo-7 what your status, we are on your track", it sound over the radio but Price is still to shocked to answer. The guy head buds him and against his nose again, but Price grip on him stays strong. "Motherfucker", Price curses in pain. "Who do you work for?", the Russian asks. "Who do you work for?", Price asks back in broken Russian. The Russian thinks a bit trying to figure out his accent. "British, huh?", the Russian states confused Price stays silent.
Bravo-4 is the first to get to them. His Lieutenant claps him on the shoulder as a good job. "Bravo-3 reached Junior and the target, turn right where we split up." "Understood." Price hates beeing called Junior, he is the youngest team member, but thats not why they call him that. They call him Junior because of his fucking father. The Prisoner watches Price reaction intresstet looking for a way to hopefully get out of the mess he got himself into. Even if the young Russian don't have what they look for he still has possibel information they need. They restrain their prisoner waiting for information about exfile. Bravo-3 patches both if them up, getting nearly bitten by their prisoner as a thanks. Besides this the Russian Price asumes is around the same age as him so 28ish. They ignore him way more worried about someone else also tracking their prisinor in this forest. They left so many traces behind a bloddy child could track them down. The silence is tense "This Bravo-0 exfile in 3 hours at point gamma." "Understood Bravo-0, see you there." They would have to walk rather fast to get to point gamma in time, it's the furthest West of the 4 exfile locations. The walk should take them this long and it's not like the prisoner is slowing them down on purpose he simply can't keep up their speed. Even Price struggels to keep up, because breathing his heard with a nose filled with dried blood. But he is to stuborn to be the reason they miss exfile and likely stay the night right in enemy territory. They maybe would have need 2 hours for this way with out him, now they only have half an hour left for still a 4th of the way to go. Bravo-4 throws the young Russian over his shoulder simply because they are faster this way. Angry russian curses are spat at him, but Bravo-4 seems to think they are funny. "I like this one Price, good catch." "Thanks Sir." Price would love if they didn't had to carry him with them. They didn't even check if he even has the documents, at least he will have some sort of useful information. They barely reach exfile on time. They basically throw the prisoner in the helicopter before climbing in themselves. "So that our thief?", Bravo-2 ask curios. "Gave Price a good fight", Bravo-3 sniggers, causing Price to roll his eye and their prisinor to smirk. So he does understand alteat a littel bit English.