#year19

Every day I lose hope faster than the last. Try to replenish my much needed optimism towards my life for 30 minutes. Yet another person comes and uses what what little energy I have left for negativity. Every day I feel like dying faster than the last. Every day

There were so many chances I did not take. So many opportunities I did not realize where even there. So many lives I did not save. So many dreams I did not follow. So many books I did not finish. So many friends I did not appreciate. So many loves I did not declare. So many letters I did not write. So many words I did not say. So many truths I did not tell. So many words I did not say. So many days I did not like. So many conversations I did not enjoy. So many nights I did not sleep. There were so many things I did. So many drugs I took. So many drinks I had. So much hate I felt. So many nightmares I dreamed. So many fights I lost. So many days I forgot. So many memories I made. So many dreams I abandoned.  So many friends I lost. So many things I saw. So many hearts I broke. So many battles I could not win. So many people I hurt. So many decisions I made. There's just so much I haven't seen yet. So many people I haven't talked to. So many things I haven't seen. So many places I haven't visited. So many dreams I haven't had. So many songs I haven't listened to. So many stories I haven't heard. So many flaws I haven't found. So many tales I haven't told. So many secrets I haven't shared. So many loves I haven't felt. So many lips I haven't kissed. So many things I haven't tried. So many tears I haven't cried. So many changes I haven't taken. So many laughs I haven't laughed. So many hands I haven't hold. So many books I haven't read. So many thoughts I haven't thought. So many fights I haven't fought. So many days I haven't lived.

There are only two options left and I've decided to start anew.