SUMMARY: OKAY, maybe moving overseas the instant you got the acceptance letter from The College of New Jersey in (you guessed it) New Jersey, to join their Yellowjackets in the NCAA was in fact a bit reckless, but who cares? You were sick of Barcelona anyway, and the idea of being on a team filled with people you didn't know at all seemed —even if it felt a bit scary— appealing, to say the least. A change couldn't hurt, could it?
Well, if you consider falling hard for one of your teammates a good start, then yeah, you had the best fucking start in the world. But that's obviously not a good start (far from it, really) because Natalie isn't just a fierce on the ice and a pretty face, she's also got a whole aromory to destroy you. But you've always been kind of a masochist anyway…
CHAPTERS:
one : pre-season
two: ice, ice, baby
three: jocks and fucks
four : heart eyes
five / six / seven / eight / nine / ten / eleven / twelve /thirteen / fourteen / fifteen / sixteen / seventeen / eighteen / nineteen / twenty
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The killing moon part 1 | natalie scatorccio x reader (Yellowjackets)
Master list
Words 6k
Chapter one “I heard a rumour, what have you done to her”
"Gabriella you've got work on your footing" She can hear him, she can always hear him, he stays in the back of her mind as a constant reminder that no matter what she wasn't what he had planned for his life, she knew from birth she was a series of supposed to bes', second bests, she was supposed to be born a boy, a mistake made by one of the doctors who didn't look close enough, she was supposed to be an Olympian in the making, for god sake, her father was a soccer coach it was in her genes, but no matter how many things her father had planned for her she always fell second best a constant reminder of what should've been.
Gabriella knew from a young age that she was never going to live up to what her father wanted, but she tried god she tried. She was so selfish for his love, so selfish and so desperate which is why when her father shows praise for another girl on her team, a girl Gabriella hasn't bothered to even get the name of, she feels it, the thing she's felt her whole life and knows she has to get his attention any attention, bad, good anything she needed it, that mindset alone was dangerous but the fact that she had now made eye contact with the stick poking out of the ground was more.
"She's bleeding"
"COACH SHES BLEEDING"
"Gabriella's bleeding"
Gabriella laid on the ground smiling up as everything around her moved at fast paces, she knew she was selfish, how couldn't she be in a life like this when acting selfishly is the only way to receive love.
"JACKIE" a teammate had shouted from somewhere on the grass making Gabriella look towards the girl whose name was being yelled, the Yellowjackets, her father's greatest accomplishment, were currently playing their last game of the season, the game that was the deciding factor of whether or not the Martinez house was going to be silent or boastful. The game so far didn't look too good, the teams coming up on a tie, that's until Gabriella watches as the ball shoots right at Jackie's head bouncing off and landing right into the goal.
For a second it is silent, the realisation of what just happened slowly hitting everyone.
Then it goes.
"WERE GOING TO NATIONALS BITCHES" a scream is heard.
Then a circle forms, and someone's hand grabs Gabriella's wrist and drags her into it as well, she stumbles clashing against her other teammates but no one notices or cares, they're too busy jumping.
"BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ" The girls are cheering and laughing so hard that Gabriella can't help but join in, they're going to nationals.
-
"That was a good game, Gabriella," her dad starts and before she can even get happy at the acknowledgment, "but you still gotta work on that left foot of yours" It comes crashing down again, she knows he isn't saying this to be hurtful, lord knows he's said worse, and at this point, she doesn't take his cruel words to heart anymore, the desperation for her father's affection whilst still strong, doesn't crumble her world as much as it used to, at least not since the incident.
Gabriella acknowledges what her father says worth a grumble, then turning to stare at the window, she wonders what it would be like living a life that doesn't feel like a battle for approval, a father that wanted a girl.
After a bit of driving the father and daughter duo pull into the family's garage, the two getting out of the car and heading inside their nice suburban home.
"mija how was the game today" Gabriella's mother greets her, cooking some dinner in the kitchen.
"Was good" Gabriella replies shortly, giving her mom a nod to which her mother just turns back to the task at hand. "You going to nationals?" She hears a voice ask from the kitchen table, it's Javi her little brother, the only other person that's just as much a fuck up in this family as she is. "Yes el perdedor" Gabriella replies while putting a hand in his hair and ruffling it.
"Gabriella leave your brother alone," her mother tsks at the two teenagers "But that's amazing, you Yellowjackets are something".
And Gabriella knows her mother is right, she just hates that she has to share that stage of talent with others.
Gabriella nods at her mother's comment and mumbles something about needing to go to her room for a bit.
-
Gabriella has gone the last four years without forming a singular proper bond with any of her teammates outside of what was necessary, it honestly wasn't something she did on purpose she just didn't have time for a social life by the time she was finished with everything else, soccer and her school came first, people are disposable and are to only been interacted with when they can provide something.
This is why it is very awkward for her on days like this when they're doing a prep rally, a whole event dedicated to them which meant acting like she was happy to be sharing the spotlight.
In the locker room and she stares into her blue locker, thinking of soccer strategies while her teammates all around her are singing along to Salt n Peppas shoop.
"Girls what's my weakness!?"
"MEN!"
The Locker room erupts in louder singing, laughter and what seems like Taissa and Natalie doing a makeshift dance or rap battle with each other, the noise catches Gabriella's attention and she looks at the Miniature concert, as she does she makes eye contact with Natalie, one of her teammates who in particular has a vendetta against Gabriella, she's short to everyone else but Gabriella with shaggy blonde hair that just screams I don't care, and dark eye make up that makes her already piercing blue eyes somehow even more piercing, so piercing in fact that Gabriella takes one look and slams her locker shut walking off, not wanting to feel the strangeness she fills in her stomach, people are disposable.
Gabriella walks into the bathroom area of the locker room seeing more of her teammates in there, Van and Allie, Van is the teams' goalie a pretty girl with sharp features and red hair and Allie is their youngest addition, a freshman that honestly Gabriella doesn't really understand how she got on the team but she doesn't question her father.
Upon Gabriella entering Van looks up smiling at her, " hey flex, You want a bee too?" She says nodding towards the pile of face paint next to her being used to draw a bee currently on allies face, while Allie is mumbling about something.
Gabriella shakes her head no, giving Van what she hopes is a kind smile. It luckily must've come across as such cause Van smiles at her back and then goes back to focusing her full attention on allies cheek.
Looking away from van she spots Lottie standing in the doorway that leads to the auditorium, nodding her head at her in acknowledgment Gabriella realises she hasn't seen one of her team members at all, "where's Jackie?" She asks, why are you asking , she shakes the thought and looks back at Lottie awaiting the reply.
"Coach asked to see her" Lottie says a little sheepishly, Gabriella feels her jaw tense a little at hearing this, she knows what this meeting means and she also knows she should be in there not Jackie, but she doesn't voice these opinions just puts a polite smile back on and nods.
Disposable
Gabriella turns away from the other girls back here and looks in the mirror fixing her appearance up, looking at herself she takes notice of everything, her nose is too long too manly she thinks, her brows are too unkept, her blue eyes look dull and lifeless opposed to others, her shoulder length brown hair is too short for her liking and so is her fringe that is cut into a micro-bang style a hair style only to make sure nothing goes in her face while playing, after assessing her face she decides it's too manly and probably the reason she's never had a boyfriend, not that she minds too much, boyfriends don't provide anything to her.
She then looks down at her body currently covered by the blue and yellow colour soccer uniform, and decides that while her face is too manly her body is too womanly, her body developed too much while having a lot in the truck on her chest, the lower part of her body was just put muscle from the years of playing soccer.
She stares at her body deciding her chest is what was the cause of those years of torment from bobby and she can't stand to look at herslef anymore when that thought flashes through.
Stepping back from the mirror she grabs her straightened hair and puts it in two low buns.
Finally out of her own head she hears van scoff "you're done" she says to Allie, the younger girl nodding and practically skipping off while van still stands there in shock about something. Before Gabriella gets to ask what she missed Lottie scoffs and comes to stand next to van, "Jesus Christ" van and lottie laugh "does someone wanna tell Kelly Kapowski to maybe worry less about prom and worry more about not fucking up nationals" Lottie finishes while fixing her hair, van making faces in the mirror and taissa now joking the four of them in the bathroom also looking in the mirror.
"Oh come on." Van says.
"If she plays like she did at states-" Lottie starts until taissa looks up with a knowing smile "don't worry, that's not going to happen" she says crossing her arms still smiling, she then walks off.
Gabriella is left standing there feeling like she might've missed some big context, but doesn't bother asking cause honestly she couldn't care.
Disposable.
-
"Now our next act needs no introduction, so let's all just make some noise for your New Jersey girls state soccer champions" Gabriella hears the Principal yell out marking the girls cue to run out.
The train of Yellowjackets leads with jackie the girls all running out to the beach boys good vibrations playing loudly over the auditorium speakers, as they run the girls crack smiles all feeling like a prize in auction on show while the school students and staff all cheer and holler for them.
The girls run into a line standing next to each other, Gabriella stands somewhat in the middle of line next to Natalie, she looks into the crowd of people cheering for her basking in the delusion that her dad is there cheering on for just her, but she knows the reality of it. While standing there, she feels soemthing brush against her hand, not thinking much of it she continues pretending her dad is there watching only her, when she feels it again, she looks down and see Natalie trying to press her pointer finger tip to hers, she glared at Natalie and as subtly as she can moves away from the touch not caring to even look at the other girls reaction.
Disposable.
-
Walking out of the school building next to shauna , Gabriella sees three of her other teammates in a semi circle talking, Gabriella guesses soemthing serious is getting spoken about because she can feel the tension from here, and from that alone she is ready to walk away and have no part in it, until she over hears taissa.
"This is what we worked for all season you really wanna take that chance?"
Upon hearing this both shauna and Gabriella make their way joining the circle, "yeah cause I'm not a fucking asshole" Nat retaliates back.
"What are you guys talking about?" Shauna questions, Gabriella not bothering to speak but curious.
Lottie looking a little bit stressed is the first to give any idea to the conversation at hand "Allie."
Before Lottie can say anything else, "what about her?" Shauna questions again.
"Did you black out at states," taissa questions looking at the Shauna and Gabriella "she totally choked-"
"She's a freshman tai" Natalie cuts in. "She's a liability" taissa finishes.
"So what do you want to do about it?" Shauna questions again, Gabriella staring straight at taissa wanting to hear what she's got planned, as much as Gabriella thinks getting to know her teammates is pointless from what she knows of taissa she trusts her judgment when it comes to winning, taissa is headstrong and taissa is selfish like Gabriella she fights for that spotlight as well and will do what it takes to win no matter the cost, something Gabriel can admire in a person.
"She can't screw up if she doesn't get the ball." Taissa says as a matter of fact.
"You want to freeze her out?" Shauna says finally understanding what's going on.
Gabriel looks around trying to have the other girls opinions, none of them are readable except taissa who has clearly given this some thought and Natalie who looks so offended by the sheer idea of the context of the conversation.
"Atleast we'd know what we're working with-" taissa says arms crossed looking around to see if any one agrees with her, "she does have a point." Gabriella says dryly, the other looks at her in shock that she's stated an opinion and actually spoken to them, all of them except Natalie though who is now glaring daggers at not just taissa but also gabriella.
"She does kinda suck," Lottie also adds, "but I don't know"
"That's because it's bullshit." Nat says still looking at gabriella with a look that can only be described as betrayal, Gabriella doesn't humour her with a expression back choosing to remain unfazed but she doesn't understand nats looks at her, she doesn't owe her anything.
"Oh yeah what's your plan then?" Taissa says with a hint of venom in her tone dropping her hands.
"I don't know, play like a fucking team and win," Natalie says returning the tone, looking taissa up and down "it's worked so far"
"Everything works until it doesn't, and for the record you smell like a wino, get your shit together" taissa says back to her.
Natalie looks around at everyone seeing if they are going to say something, she stops when her eyes land on Gabriella, Gabriella raises a eyebrow to her and Natalie's eyes turn back into a glare.
"You know what," she looks down a smile now on her face "fuck this" she says, giving one last harsh look to Gabriella and storms off away from the girls.
"Wow." Taissa says, turning to the group.
"Doesn't feel right." Lottie says leaving in the same direction Natalie did.
Gabriella decides to leave at the same time as Lottie, not bothering to state an opinion anymore , once Taissa has her mind up on something there's no changing it anyways, not that she wants to change this one.
-
"Alright everyone bring it in, take a knee ladies," coach Ben says, blowing his whistle to get the team who is currently doing drills attention.
"What's up state champs!," the girls are now on their knees on the ground in front of him, his words causing them to cheer at the mention of their recent win. "Okay so, jv is gonna help us out with a little scrimmage today, coach Martinez had to take care of a family thing," his words bring confusing to Gabriella, family thing? There's no family thing? He never misses a practice, clearly some of the other team members have the same train of thought as her cause when she looks up again there's heads turned looking at her, "so jv you're gonna grab a penny from misty and get started" coach finishes the curious girls not interested in what's going on with coach anymore.
"Coach Scott shouldn't we say a prayer first?" One of the girls says, Laura Lee a tall blonde girl with a heart of gold and a love for religion, if there's anyone on this team you can't hate it's her.
"Ah it's just a scrimmage Laura Lee" coach says a little uncomfortable. Laura Lee in her politest way possible is not taking that for an answer and shoots coach ben an awkward half smile, "but, uh sure yeah knock yourself out" he finally relents.
"Heavenly father let our efforts remain fruitful," Laura Lee begins the prayer, some girls put their head down prayer some others just stay silent in respect. Gabriella has never been the religious type remembering how awful it felt getting dragged to church as a kid, but she also isn't the non religious type, it's kind of another thing that feels disposable to her, serves her no need or goal.
"Amen" she hears some girls shout bring her out of her short thoughts, the word signifying Laura Lee end of grace, and the start of practice.
At the command of coach Scott the girls all start practicing, Gabriella taking her place at the back as a centre back she watches the game unfold in front of her.
Throughout the game she notices Natalie passing a lot to Allie something that brings an eye roll to Gabriella's face, and as much as it seems Natalie is trying to help Allie out, Allie is still falling at getting the ball.
Being reminded of the conversation from earlier she notices Taissa run up to coach and says something to him, nothing Gabriella can hear from her position. "Alright let's go variety, Taissa wants to see you step it up and quite frankly so do I"
That's when it happens, Gabriella watches the scene happen so fast, disposable, it starts with Taissa taking charge of the ball stealing it from Allie, Allie then trying to take the ball back in retaliation and Taissa reacting to this by pushing Allie away "this is the game step it up" Gabriella hears being said between the two girls.
She watches as shauna goes up to Taissa where they have a small conversation, Gabriella not able to hear this either, but she knows what's about to happen isn't good she feels it, she feels it like she felt it that day.
She runs, she runs fast, runs from her dads words, her teammates screams, she runs, she sees it, a stick, a big stick it's got almost 30 centimetres of height to it and a thick pointy end, she runs to it and without thinking she does it SNAP.
She wishes bones snapping didn't sound so close to a stick snapping, because if it didn't she wouldn't be standing here in the middle of her soccer field trying to calm what feels like might be a panic attack. Taissa had a plan, and Taissas selfish like her.
The scene feels unreal to her, like it's a cruel joke set out to remind her of the wrong she'd done. Taissa had broken allies leg, not just broken her leg she had hit her hard enough the girls bone snapped in half and was currently out on view for all to see the damaged caused by Taissa.
Everyone around her is panicking, allies screaming is all she can seem to focus her mind on, she's trying to understand but everything feels to much, she wants to help she wants to say something, do anything but she can't she is selfish, she doesn't want to speak and feel any burden of guilt of what had to been done to his girl, so she doesn't help she stays quiet, and she stays quiet as she watches misty try to help, she stays quiet as coach Scott and her teammates rush to aide, and she stays quiet as Allie is rushed off to hospital.
-
Ironically enough the locker room is too quiet, everyone's acting busy getting ready to go home so no one has to mention what just happened on the soccer field.
Gabriella sits on the floor back against some random locker, she has her head down focusing on her breathing when Jackie comes in "I know we're all really worried about Allie, but it might not be as bad as it looks." Gabriella looks up at Jackie, staring blankly wondering what her father sees in this girl to make her captain.
Natalie says what everyone's thinking "you could see her fucking bones Jackie, I'm pretty sure it's exactly as bad as it looks." As she finishes she shoots a look at Gabriella.
"I'm going to be sick." Van says nausea radiating off the girl.
"Ok but, I mean, we're still a team and we still have each other." Jackie says crossing her arms over, she looks so desperate to be a leader that Gabriella kind of feels a bit of putty towards the girl.
"And the lord works in mysterious ways" Laura Lee offers up trying to be kind. At her works Natalie stands up and slams her locker shut grabbing her bag storming out, "nice work Taissa" Natalie's words leaving a solemn aura to the room as no one dares to say anymore.
-
"How was school turd?" Gabriella asks as her little brother gets into the passenger seat. The young boy looks up and rolls his eyes at his sisters name calling, "it was fine, how was your prep rally and practice?"
Gabriella sighs and gives a dead look back, jacks understands what she means by that and turns the radio up, setting the two Martinez children into a comfortable silence.
You'd think Gabriella would be over silences, with how silent her day to day life is but the truth is there's nothing she loves more, silent means no socialising, silence means not saying the wrong thing, silence leaves no room for mistakes and that comforts Gabriella.
The rest of ride home is silent only ever sometimes filled with the noise of javi sketching something. Gabriella drives but she can't stop thinking about Natalie's look, it was so distraught, so betrayed? Gabriella wonders what she has done to the girl, they hardly knew each other, the lingering thought of you know why keeps voicing itself in the back of her mind, but before she can even touch on it the siblings are pulling into the family's drive way.
Upon walking into the house Gabriella can sense the tension, today their house inst a place of home but instead a warzone. proving Gabriella's suspicions right when she turns the corner into the dining room her mother and father sit clearly ready to have a family talk.
Javi and Gabriella share a look between themselves, "mi hijo sit please," their mother says quietly ushering them to sit down.
Once the two teens are seated their father clears his throat, "me and your mother are taking a little break," he starts, Gabriella feels her fingers start ripping at the skin around her fingernail, "I've done something to upset your moth-"
"cerdo you slept with a another woman!" Gabriella's mother shrieks cutting her father off, "me and your father are getting a divorce" she states plainly staring at her once was husband with disgust.
Javi goes to say something but Gabriella stands up loudly, "no," she says about to walk off.
"What do you mean no?" Her father says growing angry at the situation and his daughters growing attitude.
Gabriella stands tall for once not feeling afraid of her father, he doesn't have perfect anymore "I said no, you both don't get to do this to me, I leave for nationals tomorrow, you didn't even show up to practice today dad. You held getting to nationals over my head for Months you don't to get just push this onto me as well, sort it out after nationals." She says leaving her parents a little stunned, she doesn't get to take much of it in though cause as quickly as she spoke she was out of the dinning room ignoring her fathers booming voice to come right back and heading upstairs instead.
Gabriella enters her room, its a medium sized room decked out like a image of what a teenage girls room should be, all white furniture with big white fuzzy blankets and a small bear plushie in the middle of her pillows, the room screams femininity all furniture bought by her dad and not allowed to be changed, the only thing that shows Gabriella actually lives in this room is the wall of soccer trophies from over the years and a framed photo of her and javi on her nightstand, other then that you'd think this was a show room and sometimes she has a hard time remembering it's not.
Gabriella for the past four years hasn't socialised with anyone, her limited socialisation comes from her teammates and javi, she's been too a couple of highschool parties never really enjoying them, but she's never been to one for the Yellowjackets something about it seems commit full like if she goes she's pushing an image she doesn't know if she likes, which is why she's confused staring at her freshly make up caked face and an outfit consisting of a black sweater and small black skirt.
She looks at her hair deciding to just leave it down and heads out her house before she can have any second thoughts about going to this party.
-
The whole way to the party Gabriella tries to not think think about what happened at the last party she attended, she makes a point to note the same won't happen again tonight.
Upon arriving she notices shauna and Jackie drinking together with a bunch of other people she doesn't know too well around a bunch of cars, she also takes notice that Natalie is here, choosing not to notice the clammy feeling her hands have suddenly gotten, and decides if she's gonna make it through this party she needs a drink.
Grabbing a drink off van who seems to be guarding the keg Stand she walks off to sip at her drink leaning against a tree regretting even coming.
In true Yellowjackets fashion she gets reminded why she doesn't come to these events when shauna walks over to Taissa.
"I admire your resilience knowing you fucking crippled someone today" Shauna says to Taissa, clearly drunk, Lottie and van standing next to the girls but not getting in the conversation yet.
"Ok good talk" Taissa says defeated and goes to walk off until Shauna speaks up clearly not wanting this argument to end, "just admit you did it on purpose"
Taissa turns around slowly and walks back up to Shauna, Gabriella stands heading towards the girls the sinking feeling from practice coming back again. "excuse me?" Taissa says on the defence instead this time.
"You heard me"
"Your wasted" Taissa says trying to diffuse the situation.
"And you're a sociopath." Shauna says back keeping the argument going.
Van seeing where this is heading puts a hand out on Shauna "woah, calm down."
Shauna immediately pushes van off, "no, listen you guys we don't have to worry about the Allie problem anymore, because Taissa fixed it for us." Shaunas getting louder and louder by the second, causing more attention to be drawn to the group of girls, Laura Lee and Natalie now also joining the girls.
"What's she talking about?" Gabriella hears Laura Lee ask Natalie. "She's talking about Taissa little plan."
Taissa turns to them both "oh please, since when did you give a shit anyway, don't you have a bong to hit or a dick to suck?"
Gabriella goes to defend Natalie but Shauna beats her to the chase "don't talk to her like that" she semi slurs at Taissa.
"Oh fuck off shauna, I don't need you to defend me," Natalie says sounding more pissed off "last time I checked you were fine with the whole freeze her out strategy."
"Okay seriously what are we talking about?" Laura Lee finally exclaims louder.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP LAURA LEE!" The group yells in unison except Gabriella.
"Okay can we all just chill the fuck out no need to yell." Gabriella says moving to stand close to Laura Lee, she pretends not to notice Natalie's odd stare at her movement.
Some of the girls like van and Lottie start talking over the test agreeing that they need to stop until Taissa decides to start it back up again, "somebody needs to take her wasted ass home"
Shauna gets closer to Taissa "say that again bitch" at this the two girls start arguing and trying to fight each other.
Van and Lottie trying to push them apart and diffuse the situation, Gabriella just standing there noticing Natalie's stare.
The argument starts actually getting physical with Gabriella now also trying to get the girls to back off from each other, but it doesn't matter cause all the yelling has drawn them an audience and some boy yells "cat fight!" The girls still not stopping only getting worse also gets Jackie's attention who now stomps over to the group.
"ENOUGH!" She yells at them causing them all to go quiet, she looks around seeming a little shocked her yell worked and honestly Gabriella is too cause even she's tuned into what Jackie's got to say.
After a moment Jackie says loudly "Yellowjackets with me NOW!" And storms off further into the tree filled area, all the girls following suit, even Gabriella to her own surprise, maybe her dad was right. Disposable
"I don't know what the fuck that was, but I do know that it's over," Jackie starts talking to the group of girls, "we're about to go to nationals and based on what I'm looking at right now, we may as well not even bother getting on that plane." She pauses looking at her team, seeming like she's thinking up something.
"Alright," she pauses "everybody line up" she stops for a second and when nobody moves she continues "no I'm fucking serious line up come on!" She orders clapping her hands together.
The girls start forming a line Gabriella placed between lotting and Shauna and she thinks again about her dads choice of Jackie being their leader and kind of understands his decision.
"Here's what we're gonna do," Jackie starts once the girls are in a proper line "I want each of you to go down this line and say one nice true thing about every other girl on this team."
"What is this fucking Girl Scout camp." Taissa says softly to van causing van to snort.
"Who wants to go first?" Jack asks. "I'll go Jackie" Laura Lee says enthusiastically stepping up to do this activity causing Jackie to break out in a smile and let Laura start.
Laura Lee makes her way in front of Taissa first "Taissa, you are beautiful in the eyes of our lord" Gabriella can already tell how this gonna go based if this first interaction but doesn't say anything.
After Taissa let's out a mumble of acknowledgment laura Lee then moves down to van.
"Van you are beaut-" "oh my god" Lottie exclaims with annoyance causing some of the other girls to giggle.
"Ok laura Lee fall back," Jackie says seeming a little stressed "okay, I'll go first"
Jackie makes her way in front of Taissa, "Taissa turner, you have more fight in you then anyone I've ever know, I'm inspired by your determination." Jackie says to the girl leaving her seeming at a loss for words.
When Taissa doesn't reply Jackie moves down to van, "Vanessa Palmer," van does a little head nod at this, "your smile makes me feel happy everytime I see it" Jackie giggles out, van blushes and nods her head in what seems like gratitude.
"Laura Lee, I truly admire your faith" Laura Lee smiles and nods happily.
"Nat I love that you don't care what anybody thinks," Natalie looks a little uncomfortable hearing the compliment but Jackie continues "your so completely yourself-"
"She's also deadly at beer pong" van announces causing laughter erupt within the group, "so go on tell her," Jackie says urging the girls to partake.
Gabriella gets paired up with Taissa first, "taissa I admire how loyal you are to the sport, how you'll do what you can to make sure we'll succeed" Gabriella thinks up on the spot, she doesn't know these people she cant really participate in this activity but she tried and Taissa seems to understand that and gives her a polite smile and nod.
"Flex, I think you're very strong and like how you never back down on your opinions" Taissa says making it Gabriella's turn to smile and nod.
Somehow after tassia Gabriella lands face to face with Natalie, who's staring down at her with big eyes, her pupils dilated by ten fold. The two girls just stare at each other for a second not knowing what to say or who to start when Natalie breaks the stare off by giggly softly.
"I think you're prettyyy," Natalie giggles playing with Gabriella's hair "and I think about that night a lottt" Natalie adds on still playing with the other girls hair, her words slurring a little bit clearly on something judging from the state she's in, knowing that Natalie is saying this while under the influence leaves a small pang in Gabriella's chest, but it goes ignored.
Gabriella freezes at that last sentence her mouth going dry, disposable, your sick, get away from your sick, starts screaming in her head, she feels it again, she felt it when she carved that stick into her back, she felt it when bobby farleigh made up the rumour of her being a dyke, she felt it when her and Nat kissed at that party, and she felt it when she saw allies bone. She needs to leave she needs to get out she can't be sick.
Gabriella pushes Natalie's hand off her and speed walks away, ignoring the confused where are you going and come backs of the others and especially ignoring the look on Natalie's face, she needs to get home, she can't be here anymore.
On her way home she tries to force her brain to think about nationals, nationals is all that matters, not Jackie's stupid line up, not Natalie's constant reminder of that party, not her parents marriage, just nations the rest of it all was just disposable.
Notes:
Word count (5844) hey guys so this is the first chapter!! I don't have a set in plan for the story yet but it is going to follow the episodes quite closely but also with some cannon divergence cause yeah Travis inst there but instead my girl Gabriella. Also non of the things in this story said about lgbt+ is meant to harm or reflection of my feelings, it is just Gabriella is a closeted lesbian in the 90s she's gonna have some internalised homophobia so sorry about the words used. But anyways I hope this whole chapter made sense and you guys enjoyed it, idk when chapter two will be out cause this took me awhile to write but hopefully sometime soon :))) byeee.
Pucking 7 Yellowjackets hockey SMAU - Natalie Scatorccio x reader
Moving to another country had a lot of pros: one the one hand, you had a good appartment, (thanks scholarship!) nice roomates, a school's name that would look great on your resumée , well located… but starting on August wasn't one of them. August, seriously? Fuck Pre-season, for god's sake…
On top of that, the heat and the awful ball of anexiety curling into your stomach and threatening to crawl up your throat, you had to meet them. What if they didn't like you? what if you weren't good enough? what if all this was a mistake? what if—
"Hey," the sudden voice intrussion made your head bob up, tensing your body to sit up and abandon the previous lay-down position you'd been for the past— hour? "…you good?" Mari's long hair hung lower on her right side as she tilted her head. Her eyes darted on your face, brows slightly furrowed as she searched in your expression.
There she was. Mari Ibarra. Well, Mariana, but nobody really called her that. Doesn't matter— she had been unbelievably sweet to you. Maybe it was the fact that you also spoke spanish, (even if it was a differenent dialect, you two understood each other perfectly) or just because she had craved someone to 'gang up' with against your other two roomates, Taissa and Vanessa, who she'd call Lapas Lesbianas (Lesbian Limpets) , something that would make the couple snort.
"Uh- yeah yeah I was just um… y'know. Laying around." It came out as an insecure sputter of words, and Mari did ofcourse not buy it.
"Nuh," she muttered, pink and yellow mismatched socks sliding over the plush carpet of your room, "you're thinking something. What is it?" you moved to sit on the edge of your bed making space for her, bare toes grazing the tender strings of fuzz. "I um…" you started, clearing your throat as you felt her weight dip on the bed. "I dunno. I was just thinking."
"Bullshit—" her dark hair tickled your arm as she turned to sit facing you "what, you think they're gonna hate you and you're gonna suck so hard you're gonna get kicked out of the team?" she questioned.
"Um… maybe…?" you muttered, gaining a oh for fucks sake from her plush lips. "No! everything's gonna be great, understood?" you let out a sigh, staring back at her deep brown eyes. "y/n." She stared, tone demaning.
"Mari." You mimicked, tilting your head the same way to follow her emphasis.
"You little shit—" a nudge to your shoulder, a low ow from your lips that was quickly covered by her voice "Seriously! it's just pre-season. It's just skating. Like- literally."
You scratched the back of your neck with certain doubt, and Mari couldn't help but shake you by your shoulders. "Leave that looser's mentality."
"But—"
"NO. Manifest! If you think negatively, it'll have a negative outcome!" you sighed and then rubbed your eyes. "Say it! Everything is gonna be great, I'm gonna get along with the team, practice is gonna be grea—"
"Mari are you seriously torturing her with that stupid ass manifestation thing?" Van's voice cut through.
"I'm not torturing anyone!" The tanned responds, giving the ginger a look as she leans on your doorframe. "Doesn't seem like it," Van hums back grinning.
Mari huffs and rolls her eyes. "What's up anyway?" The freckled face asks as she steps into the room.
"She's scared the team's not gonna like her—"
"Mari!" You cut through, heat rushing to your cheeks.
"It's true!" She defends.
"Doesn't mean you need to say it outloud!"
"There's nothing wrong with it! you need to—"
"You're seriously overthinking over the team liking you?" Vanessa interrupts the back and forth.
"Uh- well yeah. Newsflash: this is gonna be my team for the next, what, year? I don't wanna fuck up and have a terrible relationship with the whole team—"
"We met you five days ago and we've been doing amazing so far," Vanessa hums. Mari nods while letting out a cheerful 'True!' and you can't help but sigh. "Yeah, but you guys are easy. Not everyone is like that—"
"Did you just call us easy?" Van starts.
"Wha— no! I mean yes, but not like that—" You stutter.
"She called us easy?" Taissa chimes in (when did she join in?) "Wow. Low blow y/n."
"Yeah low blow" Mari murmurs holding back a grin as she nudges you.
You groan, rubbing your face and laying back on your bed. "I hate you all."
They all chuckle, and all of your phones buzz in unison. You frown, reaching for yours along the others.
“Uh oh,” Van muttered, already checking her screen. “Mama Taylor’s back.”
Taissa groans at the nickname. “Don’t call her that.”
Pucking 7 Yellowjackets hockey SMAU - Natalie Scatorccio x reader
note: I'm sorry this took foreverrrr but at least we finally have a playlist!
You fiddled with the soggy sausage Kevin or Harling (you honestly don't remember, what are even these names?) had pressed to your plate. When you heard 'the boys' were taking care of dinner, you didn't expect much, but this was beyond disgusting. The few beans that had arrived to your side of the table where stiff and uncooked, and the mashed potatoes— let's just not talk about the mashed potatoes…
"Enjoying the american dream, Catalonia?" Van teased, her wide grin pushing her freckled rosy cheeks into a cute roundness that reminded you of a hamster.
"More like american nightmare," Taissa snorted blowing her eeves dropping cover, curls bouncing as she shook her head to look at you. "You don't like any of it?"
"Are you kidding me? Sweaty sausage feat. Rock beans and slaughtered potatoes, what a feast…" you murmured sarcastically.
More laughs from your now teammates filled the table, and the tought of someone slightly enjoying this terrible dinner thanks to you comforted you a bit. "I promise not all american food is like this," Charlotte's— Well Lottie, she just liked Lottie— soft voice hummed on your right.
"Trailer park food is," Van cut, chuckling.
"It can't be this bad," you hummed, pointing at the cardboard plate that pathetically sat in front of you. "Nah, newbie is right, not even trailer park food was this bad," Natalie chimed in, finally letting go of the plastic fork and watching as it slid through the gooey food (if you could call it that).
Her green eyes scanned you for the fifth time, glancing to your chest and darting back to your face. She hadn't stopped looking at you all night. You just wore your favourite shorts and a dark off shoulder top that let the freckles of your chest shine shamlessly. In her defense, she looked at your face for most of the time. Either way, you caugh her red handed in most of them. Not that you didn't mind. She was pretty, and having the designated badass of the team check you out didn't help but to make you more confident. And confidence is key, right?
"It seems Farleigh's got your eye on you," Jackie hums, smiley as she shakes her shoulders in a happy mannerism.
"Well he can look somewhere else" you mimick her tone and moves, making Shauna snort and Mari laugh.
"Well your boyfriend is gonna love that" Natalie murmurs, low enough to play it as she doesn't care, but loud enough for you to hear. Just an indirect way to ask if you're single. Suave.
"I don't have a boyfriend,"
"Oh? We thought you did. When jackie was stalking your instagram—" Mari starts, but Jackie cuts her off.
"I wasn't stalking her!"
"You said she was pretty."
Your captain's mouth opens and closes a couple times. "That's objectively!"
"You're very pretty too, Jackie. Objectively." More laughs and a side eye from Nat to Jackie, you end up listening to one of Van's crazy stories.
"We should go somewhere when we get outta here," you murmur, watching as the potatoes deflate.
"Wait- that's like a great idea!" Jackie said widesmiled, still a little flustered from earler. Looking to her right where Shauna sat, she nudged her with her manicured nails. "Ow- I- yeah it's a great uh… idea. We could um… go to a bar?" Shauna mumbled, unsure of what the (brunette) wanted her to say. "Or to get ice cream! Yeah!" Jackie clarified, making Mari huff. "Why can't we get drunk?"
"Because it's pre season and we have practice tomorrow morning! Early!" Jackie cut in.
"But-!"
"Nuh-uh-uh, you heard what mama Jackie said. We must stay in our enclosure." Van stopped Mari, getting a dirty look from her. "Enclosure? We're not animals! Besides- why do you keep calling me Mama Taylor? I don't get it-"
"YOOO NATT!" But Jackie's monologue was cut by Bret- Brat- Bennet? Whatever! Everyone turned to the voice, and Natalie moved in her seat, uncomfortable from all the attention. The guy chuckles with his teammates, and grinning, he speaks again. "How's your summer gone huh?" Natalie let out an uncomfortable 'good', as if she knew what was coming up next. And you hated that. The big mouthed girl with witty remarks and questionable humour reduced to a quiet uncomfortable statue. "You planning on enjoying the semester like last year? because if you do, you prolly gonna need a fidelity card for the rugby team, since you keep coming back for each player…" it's a snarky, gross, animalistic tone. Purely disgusting. His friends wheeze and chuckle in disbelief, surprised one of their own hulligans has had the guts to say something as disgusting as that.
"Yeah how many you've got left to try from the team?" Another one chimes in, air filling with hyena looking laughs. Natalie's face contorts in a grimace, notoriously uncomfortable by the akward moment.
Before he can open his mouth again, you cut in. "How's yours? We've heard you've already gotten alllll the points! have you been upgraded to VIP? " Your smile is wide and fake, tone obviously sarcastic. The guy looks taken back by your words, but the anger flaring from your gut out of the disgust toward this guys makes you continue. "Oh c'mon Barry, don't be embarassed! You said it yourself, you're a winner, aren't you? Besides, we all know why you guys take so long in the changing rooms…" You hum the last part to Van, getting her to chime in into laughing at the jerk.
"Fuck you you dykes! you're the ones being lesbos in the changing room—"
"Ohhh did we hit a nerve?" You grin. "Why are you so emotional, buddy?"
And that does, in fact, make everything worse. Jock nr.1 is very much pissed, and even if most part of the guys are laughing at him, (just like your teammates) the other half is either trying to hold their monkey back or yelling profanities back.
But Nat is smiling and laughing now, so hearing 'go back to your country' and variations of it doesn't really do much to you. You've heard worse, anyway.
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Pucking 7 Yellowjackets hockey SMAU - Natalie Scatorccio x reader
You check your phone again.
Six sharp.
Maybe it was a bit excessive to wake up at five thirty and leave your shared apartment no later than five fifty, but you hated being late. More so, you hated people that were late. So avoiding becoming what you hate the most was somehow… constructive? Yeah. Constructive.
Pushing the heavy door open, you enter the training rink. Big, wide— well more like huge. The air is fresh and cold at the same time, making your skin tingle as the temperature softly penetrates you. It somehow feels great, giving the circumstances and the hot temperature outside.
You take a few steps forward, hands sliding over the edge of the half wall as you walk closer to the tiny door. The ice is even, practically new (except for the few scratches that are already shining beneath the blinding lights). The lines are vivid, the net looks slightly used, and so do the corners of the plexyglass. And somehow, you find it beautiful. This is gonna be your home, at last for a year. You’re already imagining the bleachers full, fighting for the puck, scoring and—
“Early riser, aren’t ya?”
You turn your head in a sudden move, catching the slim form behind you. Turning, you stutter “I- yeah I didn’t wanna be late on the first day. I’m never late anyway, so—”
Her rosy lips twitch into a lopsided grin, and you feel your heart stutter when her green eyes scan your form. “Well Jackie is gonna love that.” She hums. Some bleached blonde strands of hair fall from her lower bun, and her cheeks are slightly red from the outside heat. “Nat.” She says after a beat of silence.
“I’m y/n, the—”
“The exchange girl, yeah I know.” It doesn’t come out in a mean way, just in a low murmured tone. She’s probably just like that, so you give her a soft grin. “Been gossiping about me?” You say, almost matching her tone if it weren’t for the slight nerveousness in your voice.
She laughs and shrugs, slightly tilting her head. “Hm. Somethig like that.”
“Ohh I see,” you murmur, not being able to hold back a smile. Why is she so fucking pretty? “Were you guys user_4679295?”
“Mmm no, we were actually kate_elopez21”
That makes you laugh, and her grin widens even more. She follows with a soft laugh, more to do it with you rather than a geniuine laugh. When you both quiet down, she speaks again. “You going to the changing room?”
“I was going to, when I found it.”
“Well, I can show you where it is,” She says, sliding her hands in the pockets of her sweatpants.
“Oh, great.” You adjust your duffel bag as you start to move behind her, rushing a bit to get beside her.
“So, Miss Barcelona,” she starts, making you snort at the stupid nickname. “You’ve been playing for a long time?”
“Yeah, since I was like nine,” you smile as you walk beside her. “How bout you?”
“Oh I started in my Sophmore year,” She murmurs “Wasn’t even cause I liked it. I kinda um… got in to avoid getting expelled.”
You chuckle at that letting out a ‘Seriously?’ And laughing even more when she nods with a yes “What did you even do?”
“I uhhh might have tried to steal chem gear to make a bong,” You laugh, hand coming to cover your mouth. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it off…” She grumbles trying to hold back a smile.
“I’m sorry but that’s hilarious,” she rolls her eyes, holding the FEMALE CHANGING ROOM’s door open for you. Muttering a ‘thanks’ you follow her in.
“It’s not the best, but it’s good enough I guess,” you take in the room; old benches, creacky lockers, leaking sinks and showers missing tiles. “It is.” Is all you say.
“Okay team, line up!” Jackie’s chocolate ponytail wiggles behind her as she moves, following her hair bobs as she looks at all of you. “Okay! Good morning ladies,” Coach Martinez’s voice is far from Jackie’s sweet tone as he slides in front of you all. “I know we still have a few weeks before classes start but we need to be ready for the upcoming season. This week’s trainings are gonna be focused on practicing our skills and on trust.”
“Trust? What are we a middle aged couple trying to avoide divorce for the sake of your children?” Van murmurs grinning.
“Vanessa it’s our first day, give me a break with your jester jokes,” The older man murmurs, making averyone laugh even more. She snorts and murmurs a (not really) apologetic ‘sorry, sorry’. “Okay, well, trust and all that bullshit i have to tell yall. Anyway, aside from that, welcome back or welcome in, depending if it’s your first year with us. Buzz buzz Yellowjackets or whatever!” Jackie woops and claps, nudging Shauna to follow with the clapping and cheering. You follow after seeing the rest of the girls chime in, some more excited than the others. Natalie claps lazyly, and Van keeps trying to hold back a laugh.
“Ooookay, we’re gonna start with some drills, but before that, we need some warm up. Jackie, you can uh… take it from here” he murmurs, not bothering to get an answer back before he slides off the ice.
“Okay! Well I’m Jackie Taylor, team captain and center, for those who are new, and I’m very excited to welcome you all to the team! This is gonna be a great year and we're gonna kill it and hopefully get to nationals and not miss on the semifinals like we did last year. So yeah! I’m glad to see new faces and well, this is gonna be great!” She smiles wide and excited, hands squeezing her stick’s pink tape. You all clap, (you don’t really know why, guess it’s to cheer her) before she slides her phone off her pocket. “Oh just to remind you all, each year we make a warm-up playlist, you just have to request and I’ll add you as a co-creator so you can add your own songs to the playlist.” She presses play, and the speakers start to fill the stadium with the rhythm of ‘ice ice baby’.
“Seriously cap? You really didn’t rack your brains in this one, did you?” Natalie murmurs with her usual teasing grin.
“I didn’t add this one!” She shoots back, long brows scrunching in a furrowed ball.
“I did,” Van grins, skating backwards in a silly dance as she sings ‘ice-ice bah-byy’ under her breath. Taissa huffs rolling her eyes, but a smile still peeks from her chapsticked lips. “You’re unbelievable.”
“You say that all of the time,” Her girlfriend smiles teasing as she skates around her. “I don’t mean it like that,”
“I dony meany it nyke yat—” the ginger mocks, ganing a nudge from the curly haired “ow!”
“Ladies! get to working! Now!” Coach yells from the bleachers, huffing with his thick brows clumping together.
I knowww I've lowk been missing but I'm having midterms (i have finals on june, kill me) and I've been writting here and there so I just wanted to update yall a bit!!
pt.2 of Talk to me is almost done (gotta fix and polish some stuff) but yeah!! + there's a fawn eyes blurb coming as soon as I can (pre-crash,) as I wanted to show a bit of their dynamic before it all went down anddd I also have some other random stuff halfway done?? (spider-gwen nat, older! teacher robin, Pucking 7 chapter 4-already scripted- ...) Idk what to work on first lmao
what would you like to see first?
talk to me pt 2 (vamp nat, twilight x yjks crossover)
