#ymin

A bunch of 15-year-olds stole my heart.

A couple of months ago, I was asked by the administrators of my old high school to substitute for one of their Biblical Studies teachers, who was going on a study leave for three weeks. Even close to a decade after high school, I still retained some loyalty to the institution I considered my second home for thirteen years. In addition, the Biblical Studies teacher I was going to sub for was my seventh grade homeroom, Humanities, and English teacher. After clearing with my boss, I said yes.

A lot of my Instagram or Twitter posts have the hashtag #lovingwhatido. It’s not a lie. If I ever had doubts on what I’m passionate about, those were cleared in the time I spent with these teenagers. So today’s post is all about them, the things I love about them and the lessons I learned from them.

I love their zest for life and the ingenious creativity that burst forth from their inner beings. At 15 or 16, their whole lives are still ahead of them. Yes, bad things happen. But life is still very exciting for them. I can’t help feeling that this is something we adults have lost somewhere along the way. Also, a lot of these students haven’t experience the discouraging power of NO, where doors are locked or slammed shut in front of their faces. They aren’t limited by boxes yet. These students are so very creative. A broken laptop can easily be fixed by the power of duct tape. I guess that’s one way to do things!

A video posted by Tirza Magdiel (@tmagdiel) on Aug 31, 2015 at 12:49am PDT

I love the genuine, playful bonds of friendship. After college, I realized that it is much more difficult to create and maintain friendships. In school and college, I took for granted the fact that I saw my friends in class everyday. In college, I live just a few steps away from my friends. Now, in “the real world,” I had to be much more intentional about friendships. My current location being in Indonesia exacerbates the problem. Let’s not get me started on time differences.

I see these students form friendships and camaraderie. (From experience, this will come in handy when they go through IB Diploma Programme.) I see friends support each other. I see friends pray for each other. It is thoroughly encouraging. AND, it challenges me to reach out to my friends.

I love their raw honesty. These students oftentimes have no filter. Sometimes, that fact can get them into trouble. Other times, it made me realize how real that makes them. Some people might think that teenagers, especially these ones, live sheltered privileged lives without any sense of suffering or hardships. That would be a fallacy if there is any. I’ve had the opportunity to read some of their stories. Life happens. Life happens to teenagers as well. But sometimes, they are more honest about their feelings and their responses compared to us, adults. When they trust you enough to tell you what’s wrong, they tell you how it is - the unadulterated, brutal truth.

I love their big hearts. When they care, they care deeply. That’s why things are often at extremes for teenagers. “My life SUCKS!” or “This is the BEST DAY EVER!” or “I REALLY LOVE THIS!” or “I can’t stand the sight of this!” All in the same day. They feel everything deeply and they care. A lot. And I honestly love them for that!

Lesson #1: Teens can tell if you don’t truly care about them. They have savvy BS radars. So don’t bother trying to pretend to be someone you’re not. That won’t fly with them. Be who you are - flaws and all. They’ll actually respect you more for it. (I think.) Don’t lie to them too.

Really, I can’t imagine someone not caring for them. They’re fantastic! From the guy who can creepily imitate Barry Gibb singing “Stayin’ Alive” (Charis), the guy who I usually hear first before seeing (Daryl), the only guy who has ever kneeled in front of me upon seeing my face (Kevin), the girl who’s loud and spirited and would always break out into songs (Janice), the guy who has a difficult time figuring out where his heart is (Shaun), the guy who brought martabak to share with the class and made me very happy (Miguel), the girls who I think defined the word “fun” (Audrey, Bianca, Leoni), the guy with the duct taped laptop and who would give me home-baked cookies (Andrew), the guy who introduced himself as not liking the Seahawks but ended up somehow liking me around (Justin), and many more… Too many to name one by one.

Lesson #2: They do listen, you know. Sometimes teenagers are infamous for being inattentive and oblivious to things. Honestly, I’ve found that they do listen to you. It’s really about whether or not they trust and respect you enough to show you.

My best example of this isn’t actually schoolwork related. On the last day of my first stint of subbing these guys, I played a game of Jeopardy with them. One of the questions was this: I am the director and screenwriter for the Avengers movies, and I am also Tirza’s favorite writer/director. All three of the classes got it right. Quickly too. (The answer is: Who is Joss Whedon?) I mentioned Joss in my introductory class. The first session. But they remembered. It pretty much made my day, but it also taught me something. They are paying attention. O be careful what you say and how you act adults, parents, leaders. They do pay attention.

Lesson #3: Know your audience, meet them where they are. This is probably one of the ways I can apply our church’s family value, People over Programs. These teenagers don’t see the world the way I do. The way adults do. They don’t listen to the same kinds of music. They don’t read the same books. This past weekend, at teens service, the young adults led worship to give the teens a weekend off. We sang very loud, guitar-driven songs popular about a decade ago. And the response? Close to nothing. It’s just a different generation. Different preferences. Different ways to see the world.

In order for us to reach them, we need to meet them where they are. Use something that would relate to them. Back to my time subbing, I realized quickly that for them to really get the lessons, I needed to make the lessons relevant to them. I can’t mold the students to fit the lesson. I had to mold the lesson to fit the students. It’s for them anyways, right? What I’ve learned from this? The person/people is always more important than the program, the lesson plan, or even my schedule.

This post is getting too long. My bottom line:

To 10.1, 10.2, and 10.3

Thank you for welcoming me and for being your incredible selves. Love you all so much! I’ll see you around.

Earlier this evening Michael Sam (@MikeSamFootball) , SEC Co-Defensive Player of the Year publically acknowledged that he was openly gay. This marks the first time that a player who is entering this years NFL Draft coming up in two weeks has "come out" as openly gay. It will also mark the first time that an openly gay NFL player could be on an active team roster.

For a while now the NFL and in fact much of the professional sports world has been moving in this direction. Not long ago a current NBA player, Jason Collins, came out as being openly gay as well. He is a free agent open to sign with any NBA team. As of yet, no team has reached out to sign him.

So, what does this all mean in the world of Youth Ministry? At first glance most people wouldn't see a direct connection between the professional sports world and the world of Youth Ministry. But think about it...how many of our students watch, idolize, and even emulate iconic sports stars? I know in my ministry we have a large group of students that follow sports quite closely.

Does this mean I fear students coming out as gay because of a popular college athlete? Does this mean I will advise against watching the NFL? Not at all. Actually quite the opposite.

Just this morning I was speaking to our students about a mind set that we as believers need to have, especially as young leaders. See, most non-christians are well aware of what "Christians" are against. Walk through a mall and ask anyone you want, "Hey what kind of things really piss Christians off?" and you will get a pretty decent list. Ask the same people, "What are Christians for?" and you will get a remarkably shorter list.

The point is this. When it comes to Faith in Christ I think there is the 1 thing that matters, and then there is everything else. The one thing that matters is simply do you have a relationship with Jesus Christ? Is he your personal savior? Everything else falls into the category of sanctification.

Here's how I define sanctification. Sanctification is the line that stretches in between where a person is and where God wants them to be. It is not my job nor my responsibility to sanctify anyone...that's up to the Holy Spirit. My role is to simply be present, available and willing to help and support someone through that process provided they want me to.

So, how does this all tie together? It's like this. What Micheal Sam did tonight was something that takes a lot of courage. He is taking the risk of ruining his dream of an NFL career before its even happened. A friend of mine and great man, Sy Rogers once said, "It's not gay people who go to hell, it's people who aren't redeemed. Likewise, it's not straight people who go to heaven, it's those who have been redeemed by Jesus Christ.".

In ministry we have an incredible opportunity especially as it concerns students and this story that will likely be talked about extensively in the next few weeks. We have the chance to show students, parents, and all kinds of people what we are for. This is not about pro-gay, pro-rights, or anything like that. This is about being pro-Jesus.

When it comes to people I am someone who believes everyone needs Jesus. I also believe that Jesus has the power to transform lives. Micheal Sam's biggest need isn't heterosexuality, it's Jesus Christ. To be honest, I can't even say factually that he doesn't already have a relationship with Jesus Christ. He very well might. Again, my role isn't to sanctify a person. I know what the Bible says about Homosexuality, sexual immorality, and everything else. Those things are relevant to me, my life, and how I can continue my own path of sanctification. They are not tools, weapons, or bullets to use in pushing someone else through the process of sanctification.

Students already are wrestling with questions about their own sexuality, their friends sexuality, and more. They have concerns, curiosity, and all kinds of other feelings related to this conversation. As the church we are often so quick to shut down and close the door on these topics. We think that if we draw a big line in the sand and tell students there's God's side and then there's the devils side that we've done the right thing.

The truth is by not having open dialogue, by not being empathetic, covered with grace, and striving to always be under the banner of love we are doing so much more harm than good.

I'm reminded of the story of Jesus as he was preaching in the temple when the leaders and teachers of the law brought in a young girl caught in adultery. They reminded Jesus that the law says justice is served through the death of this young girl. When they demanded an answer from him, Jesus knelt down beside the girl and wrote something in the sand. After standing back up he turned to the crowd, now an angry mob with stones in their hands ready to end this young girls life, and he said, "Whoever is without sin, let him be the first one to throw". See, Jesus knew what the Bible says. He knew that justice called for the most severe of consequences. He didn't argue that the girl wasn't in the wrong, that she hadn't made a mistake, or that she didn't deserve what was coming. What Jesus did was incredible. In a moment where biblical justice was being demanded Jesus called for grace and gentleness to prevail.

I doubt that Michael Sam will ever read this, but if he did I would want him to know this: Michael, you are not defined by choices, preferences, or labels that others may place on you. You are not defined by your play on the field, your college, or even the NFL team you will likely play for. You are not defined by your past, your family, or your history. Micheal, you are defined in this way, Jesus looks at you and calls you, "mine". You are created by God, in his image and are given a purpose. You are not Micheal Sam, Gay Football player. You are simply, Micheal Sam.

My prayer is that this would be our message to students. You are not defined by what the world would say. You are defined by your creator, and he has called you his! Oh, that you would know what life is like to call your father in heaven "mine" and to know that he calls you the same.

I’m very excited to announce something that we have been working on to help equip youth pastors and youth leaders across the Northwest Ministry Network and beyond. On October 18th we will launch our very first Youth Pastor Hangout.

We have been looking for ways to help connect youth pastors and leaders with some of the leading voices in youth ministry. The truth is that most of us can’t fly across the nation to sit down with some of these leaders for a cup of coffee. So what if we could find a way to bring them to you? And there you have it: Youth Pastor Hangout.

Each month we will connect with a leader via Google Hangout. No matter where you are at (your office, your house, the golf course or even laying out by the pool working on your next sermon) you will be able to CONNECT. LEARN. and INTERACT. Each YP Hangout will be about a half hour long and it will include some teaching and equipping from some leading voices in youth ministry, as well as some time for you to interact and ask some questions of our guest using the hash tag #yphangout on Twitter.

We are very excited to kick off our Youth Pastor Hangouts with Kevin Moore, one of the nations leading youth pastors.  Here is a little bio excerpt from his website:

About Kevin:

I am a Youth Pastor.

For the past 20 years I have dedicated my life to building God’s Kingdom in the context of local church student ministry. After serving six years at the Student Pastor of Oneighty, the youth ministry of Chrurch on the Move in Tulsa, Ok, God has called my family and I to work alongside an incredible group of people at First Assembly of God in Visalia, California.

You could say that I’m an Author, Speaker and Leadership Coach, but at the very core of who I am is just a Youth Pastor trying his best to shine the light of Christ’s love to teenagers that desperately need Him.

We are going to have a great time talking with Kevin and learning from his years of wisdom developing youth ministry in the local church!

Can’t make it October 18th at 3:30 PM? No worries…we have you covered. Each of our YP Hangouts will be automatically recorded and posted to our youtube channel. You can watch it later, watch it again, pass it along to a friend…

We would love to have you join us! It’s going to be a great opportunity to grow together, share ideas and learn.

I’m very excited to announce something that we have been working on to help equip youth pastors and youth leaders across the Northwest Ministry Network and beyond. On October 18th we will launch our very first Youth Pastor Hangout.

We have been looking for ways to help connect youth pastors and leaders with some of the leading voices in youth ministry. The truth is that most of us can’t fly across the nation to sit down with some of these leaders for a cup of coffee. So what if we could find a way to bring them to you? And there you have it: Youth Pastor Hangout.

Each month we will connect with a leader via Google Hangout. No matter where you are at (your office, your house, the golf course or even laying out by the pool working on your next sermon) you will be able to CONNECT. LEARN. and INTERACT. Each YP Hangout will be about a half hour long and it will include some teaching and equipping from some leading voices in youth ministry, as well as some time for you to interact and ask some questions of our guest using the hash tag #yphangout on Twitter.

We are very excited to kick off our Youth Pastor Hangouts with Kevin Moore, one of the nations leading youth pastors.  Here is a little bio excerpt from his website:

About Kevin:

I am a Youth Pastor.

For the past 20 years I have dedicated my life to building God’s Kingdom in the context of local church student ministry. After serving six years at the Student Pastor of Oneighty, the youth ministry of Chrurch on the Move in Tulsa, Ok, God has called my family and I to work alongside an incredible group of people at First Assembly of God in Visalia, California.

You could say that I’m an Author, Speaker and Leadership Coach, but at the very core of who I am is just a Youth Pastor trying his best to shine the light of Christ’s love to teenagers that desperately need Him.

We are going to have a great time talking with Kevin and learning from his years of wisdom developing youth ministry in the local church!

Can’t make it October 18th at 3:30 PM? No worries…we have you covered. Each of our YP Hangouts will be automatically recorded and posted to our youtube channel. You can watch it later, watch it again, pass it along to a friend…

We would love to have you join us! It’s going to be a great opportunity to grow together, share ideas and learn.